Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was being herded into a slaughter house to be killed, then packaged and shipped out to restaurant venders all across the country.

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Two fish were in a tank one said...."ill drive!"

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What do you call a man with no arms and legs in the ocean? Dead.

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People tell me im insane. Its all a conspiracy.

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On a scale of 1 to Chris Brown, how mad would you be if i ate your golfish? Very angry, as my goldfish is not food.

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Facebook...

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Q: how do you get a girl with one arm to fall out a tree? Wave and wait for her to wave back.

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Snooki want smoosh smoosh

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What's worse than standing in line at Walmart? Being raped. What's worse than paying an outrageous amount for whatever it is you bought at Walmart? Being pregnant with a rape baby.

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What's funnier than throwing a baby off a cliff? Catching it with a pitch-fork

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What's worse than 1000 babies tied to a tree? 1 baby tied to 1000 trees.

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Why? Because!

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What did the dog say to the dildo? Your rubber

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Nero, I understand, what I thought was correct, was to teach people to understand those exact words that you are conveying. Its not that, I am afraid of showing the world the man that I am. But rather that I am not a man, I admire your vision, and tried to follow it, as we got much in, common, I can think as an individual and still admire your work. But you know how society is built, if too many find out I am a woman, then that not only reveals that I have been lying to them, which I have, but also that well, women are not exactly seen as equals, I know I never was, all people ever saw in me was "a great pair of tits".

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The penn state football administration

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What happens when a man and a woman really love each other?... - They'll most likely go on a date and enjoy themselves.

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This is probably how President Obama proposed to his wife. "I don't wanna be Obama self"

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Your mother is so fat, that the doctor said, "Go on a diet or you will get a Cardiac Infarction."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? No particular reason. It probably wasn't even aware the the ground it was crossing is what's termed as a road.

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Roses are yellow Violets are also yellow Please don't stereotype again

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Two cows are in a field one cow says moo the other cow say shit thats what i was gonna say

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Who am I? Your name is Harvey Jackson. Let's get you dressed so we can go downstairs for dinner. Nurse Holland will be helping you in a few moments.

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why am i on this site? cause its funny

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What happened when a terrorist puts a bomb in a hospital? Everyone dies cause it was a hospital for crippled people

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops