What did the skeleton say to the man? Nothing.

Q: how do you get a girl with one arm to fall out a tree? Wave and wait for her to wave back.

How do you kill a polar bear? You melt the polar ice caps and take a rope and choke it till it is out cold. You then put a plastic bag over its head and throw it in the water.

What is your favorite joke? I like bar jokes. Okay knock knock Who's there? A bartender A bartender who? A bartender walks into a bar but before he went through the door, he decided to knock on the door because this lame joke is so random.

Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

What's worse than 1,000 babies stapled to 1,000 trees? 1001 babies stapled to 1001 trees.

Your mom's so fat that she went in to get liposuction and subsequently died from infection.

Q;what do you call a fish with two knees and personally HANDS out JOBS A: a blowfish

There once was a man in Peru, Who dreamt he was eating his shoe. He was promptly taken to the hospital but died from infection.

Q: What do you get when Justin Bieber gets his own tv show? A: suiside!

A Black man and an Asian man are at a bar. They have a few drinks and then leave.

Why did little Bobby put a firecracker in the dog's ass? Don't worry, he used lube.

What did the homeless man get for christmas? NOTHING, he died.

What did the 85 year old man do after having the sex of his life? He found out he had AIDS.

What did Greg say to John? Nothing. Greg died in a horrible plane crash

Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

A Japanese woman walks into a Korean deli, and asks the Korean man if she can buy some groceries. They are able to get past their cultural differences, and share their favorite recipes.

A Priest and a Rabbi pass a Muslim boy sleeping on the street. The Priest remarks "What a tragedy"; the Rabbi agrees and they both open non-denominational homeless shelters in their temples.

Q: Why did sally fall off the swing? A: She got hit in the face with an axe

What is the way to a woman's heart? Through her chest cavity.

5

A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

Why was the man with cancer bald? He wanted to tan his scalp.

Women's Rights

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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