Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has Stevie Wonder.

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What can fit between breasts? Is long? And gets hard when you jerk it? A seatbelt.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Pizzas were meant to be put in an oven.

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So there was a guy in the middle of the street, how did he survive? ...He doesnt because he gets hit by a car becuase hes in the middle of the street...

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A horse walks into a bar You have been reading so many anti jokes that you can actually anticipate the anti-joke punchline to this joke, because it is one of maybe 3 or 4.

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Have you seen Stevie Wanders new house? No. Neither has he.

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Im taking a shit right now.

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Doctor! Doctor! There's a fly in my soup! Gross.

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A black and a white man walk into a grocery store the black man buys fried chicken and the white man buys vegtables. The men both have different opions and enjoy different food groups.

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Q How is it Going Patty? A:Hi Patrick hows it going?

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What did you say? I'm blind. (Did not write this meaning to be offensive)

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Q:why did jimmy fall of a swing? A:Because someone threw a fridge at him

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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Why did the washing machine laugh? Because it took the piss out of the knickers!!!!! :)

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Reality is often boring. TV is often bad for you. Reality TV is boring AND bad for you.

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a black guy walks into a store and is caught stealing things the police are called they get there and hes calmly escorted to the police car

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A devout Islamic man walks into a weapons of mass destruction store he is shocked and appalled at how easily such dangerous weapons can be bought.

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I like my coffee like I like my slaves... Free

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What more orange that a lime? Most things.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Blanket Blanket who? Blanket, son of deceased recording artist Michael Jackson. Ever since his father died there has been so much stress in the family that he could not handle it. He ran away and is now seeking shelter and grief council.

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If life throws you lemons, get under some shelter so you don't get pelted by flying fruit and worry about making lemonade later.

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Your momma smells so bad that she purchased arm and hammer products to improve upon her natural scent.

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What's the difference between an orange and a banana? they're spelled differently

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Why doesn't Austin have sex? Because when his wife gets hot he puts dirt on her and hits her with a shovel

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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