How many kids does it take to get a day off of school? ...26

What did the black man say when he jumped in the pool? The water's nice, you should join me.

What did the slutty blonde get her boyfriend for Valentine's Day? Nothing because she had died of AIDS months ago.

What did the indian boy say to his friend? He didn't he was too busy studying

What did the pirate say to the ninja? I have aids.

A middle aged woman walks into a bar. Its Friday and there is a breeze in the air. She leaves shortly thereafter.

what is worse than 10 dead babies in a trash can? 11 dead babies in a trash can

1,2,3,4,5..what comes next? yeah you should know how to count

How do you make a blond cry? You punch her in the face.

What did the businessman do to get a promotion? He traded oral sex for his male bosses kind heart...

why did stuart buy an ipad from the mall. because he wanted an ipad

what did the guy say when he lost his sandwich? wheres my sandwich?

- Mom, you have a banana in you ear. - What? Son I can't hear you, I have banana in my ear.

Why did dallin fall off the swing he got hit by jds big penis

A man walks into a bar. Three hours later, ambulances arrived, because the man was knocked out. The man who saved was known as a hero, and was awarded a medal for his good deed.

Why was the emo kid sad? Because he gets raped by his dad every night

How do my feet smell? Oh wait. They can't. Feet are not sentient independent beings and therefore cannot experience the five senses, including smell.

What is green and smells like paint? Grass, it doesnt smell like paint, I lied.

Whats better than 32 dead babies stapled to 1 tree? - 1 dead baby stapled to 32 trees

Johnny fell out of the window. Except he didn't fall I pushed him

Your mamma so fat she bungie jumped straight to hell

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put C where A is. :D

why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a tomato.

HAHAH MY WORD IS HAPPY CLAPPY

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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