Why did Lil wayne decide to be a rapper? Because he would earn a very large amount of money and fame.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Sausage is brown, and so is my wife.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why did the monkey follow the tree? Because it was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Hey Nerochan, how high is your IQ?

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Knock knock Who's there? Rick Rick who? Your wife's boss. I regret to inform you that your wife has sustained a injury on the job and she is in intensive care... I also regret to inform you that your insurance doesn't cover the injury

thumb_up thumb_down -34

What do you call a horse with out ears? A horse with out ears?

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Why did the blonde put lysol in the soup? to kill her husband

thumb_up thumb_down -36

How do you flatten a worm? Feed it to a little boy, and then drop a refrigerator on him.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

A cow walks into an Asian bar and asks for a beer. The bartender asks it for I.D. It says "it doesn't matter. I came by horse."

thumb_up thumb_down -56

Why did bob die Cause he got hit by a mailbox

thumb_up thumb_down -62

Your mama's so fat her patronus is a cake!

thumb_up thumb_down -74

A black guy, a white guy and a Pakistani are walking together when they see a lamp, They rub the lamp and out pops a Genie who, with only three wishes to grant, lets them have one wish each. The Pakistani wishes that all people of Pakistani origin are returned to their country with health and wealth. The black guy thinks this is a good idea and asks for the same for all Africans and Caribbean's. The white guy says "are there really no more Pakistani's or blacks in the country?" The Genie confirms this is accurate. The white guy is devastated, who will drive the buses, operate the power stations, produce the medicines and work in the hospitals that these people did? I wish for them to be returned.

thumb_up thumb_down +65

How to confuse a blonde. Buy 14 monkeys dye them purple and orange and hide them in her wardrobe

thumb_up thumb_down +61

A ninja walks into a bar the bartender asks "what would you like?" The ninja says "i'll have two green eyes" the bartender says "we dont have green eyes this is america" so the ninja is so mad that he goes home and brutally beats his wife with a spatula.

thumb_up thumb_down +57

A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. But it wasn't as good as he had hoped it would be.

thumb_up thumb_down +53

roses ar red vilots ar blue i have hiv

thumb_up thumb_down +49

Chuck Norris drove to McDonalds and ordered a Whopper. Much to his dismay, McDonalds does not make Whoppers, because that is the signature fast-food burger of McDonald's biggest competitor, Burger King.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

Q. Why Did The Blond Have The Biggest Boobs In The Third Grade? A. Because She's 21

thumb_up thumb_down +49

a muslim, jew, and catholic went into a bar and sat down and had drinks. The muslim asks the jew "are you macrobiotic". the jew replies "no" and they go about their fun....

thumb_up thumb_down +47

Ask me if i am a tree are you a tree? no

thumb_up thumb_down +47

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She got shot.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Why did the mormon walk into a bar? He didn't. Mormons don't drink.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Man who wrote "The Hokey Pokey" died. Hard part was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in and then the trouble started..

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Q: What is black, white, and red all over? A: A white wall with black and red paint just added onto it recently.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops