Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

A baby seal walks into a club...

Doctor: Knock knock... Patient: Who's there? Doctor: Interrupting doctor... Patient: Interrupting doct-- Doctor: You have cancer.

What did the girl with AIDs receive for her birthday? Unprotected sex

Humpdy dumpty sat on a wall and enjoyed his day off

What do Michael Jackson and Whitney Houston have in common? They were both great singers.

Want to hear a tough toung twister? spoons

Q: Why did the singer stop singing? A: Someone threw a car at her face.

: Did you hear about the Polish Helicopter crash? The pilot and three passengers died.

What is better than winning the gold medal at the Special Olympics? Not being retarded

why did the chicken cross the road? it was in my sandwich and i'm late for class.

why was the man masturbating? his wife needed a break

What did the left nut say to the right nut? Nothing

This message is boring. There is no joke. There is no punchline. You can stop reading now.

why is liam baldy because his dad is too

A man and woman was sitting at a bar. The man bought the woman a roofied drink and she has never been seen again.

A Black man and an Asian man are at a bar. They have a few drinks and then leave.

A man walks into a bar. We see him as he approaches the register wearing a dark hoody. The surveillance camera seen here catches a glimpse of the man's face appearing to be a white male with mustache and beard. As you can see the man opens the register and takes the money before the bartender can get to him. If you have any information about this crime please call crime stoppers at 1-800-GET-HELP. In other news, the DOW JONES reached a record high today as investors in China begin working on keeping the economy from plundering.

What's worse than 1000 babies tied to a tree? 1 baby tied to 1000 trees.

Q-How do you kill an elephant? A- An elephant gun Q- How do you kill a blue elephant? A- A blue elephant gun Q- How do you kill a red elephant? A- Strangle it until it turns blue then use a blue elephant gune Q- How do you kill a purple elephant?

Blarg

why?

My butt!!!!!!!!

Knock knock. Who's there? It's the police. Your father's been taken to county jail for his third DUI.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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