According to standard table etiquette what is rude when someone passes you the salt? Jamming a fork in their eye

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What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

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How do you stop a bus? Throw small children in front of it. Except it didn't work for the boy with ice cream.

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What was the biggest party of 2010? The Democrats.

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A Blonde, a Brunette, and a Red head were on a plane. They never met, and went their separate ways.

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A dyslexic Irishman walks out of a bra.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Tell an Anti-Joke.

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'Knock knock' 'who's there?' 'Whinny the poo' 'Whinny the poo who?' 'Whinny the poo'

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Why does a ginger have no friends? Because it is a non sentient horizontal stem and thus incapable of forming complex social and emotional bonds with conscious organisms.

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John has 38 candy bars. He eats 28. What does he have now? Diabetes. John has Diabetes.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Interupting cow Interu--- MOOOOOO!!

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i eat poop

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What did Helen Keller's parents do when they were displeased with her behavior? They beat the shit out of her.

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What looks like a 50p and has a narrow back?

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a little girl is playing outside of her house when i man in a van approaches her and stops to ask if the girl will help him find his puppy and that he has some gandy. seeing as the girl has a great love for animals she gets in the van. the man and the little girl drive around until they find the puppy. the man is so overjoyed her rewards the girl with candy. he then drives her back to her house and she feels wonderful having helped the man find his puppy. the end.

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What do you call a fish with no "eyes" Dead

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There are 2 cannibals eating a guy well one starts at the head and the other one starts at the feet the one at the head says to the other on how you doing down there and he said ohhh having a ball you!!!!

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A man walks into a bar. He hit his head so hard that he went into a coma.

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What did the sea say to the sand? Nothing, he just waved.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The mailman The mailman who? How dumb are you?

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what do snozberries taste like? Lama

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you're a loser >>>>>>>>>>>

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I can't stand 9/11 jokes Their just plane wrong!

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Womens rights

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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