Guess what? You just lost the game.

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A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

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Q: what do you call a black guy on the moon A: An astronaut you resist bastard

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being raped by a Triceratops. What's worse than being raped by a Triceratops? Being gang raped by a herd of Triceratops.

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Why are these jokes so funny? I don't know?

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Q: What has two wheels and is not funny? A:Ryan Vallee on a segway -Ryan V

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A guy walks into a store and buys a sandwich.

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Why did ned fall out of the tree? Because he was hit by a koala.

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? You would too if your name was mmfmffemuuuuuffuummuuuuuluuu.

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What does the Christian celebrate on Christmas? Christmas

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why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? because i shot it.

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Knock Knock Dude i am not going to answer the door

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What's more fun than nailing babies to a wall? Ripping them off again.

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What do you call a Muslim flying a plane A pilot.

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If an iPad 2 is better than an iPad 1, than what's better than an iPad 2? An iPad 3

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How many militant feminist does it take to change a lightbulb? 2, one to change the bulb and another to suck my dick.

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Three men walk into a bar because they were all blind.

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"Knock knock." "Who's there?" Not the best move Anne Frank ever made.

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The jinx machine just stole your money... ... this poem was supposed to be funny

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Wanna hear an inside joke? Cancer.

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A dog goes into a bar. He is wearing an eye patch. The dog says to the bartender, "Have you heard the one about the one-eyed dog?" The bartender, who is deaf in one ear, thinks the dog is making fun of him. He asks him to leave. The dog says, "Don't you have a sense of humor, deafie?" At the end of his shift, the bartender is tired of all the jokes. Today it's a one-eyed dog. Yesterday it was a horse with rickets. The day before: ants. He lives above the bar, in a small room. He spends the night alone there, listing to his battery operated radio, which picks up only a bad jazz station. He listens to bad jazz with his bad ear.

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So I was making this bagel right?And my dad walks in while I'm making this bagel(cause we're in a rush you know?) and he's yells"HURRY UP!!!!"I'm like man.... I sure do got alot of YELL in my bagel .

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Ask me if I am an orange. "Are you an orange?" No.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops