Why was the fish swimming on the water? Oh wait it's dead

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Why did the man drink the milk? Because he was a baby.

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Whats green all over and travels at 100mph A christmas tree in a gokart

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How do you upset a builder? Kill all his family.

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a man walks into a bar it hurt

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What do you do when a blond ask you a question? Answer politely and thank her for her wonderful question.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the voices told him to...

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What do you call a guy who makes jokes about a girl being in the kitchen? Single.

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What do you call a person who is 6 feet under? Lost.

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Q:Whats worse than 100 babies in 1 dumpster? A:1 dead baby is 100 dumpsters.

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A Jew, a Mormon, and an Atheist walk out of a bar. They all get in a car with the Jew driving. They were all deceased do to the fact of a very large car accident. Know your limits. Don't drink and drive!

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There's some good news and some bad news. The bad news is there isn't any good news.

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A young Asian boy got a B on his test. He went home an showed his parents even though he was nervous of their reaction. They told him that a B was a good grade and put it on the fridge. After that he began to gradually flunk each class one by one because of his parent's inability to push him to be better. He is now homeless and an alcoholic.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it was hit by a bus.

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Two muffins are in an oven. It was a really small batch.

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Would you like a better house, car, spouse, and a better life all together? No, no thanks.

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Q: What's the worst part about being a black Jew? A: You have to sit at the back of the oven.

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Why was the boy praying? Because both of his parents had just been brutally murdered in front of him and he was analy defiled by the assailant and left alive to have live with the pain of seeing both of his parents be killed. He had also dropped his lollipop.

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What did the sea say to the sand? Nothing, he just waved.

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A dog walks into a bar and succumbs to heartworm.

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A: Knock! Knock! B: Who's there? A: Kitchen B: Kitchen who? A: GET THERE!

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead......

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What is the biggest lie in the universe? "I have read and agree to the Terms of Service"

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Roses are red,Lemons are sour,Open your legs and give me an hour

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops