A jew walks into an Oven....

What's black, white and red all over and can't turn around in a corridor? A nun with a spear through her

Q: What is the difference between a duck? A: One leg is both the same.

What's the difference between 2 flies? Their DNA

Q1: How do you get an elephant to laugh? A1: Tell it a joke. Q2: How do you get a cow to laugh? A2: Cows can't laugh.

How many men does it take to change a light bulb? One.

What was the pirate movie rated? PG-13 for violence and brief nudity.

What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa Claus? Tiger Woods is a real guy. Sorry kids.

Dad: "When I was your age, I had to walk outside to catch the school bus. If it snowed heavily the night before, school was canceled."

roses are grey violets are grey everything is? grey i'm colour blind fml

A zookeeper, a shoemaker, and a guy named Billy Jones walks into a bar. The bartender says "sorry, we closed". So they left.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

Why did the boy fall out of his tree house? the tree house was hit by lightning

What did the homeless child get for Christmas? Jumped.

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What did the cancer patient get for Christmas? Nothing, cause he didn't make it till Christmas...

What did the tree say when it was cut down? Nothing, it's a tree

What was the blind man doing at the movies? He was on a date.

Why was Jimmy afraid of coming out of the closet? He had agoraphobia.

Billy had a dream. He saw himself becoming rich and famous. He drove an expensive car and lived in a mansion. His career reached its peak and he was accused by the media of having numerous sexual relations and drug problems. After 3 years of rehab he made an excellent comeback tour in which his name made it back onto the front pages and his respect regained. In his later years, he died of an accidental drug overdose and his loyal fans pay tribute to him every year. But this will never happen to Billy. Billy is a cactus.

what's the difference between a pile of shit and a human. a human has a mind, a pile of shit doesn't

yo mamas like a spider always getting wrapped up in her own cu*

Why did Cam newton win the heisman? Wait Cam Newton won the heisman?

whats better than sex? cookies

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...