if a kayak was stuck in a tree with its headlights on, how many pancakes stacked will it take to get to the moon? none because snakes dont have armpits

thumb_up thumb_down +34

How did th-A fridge.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No. Ask me if I'm a bush. Are you a bush? No.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Waseem is not a funny guy!

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Q: What's a Mexican's favorite sport? A: Cross Country

thumb_up thumb_down +32

why did the boy named rylie white get aids Because he had unprotected sex with someone with aids.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Why was the man afraid of the pack of wolves? The man was blind and heard his stomach growling even though he had just eaten two buckets of KFC.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Q. On a scale of 1-100, how immature are you? A. 69.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Knock Knock. Come in.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

A young Asian boy got a B on his test. He went home an showed his parents even though he was nervous of their reaction. They told him that a B was a good grade and put it on the fridge. After that he began to gradually flunk each class one by one because of his parent's inability to push him to be better. He is now homeless and an alcoholic.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

If there's a clown in a blender, how do you get him out? Tostitos.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Roses are red, Sometimes they're thorny, When I'm around you, I get kind of Horny

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because, the Farmer had treated the Chicken and the rest of his family with great distaste, thus angering the Chicken to the point of rebellion against the Farmer with hopes of inspiring the other abused farm animals to act likewise.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

what do you call a man that just got brutally murdered? i don't know, check his birth certificate.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get surgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What's Pink And Fluffy? Pink Fluff.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why did Michael Jackson go to McDonald's? Because he was hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What's the difference between Justin Bieber and a gay guy? They're both gay

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Romney 2012

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why are you reading this? You should be taking a shower, you smell like crap.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What has 4 eyes but can't see? A blind man wearing glasses.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

The awkward moment when a joke doesn't end the way you think it dinosaur.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

person 1: Did you hear about the black man that went to college? Person 2: no i haven't Person 1: either have I What's ironic is that they are both black

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops