Last Christmas I gave you my heart but the very next day your body rejected the transfer and you died.

what's the difference between a pile of shit and a human. a human has a mind, a pile of shit doesn't

How do you get a clown out of a tree? Shoot him in the head.

What do you call something with no legs or arms swimming in the lake? A fish.

What did a man say to the woman with two black eyes? nothing he ain't already told her twice....

Hi

Haiku's can be fun But they don't always make sense Refrigerator

derp

How did Jesus walk on water? He was Jesus

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms

if rooster puts egg on roof, in what direction it will roll? There was no egg

roses are grey violets are grey everything is? grey i'm colour blind fml

High school gym class.

What was the pirate movie rated? PG-13 for violence and brief nudity.

what do you call a muslim driving a plane? a pilot

What's a bug's favorite sport? Bug's can't play sports.

Q: What is the difference between a duck? A: One leg is both the same.

is it big enough to have sex in????

old mcdonald had a farm had..... he now lives in the city

What's the only type of wood that doesn't float? Natalie wood.

Have you ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

What's fat, round and bounces on the ground? Me :'(

How do you stop a run-away bus? You sit down in the driver's seat and gently place your foot on the brake pedular and proceed to press it down. The brake pads, located in the calipers, will squeeze the brake discs and slow the bus eventually to stop at the crosswalk for the old lady accompanied by a young boy scout to cross the street and continue their wonderful lives.

Why was the alpaca sad He just got raped

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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