whats the difference between a mexican and an elevator? An elevator can raise a child.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Whats the difference between a fire hydrant and the color green? They're both green. Except the fire hydrant.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What's the difference between a kleenex and a man? One absorbs your tears while the other makes you cry.

thumb_up thumb_down +211

What's the difference between a dead baby and a Ferrari? I don't keep a Ferrari in my garage. (????)?

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Yeah, you cant make nukes without certain components which are illegal to come by, you know Iranian Uranium I believe, I still feel pretty ill, if you dont mind, lets change the subject. Say, does the word yellowcake mean anything to you?

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's worse than sitting in a car that's steered by a woman? Sitting in an airplane steered by a suicidal pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

what's funnier than Norm Mcdonald? EVERY THING

thumb_up thumb_down -35

What is black, white and hungry? A woman with a rare skin disorder known as Vitiligo which causes discolourtion of the skins pigment in patches; who is hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

You wanna know what sucks about your face? . . Everything.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was a self-absorbed prick. And, honestly, the chicken and the road weren't that great of friends anyway.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did the bugger cross the rode? He was tired of getting picked on

thumb_up thumb_down -50

A knock knock B who's there A your newborn give me your money or I will hang all your kids

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why was sally crying? she was sad

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Knock knock. Who's? There Where? Right here.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why are anti jokes funny....cause morons come up with them...

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why cant Helen Keller drive a bus? Cuz she's dead!

thumb_up thumb_down +7

what do you a call quadriplegic man in a pile of leaves? Rustle

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Fine then, its me Tifa, I am sorry for going against your ideology, I was trying to emulate and copy you, but yeah... Bad thing is that yeah I taught these concepts to a real shitload of people Nero, on the bright side, its not much compared to what you know. Sorry for being all rude, but thirty something? I mean I never seen your face nor even the color of your skin Mr Doctor Doom, but you always struck me as very, very old. I kinda appreciate you calling me the girl with the big red scared eyes, most people call me you know, most people never look me in the eyes, not that I really blame them.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

A man walks into a bar and orders some grapes. The bartender says he does not have any grapes available. The man leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

2 scrubbers walk into a room , one says " can you you smell fresh-air spray"?

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why did the little boy run away from Michael Jackson? Because he was scared

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Horse tits

thumb_up thumb_down -150

Why Did The Girl Fall Off The Swing. IDK maybe she fell asleep.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

A gorilla walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a glass of celery. The bartender stands speechless due to the ridiculousness of the given situation.

thumb_up thumb_down +168

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops