Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have Tourette's, Cheese on toast.

What three letters alter boys into men and girls into women? The letter containing their bank card, the letter containing their national insurance card and the letter accepting them into a job or higher education placement.

¿melano?

There once was a man in Peru, Who dreamt he was eating his shoe. He was promptly taken to the hospital but died from infection.

This is probably how President Obama proposed to his wife. "I don't wanna be Obama self"

What does AIDS smell like? AIDS has no smell. AIDS is a diease contracted though sexual contact with another being with the diease. It greatly increases the risk of infections and malignancy. Although AIDS has no smell, in the final stages large sores develope on the surface of the skin. This means you are going to die. Thus, HIV/AIDS has no smell.

Listen Nero, lol "listen", anyway, you seem pretty quick to take the blame for my mistakes here, I mean sigh... ...I would never send anyone to harass anyone, but then again I should never allowed them to join in the first place, how bad is that eye doing by the way? I am deeply sorry, I never meant for anything like this to happen. I am eating as I write, I mean I am still scared, I would not blame you if you still keep burning anger towards me.

did you hear about the guy who lost his left arm and left leg? hes all right now

What's worse than a midlife crisis? Having an affair with the dog.

A Banana wrote this...

Q. What does a rock and a bird have in common? A. Everything. Except a bird can fly and has wings and can breath and eats and makes babies...

What is wrong with this phrase? The next line is false. The first line is true. Answer: llamas

Three blokes walk into a bar. I'm british.

Q.Why did the chicken cross the road? A.forty-two

What did the scientist have to say about religion when he was asked by a local reporter? He said that it is a cultural system that creates powerful and long-lasting meaning, by establishing symbols that relate humanity to truths and values.

How old is victor? Old

whats beter than a dead pile of babies? the alive one that has to eat its way out

How do you make Sasuke cry? Kill his family

whats worse than the holocaust? 2 holocausts

Mitt Romney.

What do you call a black man flying a plane. A pilot.

What do you get when mix an orange with juice? Orange juice.

Why didn't Jim go to the party? He wasn''t invited.

I farted once. Haiti took the brunt of it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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