So, I was eating out this girl Until I tasted something like horse semen. So I looked up at her and said; " Ah grandma, so that's how you died ! ".

Friends are like potatoes. If you eat them they die.

Blarg

whats worse than not getting what you want for christmas? a child melester

What's black and hangs from a tree? A tire swing.

Your mom is so fat because she ate her emotions when your dad walked out, not to mention her history of bulimia as a teenager.

why is liam baldy because his dad is too

why did the chicken cross the road? it was in my sandwich and i'm late for class.

What happened to the man that jump out of the airplane with no parachute? He landed on a baby and both died almost instantly. The authorities were called and they took care of the situation flawlessly.

What is your favorite joke? I like bar jokes. Okay knock knock Who's there? A bartender A bartender who? A bartender walks into a bar but before he went through the door, he decided to knock on the door because this lame joke is so random.

Video Games

What did the skeleton say to the man? Nothing.

whats the difference between a rapist and a pedophile? the racist has his own whistle

I saw a chameleon. Then it died

how many prostitutes does it take to fix a lightbulb? it depends how much you pay them

What do you call a really dumb girl with downs? Ashley Howard

there are 2 sausages in a pan. one sausage says "wow it's hot in here" and the other sausage says "MY GOD A TALKING SAUSAGE!!!!"

What's funnier than throwing a baby off a cliff? Catching it with a pitch-fork

Abe Lincoln, George Washington, George Bush and Barack Obama are sitting at a table at a bar. They all realize that none of them know each other, wonder when in time they are, have mental breakdowns, and run screaming into the night.

Q: When is the best date to walk out your door in New York? A: 9/11

Why was the black man running away from the cops? He was running a relay race.

Q;what do you call a fish with two knees and personally HANDS out JOBS A: a blowfish

Your mom's so fat that she went in to get liposuction and subsequently died from infection.

A Priest and A Rabbi Walk Into The Bar. Ouch.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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