Identical jokes get different amounts of votes

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Why do Squirrels accidentally plant millions of trees. Because they bury their nuts and forget where they are.

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what do you call a cat that cant meow? Charlie Sheen.

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Jim: Kevin, how old are you? Kevin cries because they are twins. His Brother was hit in the head with a bat yesterday and does not remember anything.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs? Unfortunate

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A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

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What did the first Ethiopian say to the other? He asked for some food only to realize that the other one had already starved to death.

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What's eighteen inches long, stiff, and makes women scream at night? A twelve inch long penis that is erect, thus adding approximately one half of its flaccid size, and involved in the act of fornication with the female partner of the man whose penis I am describing. (Of course, it is ignorant and juvenile to assume that the man in question is heterosexual. He may be a homosexual, which is perfectly acceptable in these liberal times we live in, or he may in fact be single and not inclined towards a sexual preference of any kind. This is understandable due to the myriad complications of long-term relationships, a result of the infinite differences between the masculine and feminine psyches.)

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What did one bulbasaur say to one squirtle? Well, first off, pokemon are virtual animals created solely for the enjoyment of entertaining japanese children and causing seizure episodes. This fictional creation then migrated to an american tv market, still maintaining their superficial existence while continuing to promote slavery and the use of round balls that capture your problems and propagate winning through random ball throwing. They are fake, and as they are fake, the bulbasaur said "we are fake"

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what did the oven say to the firdge you hot baby

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A young Asian boy got a B on his test. He went home an showed his parents even though he was nervous of their reaction. They told him that a B was a good grade and put it on the fridge. After that he began to gradually flunk each class one by one because of his parent's inability to push him to be better. He is now homeless and an alcoholic.

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Q: Whats a spanish teacher who cant speak spanish A: duhh. it called an english teacher

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Why did the mailman deliver the wrong mail to people's houses? He's a bad mailman.

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What's so similar about a zombie and a black man? They are both almost human.

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What did Timmy's mom think of his art project? Nothing, she screamed and called an ambulance because she saw that he had tripped and fallin onto a pair of scissors and they just so happened to peirce his heart.

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Q-Why did the little boy feel hot? A-Because he faceplanted into a bonfire.

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Why can't Helen Keller just kidding she's dead

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What' worse than random Holocaust jokes? The Holocaust

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Robin, get in the car, please.

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Why did the jew put a parking meter on his roof.? ....So santa would have to pay to park.

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers.

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Where do you go when you find a fork in the road? To the nearest restaurant.

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Q: Why did the Asian fail his driving test? A: Lack of concentration on the road and low knowledge of functioning a car.

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Why did the computer explode into a million peices? It was thrown off the Empire State building.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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