Q: What would you think if a homeless person asked, "Spare change for drugs and cigarettes?" A: At least he was being honest.

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What do you call a black man playing a bass guitar? A bassist.

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a brunet,a redhead,and a blone were stranded on an island 4 miles away from land. the brunet swam 1 mile and drowned. the redhead swam 2 and drowned. the blond swam 3 miles and decided to swim 3 miles back to the island

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What did the sad man say to the happy man? He didn't say anything he was so sad he killed himself.

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when geese fly in a v formation, why is one side always longer then the other? Because you touch yourself at night...

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EVERYBODY has a penis!!! Everybody!!!!

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What did the child get from there parent on Christmas? Nothing. He's an orphan.

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Your mom is such a big whore that she sleeps with your dad.

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Q. Why do cheetahs run so fast? A. Because their bodies allow them to.

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How do you get your dog to give you a blow job? You have to force him.

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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Whats the difference between a black man and a paraplegic? A paraplegic doesn't walk out on his family

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A praying mantis is very graceful

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a dyslecstic son seys to his mum can i have a mcdonald for tea the mum seys ye if you can spell mcdonlds and the son seys fuk that im having a kcf

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Actually it was me Josh brown

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How does a black guy die? Unknown

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what is big, grey and sits in the middle of a field. A filing cabinet

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Why did Johnny fall off his bike? His father never taught him how to ride one as he was an abusive alcoholic who abandoned Johnny's mother when Johnny was 3, so he is not very good at riding bikes.

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how do you open a can of coke with no tab? throw a washing machine at it

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What do you do with a wombat? Allow it to freely express instinctive behaviour in its natural habitat.

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They found Michael Jackson dead in his house and found Madeleine McAnn in the cupboard 8P

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Fred: says hi Bob: says shut up why the hell do you have to be so rude!!! Fred:thankyou ob thats better

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

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Grandpa loved a good joke, he died laughing. The doctor said it was a severe stroke probably brought on by smoking aggravated by high cholesterol and high blood pressure.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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