What did the girl say to the boy? I don't know it was a private conversation

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Society.

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What do you call a guy being followed by about 30 others with high powered rifles? A military general serving for his country.

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms or legs in a pool? A: A man with no arms or legs in a pool.

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Why are cemetaries gated? Typically, to prevent vandalism and the emotional trama it inflicts on the deceaseds' families.

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What do you call a gay man who has sex with a woman? A bisexual.

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Why can't Hellen Keller Drive? Because she's dead.

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How do you wake up Lady GAGA? A sludge hammer!

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A grasshopper goes into a bar It is stepped on and crushed.

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What is invisible and smells like bananas? Monkey Farts.

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KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called antee joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

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Why is six afraid of seven? There might've been a little shooting accident a few days ago which put his mother in the ER. If anyone asks go to a bar and think in your head why you would ask something like that. Let it sink in.

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Q: What did Hellen Keller say to the pizza delivery man A: Stop raping me.

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Why was John sad? His parents were murdered.

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George Bush.

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Roses are red, violets are blue and the sun is very hot

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What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas Mittens

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what do you call a man that just got brutally murdered? i don't know, check his birth certificate.

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why was the girl screaming? She was getting raped from behind by her dad.

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How much did the Holla Cost?

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because, the Farmer had treated the Chicken and the rest of his family with great distaste, thus angering the Chicken to the point of rebellion against the Farmer with hopes of inspiring the other abused farm animals to act likewise.

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roses are green violets are red im shooting heroine into my head

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Why did little Suzy fall off the swing? She didn't have arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Suzy.

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Why did Riley cross the road? A: I lied he started to then proceeded to get hit by a bus filled with children causing them all to be scarred for life.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops