What is red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the water? A: Drowning.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

How much coke can Charlie Sheen do? Enough to kill two and a half men.

Why was the boy with a green and blue collared shirt holding a bottle of rice dead at the bottom of the sea? Because he was pushed of a boat and couldn't swim.

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What do you call Chuck Norris when there is a bullet inside of him? Dead.

What is blue and has clouds in it? The sky.

Q: What did one poor guy say to the other poor guy? A: We're both black

What do a white dog and a black dog have in common? They're both white...except for the black one

What do you call 2 tigers, a zebra, and a walrus? A small zoo full of 4 animals

what did the white guy say to the mexican? mow my lawn asshole

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw them

I saw a shovel once.

Why did alfred crap his pants? because he had downs

keep your eye off me if you dont look at me, how do you know i looked at you? there is a mirror

emma: how will we survive zombies? mat t: just give me a blow job ......4 seconds later emma: so what now?

God bless America, and no where else.

A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The bartender asks the rabbi "why the long face?" The rabbi says "to get to the other side." Seeing the puzzled look on the bartender's face, the priest says, "orange you glad he didn't say banana?"

Whats brown and sticky? Shit.

What's red and smells like cherries Cherries

Why did 6 hook up with 7 ?

A Black man, a Mexican, and a Midget, get in a car. They drive to the county fair and get snow cones and have a really fun time.

3 penguins meet each other in penguin #1's backyard for a pool party. The first penguin climbs up the steps of the water slide gets to the top, looks around and then slides down the slide *SPLASH* The second penguin climbs up the steps, looks around then slides down the slide *SPLASH* The third penguin hastily climbs the steps and slides down the slide radio -Soulbroker

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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