Q- Why was Dan mourning the death of his wife? A- He wasn't he was mourning the death of his daughter who was killed in the same car crash as her mother.

What is the best way to put out a fire? Stop, drop and have an orgy.

Yo mama is so fat that you are constantly ridiculed by the local kids and constantly hope that the obesity isn't hereditary.

Why couldn't the Asian reach the sink? Because he was a 4 year old boy, and was only about 3 feet tall.

What is the same about a girrafe, and an ant? They are both REALLY tall. Except for the ant, sorry I lied.

Roses are black Violets are black I'm blind

Why did the chicken cross the road? To warn people on the other side that the sky was falling

Why did the chicken cross the road? Suicide.

What do you call a black man driving a car? A driver.

What did the man tell his parents after having sex with another man? A. I am gay.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are rather unintelligent animals which evidently do not understand the dangers of crossing a busy road.

If you're a man, why don't you want to drop the soap in prison? The shower floors are disgusting and carry bacteria. No way would any person -- man or woman -- want to touch it.

Like this joke

Hi! This is Richard Young, I'll take it from here Ms.Mcgruder, lets find a quiet place to talk about this, e.c. at 5:00 p.m. tomarrow.

How did Hitler die? He saw his gas bill

Q: Why did the horse put on cologne? A: He wanted to smell nice.

How can you tell you're in a childrens' ambulance from the inside? From the clown patterned body bags.

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What do you call a black person trying to swim? Wet.

Four Chavs drove of a cliff today, why was a i sad? It was my car :C

- How do you keep an idiot in suspense? - How? -......

what do you do when you see a 40 ft tall gorilla? WHO CARES, RUN!

Steven Hawking walks into a bar. This of course is impossible, as his ailments prevent him from walking.

What did Jesus say to the Easter Rabbit? Nothing, it ran off before he could say anything. They're so skiddish, those pesky rabbits...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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