Whats The diference between a park bench and a black man? A park bench can support a family of five hahahhaahahah

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I walk into Tesco and wrestle an obese women for a packet of ''Mini's Biscuits''. This quarrel was over nothing but a trolley filled with them. I gradually became infuriated. Meanwhile, an employee commited suicide.

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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Q- if a small quiz is a quizicle then whats a small test A- a testicle

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What happened to the lady? She queefed.

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Why was the woman angry with Santa Claus? Because he kicked her hands.

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How to shrink China's population in a few minutes? Nuke them all, simple.

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Billy wanted a toy for Christmas. Sadly, Billy died before Christmas.

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Yo mama so fat when she dresses in red she looks like clifford the big red dog!

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Who cut the cheese? It's sliced so evenly.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being ripped apart by an angry orangatang because orangatangs have the strength of ten men.

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Michael walked into a bar, The rest of the bar initially erupted with laughter until the his carer made everybody aware that Michael suffered from brittle bones and that he had actually fractured his hip after colliding with the bar. People then understood the gravity situation as the bartender immediately dialled the emergency services. Michael managed to recover physically from the accident but to this day he is still scarred from the laughter aimed at him the night of his accident and is too afraid to return to the bar again in fear of being mocked despite the misunderstanding of the situation.

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A black man was walking down the street wearing a ski mask. It was cold outside.

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Q How is it Going Patty? A:Hi Patrick hows it going?

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I wonder what mute people say to themselves. :/

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A devout Islamic man walks into a weapons of mass destruction store he is shocked and appalled at how easily such dangerous weapons can be bought.

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What did the librarian say to the rude man who was talking very loudly? The librarian said "shhh keep it down."

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Your Adopted Deal With It!!!

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Your mom is so fat that she saw a school bus full of white children and , thought "I can hardly even remember a time when my body used to be slim." She now keeps track of her diet and exercises regularly,the result of this has been a weight loss of over 95 pounds.

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What's the difference between a black person and a pizza? Pizza is a type of food.

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what do u call a hairy cow? Harry

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What's hot and cold at the same time? Hotcold.

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How do you keep black people from your Kool-aid? How? You put it in a safe-deposit box.

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How many babies does it take to paint a fence? depends on how hard you throw them.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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