If you're a man, why don't you want to drop the soap in prison? The shower floors are disgusting and carry bacteria. No way would any person -- man or woman -- want to touch it.

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What do a grape and a spider have in common? Both have 8 legs..... Except for the grape.

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Your mom is so fat that she sat on a rock.

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What di the wrecking ball say to the house? Duck!!!

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How can you confuse a blonde? Give her a calculus worksheet that she hasn't learned how to do.

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What do you call a mouse that sings? Justin Bieber

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What is the difference between a grape and an elephant? They are both grapes, except for the elephant.

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Whats worse than getting in a 30 MPH car accident? Getting in a 40 MPH car accident.

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You want to know what is worse than having a teen parent? Being a teen parent.

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Q. what did the refuge from uganda say to his mom when he was riding his bike A. look ma no hands.....

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Knock knock! Who's there? The police, we found your cat's body on the side of the road.

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Two Jewish men walk into a butcher shop. They don't buy any pork because that is a fundamental dietary restriction placed upon by their religion.

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Why did the woman make a sandwich? She was hungry

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Why did the blonde cross the road? Because she was stupid.

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What is worse than 10 dead babies in a trash can? 1 dead baby in 10 trash cans

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A guy is playing cod

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Why don't you have a seat, over there?

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What do you call a black man selling drugs? A pharmacist

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Life is like a box of chocolates, it doesn't last as long for fat people...

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Why is six afraid of seven? Seven is a convicted rapist.

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Abraham Lincoln was the 16th Presient of the United States of America. The president to follow him was Andrew Johnson, president number 17.

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Peas and Corn. Porn., a deer

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How much does a polar bear weigh? It depends on gender and environment, but a fully grown, adult, male polar bear weighs from 800 to 1600 pounds.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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