Whats yellow and cant swim? A bulldozer.

How is butter and your mom similar? They both consist of much fat.

Q: What did the man say before he was stabbed? A: "What are you gonna do, stab me?"

How do you wake up Lady GAGA? A sludge hammer!

Whats 9 + 10? 19

What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas Mittens

A man goes to a doctor to check about an itch on his testicles. Turns out it was just a rash and is promptly prescribed medication and it clears up in a week.

Why did the woman cross the road? She didn't. They are no roads in the kitchen.

what do you call a middle eastern man on a plane? a passenger.

Women's rights.

Person1: Why did the chicken cross the road? Person2: I dunno.-. to get to the other side? Person1: :( I dream of a better tomorrow where a chicken can cross the street without having his motives questioned

hi my name is 50 cent my mom swallowd 2 quarters befor i was born dsthgiudghyudgfuawyg

Why did the bartender kick out the three jews at midnight? Because the bar closes at 11.

Abe Lincholn had a son :) But he died |:

Mr. Burns sex scandal.

Why did Timmy fall off the swings? -Because he had no arms Knock knock! Who's there? Not Timmy

why did the farmer cry after a phone call? he just found out his wife just died of lung cancer

Roses are grey, Violets are grey. I'm colour blind, It's a very depressing situation.

Why can't Hank drive? Hank is a stone.

What's the difference between a dead baby and a ferrari? One is a sports car and the other is a baby that is not alive.

Sudden Infant Death Syndrome.

What did T Pain say to the skipper of his yacht? I'm on a yacht

Whats the difference between a dead baby and a chevrolet? I've never been inside a chevrolet before...

What did timmy fall off the swings? He had no arms

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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