what did the little girl with no legs and no arms get for christmas? Cancer

What's worse than watching paint dry or grass grow? Watching paint dry on grass.

Why don’t stores sell mouse-flavored cat food? It’s a matter of marketing; tuna, chicken and liver flavors sound much more palatable to the humans buying the pet food.

charly ate an apple. the apple was filled with poison and charly died.

What's worse than having a gay friend? 9/11.

What did the boy with no legs get for his birthday? Pants.

Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? No? Well he graduated in four years with a degree in chemical engineering. He worked hard all four years in order to keep his scholarship to the university. Now he leads a very successful life and lives in a large house with his wife and two children.

Wanna hear a joke about my penis? Oh wait I shouldn't tell you, it's too long

a man walks into a bar, when he leaves he thinks he can hold his liquor and kills a mother and two children attempting to drive home.

What do you call a girl who has slept with five guys? Her name.

It's likely that very few people will read this.

pants on the ground pants on the ground lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground

what would u di if u were having anal sex with a black guy and his dick was soooo bi that ir rippped ur asshole? staple it back together

Yo mama so fat you have to grease the door frame and hold a twinkie on the other side just to get her through.

Q: A man walked into a bar and said, "Ouch!" Why? A: The man walked into a METAL bar.

Q: Why did the white mother with a newborn baby lock her car doors? A: Because a black guy walked by.

How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Oh my gosh a talking muffin.

a dog jumping up and catching a frisbi

Doctor I have a headace! The doctor was dead.

Why does Greg steal? Because he is a thief He is also scouse!

I hate it when people dont finish there sen

what do you get when you cross an ant with toni? ANTONI

Whats worse than being out in the cold? Having cancer.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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