what happens when two small children jump into a pool full of pedophiles? They splash around and have fun

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Why is it as hot as the sun? Because it is the sun

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Diarrhea

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Jesus was nailed to the cross by Roman guards... His disciples were kept behind a line of guards and they could not hear Jesus speak. They can see he was saying something, so they had to get closer to hear what he was saying. John dodged a guard and ran towards Jesus, but a guard cut his leg off with a sword... Peter ran for it and got past John but another guard cut off one of his legs... Matthew saw this opportunity to dodge both guards and jets past both John and Peter and gets to the foot of the cross... Jesus looks down at Matthew and says, "Matthew.... I can see your house from here!"

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What type of person does a black guy go to when he's sick? The doctor

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Why did the father beat his daughter? To alleviate stress.

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How do two blondes stay alive at the bottom of a pool for 30 minutes? They don't and they died

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I've had amnesia as long as I can remember

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Q: What did Santa give the little boy for Christmas? A: Nothing, he's not real

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how do you fit 20 babies into a bucket? you put them into a blender. how do you get them out? chips.

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Me and me!!!! LOL! i'm a comedian!

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what do you get when a bear and a man mix a really pissed off bear and a dead man

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whats red and black and green all over? a paint job gone bad

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how do you kill a zombie? Zombies arent real.

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Why did the Black Man sit at the back of the bus? Because all the other seats were taken.

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What is the difference between a dog being hit by a car and an Arab being hit by a car? There are skidmarks before the dog

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What's a terrorists Favorite color Orange

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Knock Knock Who's there? Luke Futie

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I enjoy vagina. While you enjoy penis in your mouth. Just remember God hates fags. :)

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A blonde walked into a phone pole.

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What's the difference between a duck? An armchair because the vest has no sleeves.

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what do you call a man with three eyes and eleven fingers? his name

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Why couldn't little Sarah smell the roses? Her face was mauled by a grizzly bear

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larry clark i smoke pot and im gay its phillup

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops