what did the dog say to the cat? nothing cause animals dont talk.

Who didn't let the gorilla into the ballet? The people who were in charge of that decision.

Knock knock Come in

Did you see Helen Keller's doll house? No... Well it's really nice!

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got a smoke dectecter, You died in a fire

What's red and green and goes 500 mph? A frog in a blender.

Q: What do you call a innocent black man that was shot 403 times by the cops when they asked for his ID and somehow assumed he was gonna reach for a gun? A: Deceased Texan.

Why does the Easter Bunny hide his eggs? So nobody finds he's been fucking hens.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue Your Adopted Deal With It!!!

What do Justin Bieber and corn have in common? They are both fruits. Except for the corn.

Why was the Saudi Arabian terrorist flying a plane in America? He was going to visit some family on a ranch in Kansas.

One day a terribly epileptic child is put on on a strict Atkins diet by his loving mother. A week later he finds that the frequency and intensity of his seizures have been reduced by its ketogenic effects, which provides exogenous fats for the body to burn, but limits the available carbohydrate so that ketone bodies build up. It is the high level of these ketones which appear to suppress seizures.

two men where hunting one man shot a deer and ate it, the other man shot the man who killed the deer and made human steaks. a day later he killed his family. and ate them with his dog. he then grabbed the deer that was left in his fridge and used it to make a fire.

3 men of different races walk into a bar. The bartender then proceeds to ask, "what would you 3 men like?"

How many dead babies can you fit inside Casey Anthony's trunk? Trick question. She didn't do it.

Q How is it Going Patty? A:Hi Patrick hows it going?

Q. Whats black and red all over? A. A black wall thats been painted red.

Why was the woman angry with Santa Claus? Because he kicked her hands.

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

Haikus are lovely But sometimes do not make sense Refrigerator

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has Stevie Wonder.

why was six afraid of seven? because seven threatened to kill him and his family.

*Walk Into The Bakery* "Excuse me, sir. How much does the challah cost (holocaust)?

What did the Germans cook in their giant oven made for cooking jews? Jews.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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