A priest, a rabbi, and a whale sit down at a bar. The priest says to the bartender, "Jesus Christ is our savior." The rabbi responds, "No. Our savior has not yet been born." To which the whale adds, "MMMUUURRRAAAAAAOOOUUU!!!"

What do you say to a very ambitious dyslexic child? You're ambition is inspiring and I encourage you to follow your dreams. Some of the worlds greatest people, including Albert Einstein, Thomas Edison, and Winston Churchill were dyslexic. Your drive is much bigger than your disorder.

What do you get if you cross James Bond with Osama bin Laden? James bin Laden.

*Ring* *Ring* Bartender : Hello? Stranger:Is Mike Hunt their? Bartender: Mike Hunt! Is Mike Hunt here?! Mike Hunt: Oh thank god! I've been anticipating this phone call for a while now! I've been stranded here for hours and my wife's been killed and the killer is still out there!

What is blue and smells like red paint, Blue Paint

Whats worse than 3 black guys. 4 black guys.

what did Santa Claus say to Nikki Minaj? I really admire your musical talents

This is Jeff and I gots to take a HUGE SHIT. I bet its gonna be smelly and runny. After I wipe I'm gonna lick it and taste it. I bet it tastes GOOD. I hope it has a lil blood in it too.

George Michael walks into a bathrom.....

how do you fall off a building? you trip.

Why did the frog fall out the tree it was dead. Why did the second frog fall out the tree it was stapled to the first frog. Why did the third frog fall from to the tree peer pressure. Why did the fourth frog fall from the tree the third frog was his son. Why did the fifth frog fall from the tree he thought it was a game. Why did the sixth frog fall from the tree he shared the same body with the fifth frog

R.I.P Ryan Dunn.

Out of all the sadness and death in the world...do you know what the worst part is? Mexicans are still hoping the border...

Whats brown and sticky? Anal sex

Why did the chicken cross the road The light was green

What do you get when you mix your mom and your dad? YOU!!!

Thanks

Humpdy dumpty sat on a wall and enjoyed his day off

What's the difference between my car and a pile of dead babies? You can't eat my car.

A horse walked into a bar. Animal control was immediately called and the horse was returned to it's original owner.

what did the little girl with no arms or legs get for her birthday? a bike.

What's worse than 1000 babies tied to a tree? 1 baby tied to 1000 trees.

Hey, we're both lawyers.

Adam gives a new view of roid rage

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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