Q.)What did the man say to the toilet A.) Hi Jon

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A priest, a rabbi and a shaman walk into a bar. Except there is no rabbi and there is no shaman and the bar is actually my 8th birthday party priest is molesting me. And the priest is my dad. My dad molested me. A lot...

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Q: where did the pickle live? A: In the desert

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Excuses are like butt holes...they are round

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Yo' mama's so fat, she has difficulty finding clothes that fit

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When is a door not a door? When it was never actually a door in the first place and you just thought, for whatever reason, that i was.

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Chuck Norris walks into a bar, the bartender, a known drug smuggler for the Mexican Cartel fires three shotgun rounds. As the bartender reloads Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks first the shotgun out of the man's hands followed by three very quick blows to the head. The bartender goes down unconscious and he is arrested. Though the program is no longer produced, Walker Texas Ranger was a somewhat enjoyable, although poorly written and low budgeted made for television action crime drama series produced from April 21, 1993 to May 19, 2001.

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Why did Sally Fall Off The Swing? She had no arms Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Sally

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? 9/11

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Love is in the air? Wrong. Nitrogen, Oxygen and Carbon Dioxide are in the air.

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Q. Why cant Stephen Hawking walk into a bar? A. Because he suffered being paralyzed and is unable to walk. So theoretically speaking it is impossible to walk when paralyzed and in a wheelchair unless the victim is out of his or her wheelchair. Please note that the chances of walking when paralyzed are extremely slim.

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Q. Why did billy die? A. Becuase everyone dies in life

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Why did the black guy get arrested? Homicide.

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One kid clicks his pen. The kid sitting next to home clicks his pen. They next 3 kids click their pens. The teacher walks by and says "monkey see monkey do." And the kid that first clicked his pen responded and says "monkey pees all over you."

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Rob Bell

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How do you make a baby cry? You hit it in the face with a hammer.

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the awkward moment when Rick Astley gives you up

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Q .What robin told to batman before they got into the car? A. Get into the car!!

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Two muffings are in an oven. One leans towards the other due to rising of the batter and says nothing. The other cupcake, unable to yield the cognitive process to speak utters nothing and cooks to an internal temperature of 175 C.

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Two black people passed me in an alley at night...... They said hi

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When my Xbox died, my girlfriend said: "Finally, you can treat me the same way you treated that thing!" So I tapped her so hard that she died

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Your mom is so fat that it's becoming a serious health concern...

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You're so straight!

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You know how we have iPods? OJ Simpson strangled his wife.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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