Timmy stop making noises while mommy is working. I have to finish these TPS reports or else my boss will be very mad at me and we won't have Christmas again.

here's a great way to ruin someone's 'knock knock' joke: Knock knock Come in!

What is the difference between a Ferrari and a dead hooker? One is a car and one is a human being.

Homosexual babies? It's a choice

What Starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Popcorn.

what is poop in pee? bagel thins? tuesday.

What comes to mind when you say the word "Mind?" Your Mind

Why is Digimon better than Pokemon? It has a better story and character development.

i like my women like i like my coffee...big boobs

A boy watches as a firefighter saves a little girl from a fire and looks at his mom saying "I want to be a firefighter when i grow up mommy" The mom looks down and replies "Silly kid you're not gunna grow up you have leukemia."

Q) What did the Hobo get for Xmas? A) Nothing

What do you get when you cross a grizzly bear and a dolphin? Well, the odds of these two animals mating are slim to none. Due to the undeniable fact that dolphins live in the ocean primarily in the warmer tropical waters and grizzly bears live on land in the pacific northwest where the water would be too cold for the dolphin anyway. The dolphin would be swimming around avoiding sharks and the bear would probably be eating a salmon. But if they did breed you would get a dolphinbear. Although a dolphinbear would have a very low chance of survival given it's part dolphin. Dolphins are pussies.

Knock Knock. Who's there? UPS.

what is fat and ugly. fat and ugly people

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

Yo mommas so stupid, she got raped.

How do you find a needle in a haystack? You don't, you're too distracted by the pile of adorable kittens next to it

Guy 1: there is this really funny knock knock joke. Ok you start. Guy 2: knock knock Guy 1: who's there Guy 2: umm what? I don't know

I'm not as random as you think i salad.

69

What did the monkey say to the garbage collector? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAA

Q. How do you kill a fish A. You don't have to BP already did

cms.......?????

A white man, a black man and a muslim walk into a bar. The bar explodes, but the white man is the only one that dies, thanks to reasonable accommodations.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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