What did Hitler say to his men before they got in the tanks? Get in the tanks

What is a man with no arms and no legs on a pile of leaves? A quadriplegic who enjoys the fall.

Stevie Wonder has put on a lot of weight since the 70's. I feel really bad for him because he can't watch what he eats.

Whats yellow and cant swim? A bulldozer.

What do you call a kid with no arms, no legs, and an eyepatch? Names.

KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called antee joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

What's the diffrents beetween a carrot and a dead baby? One I like to eat in my soup, the other one s a carrot.

AHAHAHAHAHA XD I cant for the life of me imagine Donald Duck accusing anyone of being a seducer XD, my eyes are tearing up XD If I do not type anything more, its because I died of laughter and joy XD But those "cartoons" where made for adults, ever seen steamboat Willie? That is one of my favorites, I always liked Mickey Mouse a bit better, Donald kinda changed a lot.

what red black and white al over? a t.v I was kidding about the red part

Why did Michael Jackson go to McDonald's? Because he was hungry.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was suicidal.

Anti jokes gives me cold sores

What's after 9/11? 9/12

If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because once it had inadvertently escaped the farm it was being kept on it was startled and with no concept of road and pavement happened to traverse a road, with no real motive.

What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas Mittens

Why was the little boy crying? He had a frog stapled to his face.

hi my name is 50 cent my mom swallowd 2 quarters befor i was born dsthgiudghyudgfuawyg

how do you get a taco? Buy one!

Do you want to hear the best joke ever? Me too!

Roses are red Violets are blue im a retard dictionary

Kenneth kaniff takes his hat off then he meets cosmic panda with kevin the zebra because chuck norris ate a chili pepper.

What did one gorilla say to the other? Urgh.

The awkward moment when a joke doesn't end the way you think it dinosaur.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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