whats the difference between a mexican and an elevator? An elevator can raise a child.

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Whats the hardest part of eating a vegetable? The wheelchair

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a couple argue and spend the night 96ing each other

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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Whats the difference between Osama and Obama? The S is replaced with a B.

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Knock knock. Who's? There Where? Right here.

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Why was the woman crying I kick her in the ass really really really hard... With steal toe boots... That had a spike on them... That was biped in poison... And man did she scream.

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So there are 2 ninjas in a dojo, The first ninja turns to the second ninja, and says something in Japanese

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Why can't Tom go horse back riding? He is paralized from the neck down

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A man walks into a bar and orders some grapes. The bartender says he does not have any grapes available. The man leaves.

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Your mama's so fat she's going on weight-watchers to pursue a healthier lifestyle and avoid the longterm effects of obesity.

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what's funnier than Norm Mcdonald? EVERY THING

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Horse tits

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2 scrubbers walk into a room , one says " can you you smell fresh-air spray"?

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A boy walks into a baker, asks for a loaf of bread. The baker enquires "White or brown?" to which the boy replies "It doesn't matter, I've got my bike."

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Fine then, its me Tifa, I am sorry for going against your ideology, I was trying to emulate and copy you, but yeah... Bad thing is that yeah I taught these concepts to a real shitload of people Nero, on the bright side, its not much compared to what you know. Sorry for being all rude, but thirty something? I mean I never seen your face nor even the color of your skin Mr Doctor Doom, but you always struck me as very, very old. I kinda appreciate you calling me the girl with the big red scared eyes, most people call me you know, most people never look me in the eyes, not that I really blame them.

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Haiku's can be fun But they don't always make sense Refrigerator

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What happens when you read every anti-joke on anti-joke? You spend a lot of time in front of a screen. This means you should have a 10-15 minute break, so that your sinuses can rest and you don't develop a headache.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didnt a black guy ate him.

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Why does kelly keep going on about breasts ? cus shes into chicks !!!

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why didnt the boys drink the coffee? because she coughed on it

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Roses are red violets are blue. I have amnesia so say hello to your nan when you get home

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Q1: How do you get an elephant to laugh? A1: Tell it a joke. Q2: How do you get a cow to laugh? A2: Cows can't laugh.

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Why did the woman scream when she saw her brother? Cause he was dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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