Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms

thumb_up thumb_down +31

roses are grey violets are grey everything is? grey i'm colour blind fml

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How did Jesus walk on water? He was Jesus

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What did the homeless child get for Christmas? Jumped.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

You know how geese fly in a V formation and sometimes one side is longer than the other. Do you know why that is? Because there are more geese on that side.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

High school gym class.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why Did The Girl Fall Off The Swing. IDK maybe she fell asleep.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

no one walks in to a bar bar tender: shit!

thumb_up thumb_down -72

What would happen if you threw 50 plates off of your roof? Nothing. No one in their right mind would do that. Besides, who owns 50 plates?

thumb_up thumb_down +5

is it big enough to have sex in????

thumb_up thumb_down -9

what's the difference between a pile of shit and a human. a human has a mind, a pile of shit doesn't

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Hi

thumb_up thumb_down -144

Yo mama's so fat, we are all extremely concerned for her health.

thumb_up thumb_down +143

old mcdonald had a farm had..... he now lives in the city

thumb_up thumb_down +7

How do you get a clown out of a tree? Shoot him in the head.

thumb_up thumb_down -43

if rooster puts egg on roof, in what direction it will roll? There was no egg

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Billy had a dream. He saw himself becoming rich and famous. He drove an expensive car and lived in a mansion. His career reached its peak and he was accused by the media of having numerous sexual relations and drug problems. After 3 years of rehab he made an excellent comeback tour in which his name made it back onto the front pages and his respect regained. In his later years, he died of an accidental drug overdose and his loyal fans pay tribute to him every year. But this will never happen to Billy. Billy is a cactus.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

what goes plop, plop, fizz, fizz? baby twins in an acid bath.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

Have you ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

You cannot invite, hire people for money and expect loyalty Red, you need to make them earn the right to work for you, merits, background checks, consistency, friend, I can help you with a lot of my own experience, what saddens me about you being the leader, is that you have a good heart. And you are naive, a dangerous combination, if anyone such as Jonas shows up again, your life may be in danger, I mean you know who I am talking about.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

what did the Mexican fire fighter name his two kids? Jose and Josbe

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What's a bug's favorite sport? Bug's can't play sports.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Q: What is the difference between a duck? A: One leg is both the same.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did the tree say when it was cut down? Nothing, it's a tree

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops