What's worse than a midlife crisis? Having an affair with the dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did Helen Keller say to a stranger at a party? I earned a Bachelor of Arts degree, wrote several books, traveled to over 39 countries, and was awarded the Presidential Medal of Freedom, one of the United States' highest two civilian honors, from President Lyndon B. Johnson.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Im Jackson Sinclair and Me and Carter Weeks-69;)

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Mitt Romney.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Do Minnesotans have accents? Oh ya, you betchya.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the fat guy get a gun? Because he was tired of all the fat jokes...

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Dancing Potatoe!

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why didn't Timothy wish his dad a Happy Father's Day? His dad died yesterday in a car accident.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What do you do if a blond throw a grenade at you? Take the pin out and throw it back

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How did the priest die? Masterbation

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What does a farmer say when he can't find his tractor? - Where's my tractor?

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why was the man with cancer bald? He wanted to tan his scalp.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A traveler gets a flat tire on an old farm road. He goes to the door of the neasrest farm and knocks. The farmer and his beautiful 21 year old daughter answer the door. Traveler: "I'm sorry, but I have a flat. Is there any place I can stay until I get it repaired?" Farmer: "Why yes. Our church sponsors a homeless shelter and rehab center down the road.I can give you a ride there if you like?"

thumb_up thumb_down -3

My neighbor's kid was running around yelling magical spells. I said "Wow, you really want to be like Harry Potter, don't you?". He said "Yes!". So, I killed his parents and locked him under the stairs.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw them

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the voices told him to...

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Do you really want to know what i shit? Poo

thumb_up thumb_down -5

5

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Where's my shotgun

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why are these jokes so funny? Because they're NOT!

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What is the difference between a dog being hit by a car and an Arab being hit by a car? There are skidmarks before the dog

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A: Knock! Knock! B: Who's there? A: Kitchen B: Kitchen who? A: GET THERE!

thumb_up thumb_down -7

I saw a shovel once.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Girls Basketball.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops