Roses are red Violets r blue My name is Dave Microwave

What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhino? Photoshop

What does your girlfriend eat every morning that is white, warm and sticky? Oatmeal

A Higgs Boson walks into a church. The priest says “We don’t allow Higgs Bosons in here.” The Higgs Boson replied, “Well, without me, you can’t have mass.”

Is this Chick-fil-a? No, this is Joe.

Hitler was a pretty good guy I guess

Why did little Suzy fall off the swing? She didn't have arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Suzy.

What did the mail man say to the resident? I have your mail. Now let's f*ck.

What did the penis say to the vagina? Nothing, genitalia can't speak.

A Muslim blows up a bar

Your mama's so fat her patronus is a cake

Small breasts.

What's the similarity between a grape and an elephant? Both are purple except for the elephant.

Why did the penguin go to the cookie shop? He didn't, penguins don't eat cookies

Roses are red Violets are red Tulips are red Bushes are red Trees are red Fences are red OMG MY FENCE IS ON FIRE!

The grass is always greener on the give me a blowjob.

Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you'll probably just land back on earth.

Why did the chicken cross the road? KFC was closed.

Whats the best thing that happened to the jews The Holocaust

Sam: Knock knock? You: Who's there? Sam: Sammy Sosa. You: Hi, Sammy Sosa. Sam: Hi.

Wanna hear a funny joke? Women's rights.

What do you call a bus full of lawyers at the bottom of the ocean? A tragedy

What do you call a fridge? Dorothy.

Vagina-Boob

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...