If you challenge the tarsier to a staring contest, it wouldnt undersand a word you say, but it would stare at you when you would think that was apropos. the tarsier wouldnt really think anything and would just make a peepee

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What's big, red and eats rocks? A big, red Rock-Eater

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What's worse than throwing 8 babies off a cliff? Throwing 1 baby off a cliff.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Wife: Do you know what the most untruthful lie I've told you? Husband: What? Wife: That I love you. By the way I'm leaving you for your father. The twins are gay and in love with each other and your daughter is a hooker with AIDS. Your mother killed herself upon hearing all this news. She suffered a lot. Oh, the dog died by rat poisoning that your dad put in the backyard. Bye.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

If you stretch all your skin out in a line, you will die of blood loss or possible infection

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why did the chicken cross the road? For a joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

How did the guy drown if he wasn't in water? A shark threw up on him

thumb_up thumb_down -27

That's a lie, buffaloes are extinct now

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Mommy, where do babies come from? In biology, sex is a process of combining and mixing genetic traits, often resulting in the specialization of organisms into a male or female variety (each known as a sex). Sexual reproduction involves combining specialized cells (gametes) to form offspring that inherit traits from both parents. Gametes can be identical in form and function (known as isogametes), but in many cases an asymmetry has evolved such that two sex-specific types of gametes (heterogametes) exist: male gametes are small, motile, and optimized to transport their genetic information over a distance, while female gametes are large, non-motile and contain the nutrients necessary for the early development of the young organism. An organism's sex is defined by the gametes it produces: males produce male gametes (spermatozoa, or sperm) while females produce female gametes (ova, or egg cells); individual organisms which produce both male and female gametes are termed hermaphroditic. Frequently, physical differences are associated with the different sexes of an organism; these sexual dimorphisms can reflect the different reproductive pressures the sexes experience. Thanks mommy

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why did the woman not make her husband a sandwich? Because he died in 9/11

thumb_up thumb_down -27

have you ever noticed that when geese are flying in a V, that one side is longer? Do you know why? no...why? There is more on one side

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Why can't Jesus eat M&M's? Because they keep falling through the holes in his hands.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Q: why did the cookie go to the doctor??? A: because he was sick

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Whats worse that biting into an apple with a worm in it? The Holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Roses are red Violets are Blue Little Timmy died yesterday

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What did the cow call the hen? A hen, what else would you call it?

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What do you call a girl with no arms and an eyepatch? Names.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What did the homeless man give his friends for Christmas? More AIDS.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What do you call a black man with a job? An employee

thumb_up thumb_down -29

why did the pirate not get in to the pirate movie it was rated arrrrrr

thumb_up thumb_down -31

How do you jump off a bridge? You jump

thumb_up thumb_down -31

A patient walks into a clinic and says, "Doctor, Doctor! I feel like a pair of curtains!" The doctor replies, "I have no interest in whether or not you feel like purchasing items to spruce up your home."

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Asians...

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What did the mushroom say to the pretty lady? Nothing, because it's a mushroom.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops