You must be Jamaican cause you have long dreadlocks and you are listening to Bob Marley

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Why did the monkey follow the tree? Because it was dead.

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What did the man say when he was having sex with his wife? Nothing. It turns out it wasn't his wife, he was cheating on her with his mistress, the woman he was having sex with now, thus destroying their marriage.

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Justin Beiber and a speaker = no hearing within a 25 mile area

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What do you call a horse with out ears? A horse with out ears?

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why was the woman making a sandwich in the kitchen? because at the age of 3 she faced the hard reality of being nothing more in life then serving her husband to the day she die

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Hey Nerochan, how high is your IQ?

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Why did the blonde put lysol in the soup? to kill her husband

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How do you flatten a worm? Feed it to a little boy, and then drop a refrigerator on him.

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Whats worse then this joke? Its punchline.

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why was the old woman angry? fig pudding.

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Why did bob die Cause he got hit by a mailbox

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Want to hear a joke about my penis? Nevermind it's too long.

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A ninja walks into a bar the bartender asks "what would you like?" The ninja says "i'll have two green eyes" the bartender says "we dont have green eyes this is america" so the ninja is so mad that he goes home and brutally beats his wife with a spatula.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The Police. *No Answer* The Police then give the S.W.A.T team the signal, and bust down the door and kill 15 high profile targets issued by Liberia. The man who did not answer the door is Carlos Pedrojeuz, a serial killer, meth addict who has been a part of the sex slave trade for a decade. One might think of answering the door next time.

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Q:Why did the black man shoot the white man? A:The black man happened to be extremely good at paintball.

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Roses are red. Violets are red. Tulips are red. My garden is on fire.

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Why was the little boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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I used to not like my beard, but then it grew on me.

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What do you do when life gives you lemons? Life is an abstract object incapable of handing out gifts, thus if given a lemon by life you should go to a doctor to make sure you don't have an undiagnosed disease.

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want to hear a joke? so a guy comes into a bar, wait no it was a horse so a guy comes into a horse,,,

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what happened to the autistic child that traveled to antarctica? he died.

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What did Helen Keller get for Christmas? A read along book

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Q: What is a duck's favorite thing to smoke? A: Quack

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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