John: Do you like Cake? Sue: Yes. John: Alright.

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How do you get a clown off a swing Hit it with an axe.

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hi. thats what she said.

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Q: why are black people so good at basketball? A: because the can shoot and steal:)

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Comment is abusive and has been removed.

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I just flew in from New York and boy are my arms tired. I was jerking off during the entire plane ride.

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why did the black man buy a gun? he was a hunter.

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Man who wrote "The Hokey Pokey" died. Hard part was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in and then the trouble started..

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Why did the baby cross the road? It doesn't matter. He was hit by a bus.

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what do babies and prostitutes have in common they will both cry if you hit them with a brick

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Chuck Norris drove to McDonalds and ordered a Whopper. Much to his dismay, McDonalds does not make Whoppers, because that is the signature fast-food burger of McDonald's biggest competitor, Burger King.

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How did Helen Keller meet her husband? On a blind date.

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Why was the little boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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Q: "What's brown and rhymes with Snoop?" A: Dr. Dre

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Not an anti-joke, but an anti-pick-up-line: How much does a polar bear weight? Not as much as you!

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Two goldfish are sat in a tank, one says to the other 'I forgot who you are' to which the other replies 'I forgot what you said'.

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what is white and black and red all over? a half eaten penguin

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Q:Why did the booger cross the street? A:Because everyone was picking on him

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Whats worse than being arrested for a crime you didn't commit? Teenage pregnancy.

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Q: is this the krusty krab? A: No this is patrick!

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A teacher notices one of her students clutching a cat. She asks him why. The boy, tearfully, explains that he heard his father tell his mother that he was going to eat her pussy when the kids left for school. The teacher laughs and, the class being 10-11 years old thereby at an age approaching biological curiosity, decides to mix this in with a sex education video she was planning on showing them a few weeks later. She then phones the boy's parents who come to collect the cat while reassuring the boy that it is in no danger. The cat was popular with the boy's classmates and they would often go to visit him as a result. Many years later, just after the boy started attending university, the cat was put to sleep at the age of 13 due to liver cancer. The boy placed a Facebook post in honour of his feline friend, which was spotted by a former classmate of his in a routine search who happened to be attending the same university. They ended up reacquainting and beginning a sexual relationship, which was how the boy lost his virginity and eventually blossomed into a 37-year marriage resulting in three children.

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Bye, Ax... Nerochan, you just gonna leave me in this state? I mean wont you stop it? I know hypnosis and all but I mean I have like black belt in hypnosis but since you began it, I do not really want to stop it.

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What did the cripple kid get for Christmas? Cancer. You know what he got the next the next Christmas? Nothing he died.

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"Why did the chicken cross the-" "Gosh! Why can't we just live in a world where a chicken can simply cross the road without being questioned about it's motives?!?!" ~McKenna<3

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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