Contrary to popular statement, "When life hands you lemons, make lemonade," you technically can't do this because of the need for water and sugar to make lemonade. Secondly, life can't technically hand you lemons because life isn't a physical thing that can hand you lemons. So really, you don't even have to worry about the second two ingredients.

what do outgoing girls get on spring break? raped.

Why does Michael J. Fox make the best milkshakes? Because he uses only the finest ingedients.

What do a grape and a plane have in common? They both have wings... except for the grape!

Why cant Roger drive a tractor? Because Roger is a goldfish.

What did the black man get on his SAT's? -Barbecue sauce

So a man walks into a bar, he meets a few friends, has a few beers, and at the end of the night he calls a cab to drive him home

How do you make time fly? Well! You cannot really make time fly. Imean, yeah, iguess it feels like time flies when your having fun, but it moves just as fast as always!

B: Laro tayo . G: Anong laro ? B: Taguan . G: Bakit ngayon pa ? B: Because tonight will be the night that i will fall for you . G: Ulet ? B: Over again . G: Wag na ! B: Don't make me change my mind . G: Bukas na lang . B: I won't live to see another day . G: Weh ? Di nga ? B: I swear its true . G: Bakit kasi taguan pa ? B: Because a girl like you is impossible to find . G: Ano ? B: You're impossible to find . ? :)

What eats dicks for dinner and smells like he just licked an STD infested turtle? Jimmy

What's worse than a truckload of dead babies? Wait a week.

minecraft

How do you make a blonde scream? Set her on fire.

What's yellow and if it gets in your eye, you'll die? a yellow train.

What do people in Asia do for black history month? Nothing, black history month is an American thing.

What did the Ocean say to the Sky? Nothing, it just waved.

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whats worse than not getting what you want for christmas? a child melester

How do you make a fat kid cry? You hold an onion up to their face.

whats worse than the Holocaust....6 million Jews

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What happened when a terrorist puts a bomb in a hospital? Everyone dies cause it was a hospital for crippled people

What do you call a really dumb girl with downs? Ashley Howard

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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