Whats the difference between the floor and the ceiling? One of them is higher!

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Ching Chong Chinaman sitting on a wall. Along came the white man and greeted him hello.

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Theres 3 guys walking and the see a genie. He says hell grant 3 wishes. The first guy asked for sandals. The genie said"I can do that" and he got sandals. The second guy asked for rock hard abs.The genie said,"sure thing".When he looked down, he saw that he had rock hard abs. The third guy asked for a pair of pants."ok" Said the genie. And then he got a pair of pants.

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A horse walks into a bar. Bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by it surroundings, and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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Dinosaur!

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why did the guy with cancer die? because he had cancer

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What's the difference between a bowl of cereal and a bowl of pudding? A bowl of cereal has milk in it.

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Whats the difference between a fire hydrant and the color green? They're both green. Except the fire hydrant.

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A guy walks into a store and buys a sandwich.

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How many black people does it take to change a light bulb? one.

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What does the Christian celebrate on Christmas? Christmas

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A man dropped his pen so he picked it up. He is satisfied that he is a sufficient worker.

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Q: why is the squirrel stuck in the tree? A: because he should have finished high school.

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A man in a restaurant says "Waiter! What's this fly doing in my soup?" The waiter apologizes and offers to comp the meal.

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Why didnt the deer move out of the street when the guy yelled at it? Because deer are a very sensitive species you should try asking politely next time.

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http://www.youtube.com/user/SWkangaroo

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Frogs with dislocated fingers....................................................CARROT

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Why cant Helen Keller drive a bus? Cuz she's dead!

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Yeah, you cant make nukes without certain components which are illegal to come by, you know Iranian Uranium I believe, I still feel pretty ill, if you dont mind, lets change the subject. Say, does the word yellowcake mean anything to you?

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I know you are but what am I? A queer.

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Why did ned fall out of the tree? Because he was hit by a koala.

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Q., Why did you mum eat mum on ur mom go die mom niga nigga cut me hang me lolololo A.my cat died shut up newb lololololo

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I used to be a Businessman like you, then I took a plane to the North Tower.

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Why did the man fall off the cliff? I don't know, I have mental AIDS.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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