Yo mamma's handwriting is so bad that its barely legible to most people!

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Whats red and eats like dog? A fox.

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hi

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Q - what did one plate say to the other? A - FOods on me tonight!

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What did one potato say to the other. Let's get baked!( hope u dont mind that this isnt a anti-joke well i dont know what it is so sue me)

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What do you call a drunk irishman? A cab.

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Knock Knock *no answer* Knock Knock *Genevieve enters the house with curiosity and is later charged with Breaking and Entering*

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A Japanese woman walks into a Korean deli, and asks the Korean man if she can buy some groceries. They are able to get past their cultural differences, and share their favorite recipes.

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What do you do when a blond ask you a question? Answer politely and thank her for her wonderful question.

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Q: whats worse than getting aids? A: Giving your mom aids.

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Chuck Norris' cheese

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nine...eleven

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Two guys walk into the woods an saw a naked lady.One guys ran away. When his friend met up with him he ask why did u run away. He siad "my mom said if i a naked lady that i would turn to stone and i felt myself getting hard."

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What do you call a bunch of Mexicans on fire? Jumping Beans.

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Why was the boy sad? He had just been in a terrible car accident in which he witnessed his entire family die painful, violent deaths, thus he suffered survivor's guilt. Also he dropped his ice cream.

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Q: What's black and blue and hates sex? A: The 8-year-old boy tied up in my garage.

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A black person and a hispanic person are in a car, who is driving? The black person, after all it's his car.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's blind. Also, she's been dead for 43 years.

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whats retarded and looks like a fat duck? GEorge goodburn

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Why was the man with cancer bald? He wanted to tan his scalp.

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What is the difference between a doorknob? Toast.

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Gabe Mercado

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This night was a stormy one, alot was destroyed, but the spirit of Little Jonny Harrison lived on with a shining light so strong it could blind some. Jonny lived in a village atop a hill. Citizens were frightened for their lives, all but Jonny. He was bullied from the age of 3 months, by his Uncle Clive, who was a Catholic Priest. Fear in the eyes of the normal residents, whilst, in Jonny's heart, there glowed a glow of pure hope and confidence, Jonny Harrison, was going into the storm. Jonny knew he could amount to something, if he really really tried. He has 6 years behind him, and a long life ahead, and he figured, what's the worst that could happen? He said to himself, there will be nothing worse out there than Uncle Clive's Magical Basement. Jonny sat his mother down, looked her in the eye and whispered farewell. He wished his father the best wishes possible. Finally, Rosie, Jonny's sweet old Grandmother, who had been addicted to Meth for about 25 years now and been through 13 interventions and countless suicide attempts, opened her ears to young Jonny's speech, he said softly in her ear, the words, "Hang in there, Gran. I know you can pull through, I may be only six but I sure as heck know how much i care for you.". The words of love echoed in her ears as Jonny walked away. He took with him a carton of Ribena and his lucky medal and took his first step outside. He took the carton of Ribena, crumpled it up, spraying fruit juice on his dungarees, and threw it to the wet grass. He faced the towering lightning cloud and shouted, "Nothing will stop me!". Jonny died shortly after of AIDS. His Uncle Clive was sentence to 5 years in prison for child molestation and consistant child abuse. Rosie Harrison died later that day.

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What does a farmer say when he can't find his tractor? - Where's my tractor?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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