Why wasn't the turkey hungry on thanksgiving? Because it was dead!

thumb_up thumb_down -27

How did the chicken cross the road? Chickens live in farms, they don't cross roads.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Knock, Knock. I have no door.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

why was the woman making a sandwich in the kitchen? because at the age of 3 she faced the hard reality of being nothing more in life then serving her husband to the day she die

thumb_up thumb_down -33

what do lions and potatoes have in common? They each drive a sports car, wait neither the lion nor the potato drive a sports car. Sorry to waste your time with this joke that seemed to not really have a meaning or a clever punchline.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

How big is kevins Dick? Idk ask his mom!

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Why did the blonde put lysol in the soup? to kill her husband

thumb_up thumb_down -35

What do you tell the woman with two black eyes? Nothing. You already told her twice.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Why is evan a lil poop? cause he pooped my poop all the pooping ;)

thumb_up thumb_down -43

Q: What did the twin tower say to the other twin tower? A: I'm falling for you.

thumb_up thumb_down -55

Why did the homeless man get skin cancer Because he didn't have a home so the Suns rays had been directed towards him For 3 years and he was to poor to purchase Sun screen

thumb_up thumb_down -73

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

thumb_up thumb_down +58

I have glasses but cannot see I have feet but cannot walk What am I? A riddle.

thumb_up thumb_down +52

What is the difference between Santa, and a Jew? Santa goes DOWN the chimney

thumb_up thumb_down +52

Why was the little boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

Roses are red, Violets are blue, What are you doing, I'm ithyphallophobic.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

I used to not like my beard, but then it grew on me.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

When I'm sad I cut myself... another slice of cheesecake.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

want to hear a joke? so a guy comes into a bar, wait no it was a horse so a guy comes into a horse,,,

thumb_up thumb_down +46

knock knock. Who's there? Jehovah's witness. *Door Locks*

thumb_up thumb_down +46

Why did the girl fall off the swings? Because she has no arms Why can't she get back up? Because she has no legs Why won't anyone help her up? Because she's a woman.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

Why did the jew tie his shoes? because his shoes were untied

thumb_up thumb_down +44

What's a small person? A midget

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Why does no one we talk about Nagasaki, they got bombed too...

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops