Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was tied to the first one.

thumb_up thumb_down +59

What's worse than losing your phone? Getting raped anal until phones fall out

thumb_up thumb_down +7

The original Superman: Cruelty! Do you remember the original superman color movies? Like when he just deflected lasers bombs fire and bullets, he threw busses, spun around the world, was completely immune to anything but kryptonite and then... (pls dont hate) ...Fell of a horse and became a complete cripple?

thumb_up thumb_down -79

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered sex offender.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was hit by a car.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Why does an elephant lay on it's back with its feet in the air? To trip birds.

thumb_up thumb_down -84

Roses are red, violets are blue something stinks and I think it's you!

thumb_up thumb_down +89

What happens when you have fish and a rhino mate? Nothing, that is physically impossible, a rhino is a lot bigger than a fish and it would not be possible for a rhino to do that with a fish considering a rhino can't breathe under water and a fish can't breath with out air.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

yo mamas so ugly she turned madoosa into stone

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why was Jesus able to walk on water? Because he was the son of God and therefore devine, he can do whatever he pleases

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Why did The chicken cross the road? To get ran over.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What do you call a dead cat on the side of the road? Kitty litter

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's the best anti joke? this one

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did the girl fall out of the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +79

Oh hot damn, this is my jam. Strawberry, to be specific.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Roses are red Dead bodies are blue You can't see me But I see you

thumb_up thumb_down +106

What's as bad as doing something you don't like? Doing another thing you don't like

thumb_up thumb_down +68

What do you call it when 1 person has an imaginary friend? A mental disorder. What do you call it when 1 billion people have an imaginary friend? A Religion.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

what did the therapist say to the other therapist? were both therapists.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Darude - Sandstorm

thumb_up thumb_down +49

Roses are red, I want a gravestone, nobody loves me, forever alone

thumb_up thumb_down +21

A man walks into an anti Joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Your moms so dumb she stuffed a battery up her butt and said i got the POWA!

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Why did the girl fall off of the swing? Why was the swing in the kitchen?

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops