Q: What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? A: Nothing, they never met! :)

Roses are red violets are blue. I have amnesia so say hello to your nan when you get home

What is the saddest part of a Jew's life? The fact that every single day the world turns more and more 'jokingly' anti-semetic until the point that the Jewish people have become so overwhelmed by depression that they begin committing suicide until the point of Jewish extinction.

The horse's name was Friday

A white man and a black man were walking down the street. The black borrowed the white man's phone to make a quick call when an incoming call came in. The black man, while trying to hand the phone back, says, "Here, it's your Dad." The white man replies, "No, that's my phone." Amazed at how uneducated the black man was.

What's the only type of wood that doesn't float? Natalie wood.

How do you keep an italian from talking? You duct tape his mouth.

Your mama's so fat she's going on weight-watchers to pursue a healthier lifestyle and avoid the longterm effects of obesity.

How do you get a clown out of a tree? Shoot him in the head.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

An Asian person drove home safely.

Why did Ralph fall off the swing He was distracted because he had a perfect view of the twin towers when 9-11 was happening

What has three legs and bleeds? A cat with a cut off leg.

Q. Why did the mother dissagree with her son's choice in friends? A. Because they were a rather bad influence on him and his grades had gotten considerably worse since they started to hang out.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didnt a black guy ate him.

why didnt the boys drink the coffee? because she coughed on it

Knock knock. Who's there? To get the other side!

Dad: "When I was your age, I had to walk outside to catch the school bus. If it snowed heavily the night before, school was canceled."

A zookeeper, a shoemaker, and a guy named Billy Jones walks into a bar. The bartender says "sorry, we closed". So they left.

What's fat, round and bounces on the ground? Me :'(

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

What did the tree say when it was cut down? Nothing, it's a tree

What's the difference between 2 flies? Their DNA

Q1: How do you get an elephant to laugh? A1: Tell it a joke. Q2: How do you get a cow to laugh? A2: Cows can't laugh.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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