How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? 452

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Why did little jennifer shit herself? Because she fell over.

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Two gay men walked into a bar in a bigoted, small-minded town and were beaten to death with shoes.

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larry clark i smoke pot and im gay its phillup

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Yo momma so thin, she admitted herself into an in-patient counseling center for anorexic and bulimic patients.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was a woman...

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hey bill!

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A seal walks into a club...and is taken in custody by animal control due to the club having a no animal policy.

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What's Donald Trump's favorite color?

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A man comes home early from work to find that his wife is in bed with another man, startled by his presence the wife quickly utters 'it's not what it looks like", the husband however, disregards this comment and later files for a divorce

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A blonde is running for her life and sees a sign that says "GO LEFT TO SURVIVE". She goes right and she survives.

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Knock-knock. Who's there? Doorbell repairman

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How do you catch a unique rabbit? You could probably find many of them in the vicinity of Chernobyl. The radiation has probably created thousands of mutations. They are probably not as fast as regular rabbits.

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What do you call a car with no wheels or engine? Immobile

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What do A Canary and a Groundhog have in common? Nothing, Groundhogs can fly, and Canaries can't dig.

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Did you hear about the 2 guys who wanted to go to rome? They didnt go

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Having lost his job, wife, and general sanity, he resorted to suicide by car accident.

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Why did I get raped

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wat did the candle say to the lighter? nothing candles cant speak because they are inamimate objects, even so i think a candle would just scream anyway, would you buy a screaming candle?

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Q) what's black and white and red all over? A) a slaughtered zebra.

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Knock knock Whos there? FUS ROH DAH

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why did billy drop his ice cream? he got hit by a plane that a loaf of bread was driving

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what does the sloth say to dylan sedgwick nothing dylan is the sloth

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Why wasn't the turkey hungry on thanksgiving? Because it was dead!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops