why did the black child get sent to child services? because he has an abusive father and an alcoholic mother

Why was the little boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

knock knock. Who's there? Jehovah's witness. *Door Locks*

What's a small person? A midget

Why did the Mexican guy run to the hospital? Because it was faster than walking.

The priest, rabbi and Lady Gaga walk into a bar. Lady Gaga performs on stage, while the priest and rabbi listen.

Two goldfish are sat in a tank, one says to the other 'I forgot who you are' to which the other replies 'I forgot what you said'.

What did the bartender say to the bugatti owner? "Don't drink and drive"

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot had a seizure.

Bye, Ax... Nerochan, you just gonna leave me in this state? I mean wont you stop it? I know hypnosis and all but I mean I have like black belt in hypnosis but since you began it, I do not really want to stop it.

Yo mom's so fat, she's overweight !

24!

"Why did the chicken cross the-" "Gosh! Why can't we just live in a world where a chicken can simply cross the road without being questioned about it's motives?!?!" ~McKenna<3

The Irish man was sober.

Why did the addict choke himself with a trash bag? His family couldn't afford a funeral and it was the quickest way to disappear.

What do you call an asian guy in a police uniform? A police officer.

A termite walks into the pub and says "Is the bar tender here?"

Why did the mom go to jail? She committed infanticide. lol.

How much does a polar bear weigh? The average male weights approximately 1150lbs.

What happened to the adventurer ? He took an arrow to the knee and became a guard.

Why did the child step on a ball?

Potato.

if a kayak was stuck in a tree with its headlights on, how many pancakes stacked will it take to get to the moon? none because snakes dont have armpits

What's worse than finding your dad's wedding ring while fingering your sister ? 3 bee stings.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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