Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms

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There was a man from the hood, His limericks weren't very good, So he decided to become a purveyor of monogrammed handkerchiefs and other fine linen products.

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knock knock whose there? it's me, Connie oh hi Connie, wont you come in? oh i was just wandering if i could borrow your scotch tape ofcourse! one moment please. no problem. say, hows phil been? oh he's great, he just got a new job! here's your scotch tape! thank you so much! ....................... what a perfect scene. It is very unfortunate, though, for as Connie walked away from the family whom she borrowed the tape from, a car came by and with a single strike, killed her. this proves that nothing is perfect.

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Why does a snake have eyes? To see!

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as i unscrewed my belly button and suddenly my butt fell off

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no

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Why does Susie fall off the swing? I shot her in the head with a pistol.

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Sarah got hit by a bus.... Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sarah

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Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black. ~Stevie Wonder

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm not good at poems Nice tits

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What's 9+10=? 19

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what happened after 9/11?? 9/12.

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What did the beaver say to the other beaver? Nothing because beavers are wild, indigenous species thus incapable of speech.

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Why can't the blonde dial 911? Because the burglars tied her up and gagged her before they robbed the house and she couldn't do anything until one of the neighbors found her and untied her.

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Why didn't the boy get any presents for christmas ? Because sadly his father is an alcoholic and cant support him nor his family.

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What has two heads and one body Conjoined twins

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42

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how do you fall off a building? you trip.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Segregation

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poo poo you you doo doo too too

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Your mom is so ugly she plans on using you college funds for getting plastic surgery

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So a man walks into a bar, he meets a few friends, has a few beers, and at the end of the night he calls a cab to drive him home

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How do you make a blonde scream? Set her on fire.

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What does ms colot like to eat? Pants

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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