- Anti Joke

Why did the pumpkin stop using the jack hammer? Pumpkins cannot use power tools since they are nothing but an orange gourd. But, [for sport] say this ‘pumpkin’ was incarnate; one could assume he was done with his demolition work. He then would return the portable drill to the rental facility and get his deposit back.

Knock Knock. Erm, sorry to be weird, but can you perhaps use the doorbell, because it's new and has a novelty chime. I'm proud of it and get a little chuckle everytime it rings in the vain hope that, perhaps you, the visitor, may also find it entertaining. Who's there anyway?'

Dylan: "I dont understand anti-jokes"

What tastes worse than dog shit? White dog shit.

What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my Tractor?"

What did the black man do to the white woman? I Dont KNow ask him

why did the teacher quit her job and become a musician? Because her class was very mean to her and growing up she had always wanted to play music

My Friend Philip had his lip removed today. he is just Phil now.

Why can a black man beat a white man in basketball? They are generally better at basketball Why cant a black man beat a KKK member in basketball? He valued his life and didnt want to die

What's worse than finding out your friend is gay? Being gang-raped.

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

Do you like fish sticks? Yes. Me too.

What did one tree say to the other tree? Nothing, trees can't talk.

An English man, a German man and a Canadian man stood on the edge of a cliff. The English and German both jump off. What happens then? The Canadian says "they were serious?!" and runs away to fake his death and live the rest of his life as Frank Brown.

Why is Joel always with Jamie? Because her incorrectly positioned eyes prevent her from seeing the true Joel.

Q: Why did the man eat the banana? A: Cuz he was hungry!

Knock, Knock Whos there? Banana Banana Who? Banana i didn't say your moms dead.

Q: How do you make a baby float. A: Put it in a blender and add ice cream.

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What's more fun than nailing a baby to a wall? Pulling it off.

a man rides on his horse to rohde island and back. he rode on Friday and returned on Friday. damn, that's one fat horse

whats on object, almost tube like that squirts thick white liquid from the top elmer's glue

All dogs are mammals. All cats are mammals. Therefore, all dogs are cats.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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