A person walks into a store. He goes to a worker an asks "were is the potatos?" . The worker says, there on that shelf.

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your mamas so fat she falls out f both sides of the bed

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whats slower then a turtle A FATTY

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What do you call a cow with big horns? A bull.

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Chocolate tastes good.

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Once upon a time there was a little puppy. He then grew old and died.

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A Jew, a Muslim, and a Christian walk into a bar, they then sit down and discuss the various political factors driving a wedge between unity, peace, harmony and understaning between their religions. They resolve that despite the differences in religious belief, essentially they are all the same, and want happy existences with family and friends, and that equality and peace between religions should be a prime focus of religious institutions and governments. They then band together to criticize aetheists, who present a much more probable explanation for why the Universe is the way it is. An eavesdropper then mulls over the idea that the various religions represented behind him are willing to debate philosophical standpoints, so long as their monotheistic beliefs are not contradicted.

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What did the little boy find when he came home from school? His mother hanging from a tree.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Joseph Kony. Give me your children.

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A purple kangaroo hops into a bar. There is no such thing as a purple kangaroo. The end.

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What did Bobby get for Christmas? Nothing, Bobby is an orphan and has no friends.

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Why do girls wear makeup and perfume? Because they are ugly and smell

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What's the best part about Africa? Nothing.

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What do you call a monkey? A monkey.

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What do you call a banana that's about to be eaten? A Banana

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What do you call a black person in 1780? A slave mostly...

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A man and a woman are in bed together and really want to do something, what is that something? Sleep.

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Why did sally fall of the swing? She didn't have any arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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why are these jokes so funny? why are u so fat bitch

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nbjhfghl

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Q: how many Pollocks does it take to paint a house? A: 100. 99 to spin the house and 1 to hold the paint brush

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how did the dinosaurs die? they got old

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Jim and Larry work together. Jim works hard, and Larry is a bit of a prankster. One day, Jim is having a rather rough day, and Larry looks to cheer him up with a good-natured joke. Knowing that Jim's wife prepares dinner for him every night of the week, he calls her and tells her that their boss has decided to pay for a dinner out, that she should take the day off and just get ready for Jim to come home and pick her up. Larry will later follow up by calling a pizza delivery place and having them send a special no hard feeling message with two large delicious pizzas. He forgets to call the pizza delivery man until later that night, after which it's too late and he thinks "I'll just explain the joke to Jim tomorrow." And goes peacefully to sleep. Arriving home and finding that dinner is not prepared, Jim savagely beats his wife.

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How many Jews can you fit in a Jeep? Four.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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