What did the boy with no arms get for christmas? heart worms

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Q: What do you call a dyslexic Irish man with no legs? A: Handicapped

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he, he's blind.

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How do you save someones life? Do not kill them.

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Contrary to popular statement, "When life hands you lemons, make lemonade," you technically can't do this because of the need for water and sugar to make lemonade. Secondly, life can't technically hand you lemons because life isn't a physical thing that can hand you lemons. So really, you don't even have to worry about the second two ingredients.

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What do you call a muslim behind the controls of an airliner? A pilot you rascist.

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whats faster than the speed of light? a jew with a coupon

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What did the homeless man without legs and arms, get for Christmas? ... Cancer

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Three blokes walk into a bar. I'm british.

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So. The gays. ...

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Q: What came first, the chicken or the egg? A: The egg, dinosaurs reproduced long before chickens existed.

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What is the difference between an Irishman and a plank of wood? Almost everything, including anatomy, chemical make up, mass etc

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Yo mama is so fat she went on a diet and lost weight.

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What did the baby with Downs syndrome say to the baby with cancer? Nothing, baby's can't talk

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What did Tarzan say when the monkeys came over the hill? Hey look, the monkeys are coming over the hill.

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How do you make a blonde scream? Set her on fire.

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Your mom is so ugly she plans on using you college funds for getting plastic surgery

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What is blue and smells like red paint, Blue Paint

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: Did you hear about the Polish Helicopter crash? The pilot and three passengers died.

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how do you make a dog roll over you kill it

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This site is easy to upload to...

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because SEVEN-FIVE!!!

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What do you call cheese that isn't your's? Someone else's cheese.

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Your mother is so stupid she never finished College thus having to work many menial jobs to provide for her family.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops