Tom Petty walks into a bar and the bartender says, "I'm sorry, you are visibly intoxicated. We cannot sell you liquor." The bar explodes because someone said no to Tom Petty.

: Did you hear about the Polish Helicopter crash? The pilot and three passengers died.

why did the black boy fall? he had terminal cancer and couldnt stand the pain anymore he died

How do you confuse a Mexican? several large eggs

What did the black kid get for Christmas? Marijuana

What do millions of men give their girlfriends every Christmas? AIDS.

Why is the women in the street selling her body for money? because she has 3 kids and a father with cancer.

A- Knock Knock B- Who's there? A- Soccer!

What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in an oven.

On the first day of Christmas my true love gave to me, AIDS

What does an Asian man, Black man, & a Hick all have in common with automatic weapons? The Asian is Vietnamese and fought in the Nam, The Black guy lives in the ghetto and was shot in a drive by, and the hick and his best friend got drunk and shot each other in the foot.

Republicans

Snooki want smoosh smoosh

Hey, you want to hear an anti-joke? yeah, sure. .....well, too bad!

A blond and a redhead are walking down the street the red head says look a dead bird the blond looks up

How do you keep children off your lawn? Molest them

What is black and white and red all over the news paper of someone with tuberculosis

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died.

Q: What did one tube of glue say to the other tube of glue? A:Nothing. They're tubes of glue. Inanimate objects, such as a tube of glue, however adhesive the contents of said object is, are not capable of advanced speech, let alone basic communication.

Matty B

how do you wake up lady gaga? scream in her ear.

A grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartender picks up a newspaper and squishes him

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How did Bob fall off the swing? He had no arms. Why couldn't he get up? He had no arms. What did Bob get for Christmas? Cancer.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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