I raped someone in my basement... ...Just Kidding!... ...I dont have a basement

A man walks into a bar. His friend follows him in, but the first man doesn't know he's there. They both order a beer, then a couple strong shots. The first man then notices his friend, and they exchange high-fives. The man's friend says, "Hey, how ya doin?" The first man says, "Okay, I guess, but I forgot the punchline." So the second man orders his friend the strongest drink, and the weakest. He replies, "Me too, Joe. Meeeeee, too."

A blond, a brunette, and a red-head are standing on the edge of a cliff. They then realize how dangerous that is and proceed to back away and view the canyon at a safe distance.

What did the orphan boy get for his birthday? The extermination of his race.

What's worse than stubbing your toe? playing spin the bottle with your mom

What is the best time to go to the dentist? During office hours 2 or 3 times a year to ensure optimal dental health and hygiene .

Knock Knock! Who's there? So. So who? Cares.

as i unscrewed my belly button and suddenly my butt fell off

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

Knock Knock Who's there? A Kid With ADD A Kid With AD- Oh Look! A Squirrel!

Knock Knock Who's there? Cancer

Potato

A child with cancer grows up.

A little boy started choking on a condom. His father came and was in a great panic. "Please don't leave me. I don't want to lose you!" he cried over and over again. Then his wife came in and said "it's alright darling, there's plenty more in the drawer". "Oh, thank God for that, I thought I lost it there!" dad replied.

whats da difference between a black people and grass. there both black except for the grass.

what does brb mean? ...be right back? ...ok hurry i need to know the answer.

Your everything I've ever dreamed of you sing like a bird your gorgeous your funny your friendly your sensitive your caring your unique and one day I will kill you.

why couldent Hellen Keller drive? Because shes a woman.

Q: What do you call a dyslexic Irish man with no legs? A: Handicapped

what do black men and vending machines have in common? neithier work and they both steal your money

What do you call a muslim behind the controls of an airliner? A pilot you rascist.

Why'd the chicken cross the road? Why? To get to the gay guys house. Knock Knock! Who's there? The chicken.

Why was Six afraid of Seven? Seven was in a horrible car accident recently and became very disfigured. He didn't tell Six, so the initial shock of seeing him for the first time was quite jarring for Six. Seven has had multiple surgeries since and, once the swelling recedes, he should look much better. It will still hurt for him to chew though.

what did the 3 hispanic men say to the fat guy? you're in our seats

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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