JEWS

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your mamas so fat her weight is 3.14 without the decimal

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What's more addicting than a good book? Meth

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What is blue and smells like red paint, Blue Paint

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Why was the black man escorted out of the bar? Civil rights is still a real issue in this country and must be solved.

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Why does your mother not love you anymore? Because she was in a tragic car accident 5 years ago and is now deceased and is therefore incapable of love.

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What do Michael Jackson and Whitney Houston have in common? They were both great singers.

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whats worse than not getting what you want for christmas? a child melester

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What did the black cat say to the tabby cat?? Meow

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Facebook...

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Knock knock. Who's there? It's the police. Your father's been taken to county jail for his third DUI.

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What did the skeleton say to the man? Nothing.

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whats an orphans favorite memory? Not one with his/her parents! PWNED TO ALL YOU ORPHANS OUT THURRRRR!!!!

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How do you kill a polar bear? You melt the polar ice caps and take a rope and choke it till it is out cold. You then put a plastic bag over its head and throw it in the water.

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Geuss what? Bob is wide awake and he likes strawberries but he didn't have any strawberries so he ate a hamburger but fred wanted a hamburger but bob ate it so he just ate bob but bob was wide awake so he saw fred eating him so he called the pigs to come and eat fred because pigs eat anything but the pigs had already eaten their daily freds so they ate bob because they hadn't already eaten their daily bob but fred had already eaten bob so they got angry at fred so they just ate him anyway but then they got fat so a wolf ate them but then some hunters killed the wolf and ate it so they are actually eating a hamburger because the wolf ate the pigs and the pigs ate fred and fred ate bob and bobb ate a hambuger but he actually likes strawberries.

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A guy walks in to a bar and says "ow"

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

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What did the mute say to his friend? Nothing.

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Blarg

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Knock Knock Whose there? Get out of the bathroom Get out of the bathroom who? No, your in the bathroom

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What's the difference between a computer and a television?

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Q-How do you kill an elephant? A- An elephant gun Q- How do you kill a blue elephant? A- A blue elephant gun Q- How do you kill a red elephant? A- Strangle it until it turns blue then use a blue elephant gune Q- How do you kill a purple elephant?

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What's worse than standing in line at Walmart? Being raped. What's worse than paying an outrageous amount for whatever it is you bought at Walmart? Being pregnant with a rape baby.

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Where did the Welsh man work? At an office complex.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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