I went to the zoo yesterday. There was only one dog, it was a shitzu

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Two men walk into a bar, the third one ducks.

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what do u call a girl with cancer? bald.

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Ask me if you can see my dinosaur. Can I see your dinosaur? No dinosaurs don't exist sillyhead!

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A muslim gets on a plane. He is then flown to his destination.

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knock knock whose there? it's me, Connie oh hi Connie, wont you come in? oh i was just wandering if i could borrow your scotch tape ofcourse! one moment please. no problem. say, hows phil been? oh he's great, he just got a new job! here's your scotch tape! thank you so much! ....................... what a perfect scene. It is very unfortunate, though, for as Connie walked away from the family whom she borrowed the tape from, a car came by and with a single strike, killed her. this proves that nothing is perfect.

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Two dogs walk into a room. What a fine example of two dogs walking into a room.

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Her lips aren't proportionally fit to her face

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Two boys are playing with a toy submarine. One isists it will work in a real test. The boy drowns and the company is sued.

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A terrorist walks into a bar and shoots the bartender.

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No. Yes.

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Why is the women in the street selling her body for money? because she has 3 kids and a father with cancer.

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Ha

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Poop

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Your mom is so ugly she plans on using you college funds for getting plastic surgery

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How did the asian woman's car get totaled She was hit by a drunk driver

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roses are red, violets are red, my garden is on fire

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What do a ginger kid get for christmas ? it dusen't matter... gingers don't have souls.

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How do you confuse a blond? Ask her to solve ( [3x - 3x^2 +1]^744 ) x ( [- 3x + 3x^2 +1]^745 )

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What's black and white and red all over? A nun in a blender.

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do you know what i see in the perfect girl? my dick.

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On the first day of Christmas my true love gave to me, AIDS

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Q: What did one tube of glue say to the other tube of glue? A:Nothing. They're tubes of glue. Inanimate objects, such as a tube of glue, however adhesive the contents of said object is, are not capable of advanced speech, let alone basic communication.

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? Marijuana

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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