- Anti Joke

How many flies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 2.

what do you call a black pilot? a pilot

The original Superman: Cruelty! Do you remember the original superman color movies? Like when he just deflected lasers bombs fire and bullets, he threw busses, spun around the world, was completely immune to anything but kryptonite and then... (pls dont hate) ...Fell of a horse and became a complete cripple?

Why did the girl fall out of the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

Why are Jewish men circumcised? Because it is the norm with that particular religious group to circumcise male infants shortly after birth.

Why was the man tired at his soccer game? Because he did not sleep well the night before

Why did the girl not have a good New Year's? She was murdered on Christmas.

What begins with "N" and ends with "R" that you never want to call a black person? Your neighbor

German sausage is the wurst

What do you call a group of men terrible at their jobs? The Mets

Hitler had the right ideas, wne tupon it the wrong way.

Why does an elephant lay on it's back with its feet in the air? To trip birds.

What's as bad as doing something you don't like? Doing another thing you don't like

How do you make lady gaga angry? punch her in the face and throw her off a cliff

The Holocaust.

A bass player walks past a bar.......... "hey, it could happen"...

Roses are red, violets are blue something stinks and I think it's you!

Knock Knock Who is there? 9-11 9-11 who? You said you would never forget.

Why was Rosa Parks forced to sit on the back of the bus? All the other seats were taken....

Knock knock! "Who's there?" "It's me, xx" "Okay, come in."

Every day Mr. Robbins, or Big Jim as his friends call him, follows the same routine that he has for the last several years. His days are always typical and very rarely differ or have any excitement thrown in the mix. It usually starts off by him waking up to his wife farting rather loudly, giving off a potent and irritating smell. This happens because she has a certain condition that makes her much more gassy than the normal person, especially as she sleeps. So Big Jim then takes his pillow and throws it at her head. She usually wakes up thinking that he is trying to be playful because of that, even though what follows next has happened every single time for the last few years. He then grabs his pistol out from under where his pillow used to be and then continues to pistol whip her for the annoyance. After bloodying her up a bit he then proceeds to the bathroom to urinate and then cry at his increasingly shrinking penis because of his steroids abuse, which hasn't made him get in shape or become stronger, but rather worsened his already four hundred pound weight to an astonishing four hundred and one pounds. After crying for a while he then brushes his teeth and gets dressed. He goes to work and gets chewed out by his boss every day for his lack of effort and is then threatened to be fired if it does not improve by the end of the month. He is always being chewed out by his boss because he does the absolute minimum he is legally allowed to do at the Woman's Abuse Shelter. But, at the end of the month he is never fired because he threatens to kill his bosses daughter whom he has fresh photos of her most recent farting accident as proof of his promise. Normally someone would go to the police, especially when there is photographic evidence, but unfortunately the police chief is his father, who has an out-dated sense of Male Superiority, and the only detective in their small town suffered a heart attack four months ago. This caused a problem because the body was never disposed of because the only medical examiner died one day prior to that because he tripped over the body of the only doctor at a crime scene and fell off the mountain, killing both him and the only man who knew how to use a telephone in their town as that man tried to grab and save him but was only taken along on the ride. And now no one wants to report any crimes because they do not want to walk into the department because of the smell, and nobody knows how to use a phone because that person died trying to save the life of the only medical examiner who tripped over the body of the only doctor at a crime scene and went tumbling down, leaving the only detective to rot in the department, causing nobody to want to report any crimes because they do not want to walk into the department because of the smell, and nobody knows how to use a phone because that person died trying to save the life of the only medical examiner who tripped over the body of the only doctor at a crime scene and went tumbling down, leaving the only detective to rot in the department, causing nobody to want to report any crimes because they do not want to walk into the department because of the smell, and nobody knows how to use a phone because that person died trying to save the life of the only medical examiner who tripped over the body of the only doctor at a crime scene and went tumbling down, leaving the only detective to rot in the department, causing nobody to want to report any crimes because they do not want to walk into the department because of the smell, and nobody knows how to use a phone because that person died trying to save the life of the only medical examiner who tripped over the body of the only doctor at a crime scene and went tumbling down, leaving the only detective to rot in the department, causing nobody to want to report any crimes because they do not want to walk into the department because of the smell, and nobody knows how to use a phone because that person died trying to save the life of the only medical examiner who tripped over the body of the only doctor at a crime scene and went tumbling down, leaving the only detective to rot in the department, causing nobody to want to report any crimes because they do not want to walk into the department because of the smell, and nobody knows how to use a phone because that person died trying to save the life of the only medical examiner who tripped over the body of the only doctor at a crime scene and went tumbling down, leaving the only detective to rot in the department, causing nobody to want to report any crimes because they do not want to walk into the department because of the smell, and nobody knows how to use a phone because that person died trying to save the life of the only medical examiner who tripped over the body of the only doctor at a crime scene and went tumbling down, leaving the only detective to rot in the department, causing nobody to want to report any crimes because they do not want to walk into the department because of the smell, and nobody knows how to use a phone because that person died trying to save the life of the only medical examiner who tripped over the body of the only doctor at a crime scene and went tumbling down, leaving the only detective to rot in the department, causing nobody to want to report any crimes because they do not want to walk into the department because of the smell, and nobody knows how to use a phone because that person died trying to save the life of the only medical examiner who tripped over the body of the only doctor at a crime scene and went tumbling down, leaving the only detective to rot in the department, causing nobody to want to report any crimes. Big Jim then went home and his wife shot him to stop him from killing her eventually, but was never arrested because nobody wanted to go into the police department to report the crime, but the only police chief, who was his dad, does not want to see his son because his son made fun of him for smelling like dead body because he was always inside a room with a dead rotting body.

What do you call a man with no body, just a nose? Nobody Knows.

Your moms so dumb she stuffed a battery up her butt and said i got the POWA!

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to its dying chicks who were just run over.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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