What did Hitler say to his men before they got in the tanks? Get in the tanks

Knock knock. Who's there? John John who John

what did the train say to the other train choo chooo

Where's my tractor?

what did the black man say to the white man? hi

Q. On a scale of 1-100, how immature are you? A. 69.

so there are two muffins. no wait there are three muffins in an oven. actually it was a toaster oven. and they were covered in butter. uuuuuuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhh cheese on toast anyone?

A seven year-old boy was jumping on a trampoline. He landed awkwardly and broke his ankle. This then became infected and caused him to be permenantly paralysed.

Whats yellow and cant swim? A bulldozer.

What's dead? Your mum.

How do you wake up Lady GAGA? A sludge hammer!

AHAHAHAHAHA XD I cant for the life of me imagine Donald Duck accusing anyone of being a seducer XD, my eyes are tearing up XD If I do not type anything more, its because I died of laughter and joy XD But those "cartoons" where made for adults, ever seen steamboat Willie? That is one of my favorites, I always liked Mickey Mouse a bit better, Donald kinda changed a lot.

What do you call a black man riding a bike? Alan. He's studying environmental engineering at NYU.

OMG this totally works! Step 1: Hold your breath Step 2: Die

Knock knock Who's there? 7. And if that's you in there, 6, you better start praying.

If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

A man goes to a doctor to check about an itch on his testicles. Turns out it was just a rash and is promptly prescribed medication and it clears up in a week.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was suicidal.

Whats 9 + 10? 19

Did you hear the story about the divorcee who was concerned about ecology? Her husband had been hitting her. Good for her to get away from that kind of abuse.

A black guy walks into a bar... he sits down and has a drink

Why did the woman cross the road? She didn't. They are no roads in the kitchen.

A man walked into a bar. He ended up in the hospital being treated for a concussion.

why does'nt mexico have an olympic team? because they have a poor economy and have other things to worry about.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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