Your mum is so ugly that i make jokes about how ugly she is

What did the golfer do on his vacation? He played golf.

What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? Were both lawyers.

Knock Knock Nobody Nobody who? Nobody, did you not hear what I just said.

Q: Why did Steve fall out of the tree A: He was raking the leaves

The good part of "Age" of Ultron? THANOS REIGNS! Disagree? Just leave the green thumb and fuck off!

did you hear about the little girl who won first place in her school's spelling bee? she was hit by a bus

How did the chewy cross the road ? it was stuck to the chickens foot.

How do you keep an elephant from charging? Ask nicely.

Q: What did the doctor say to his wife? A: Penis.

Why did the camel climb Mount Everest? Actually, he wasn't a camel, he was a very experienced mountain climber. In any case no one really knows why he did it.

Whats long and hard? a baseball bat

Why couldn't the man make it to work? Because as he was leaving his apartment, he saw a gruesome murder on the street that was part of an ever-growing and evolving genocide. Quickly following this, he broke down into psychological turmoil and wandered aimlessly through the streets until he eventually reached a forest, where he was taken in by a wild boar and raised to believe in boar-gods. The man died peacefully while planting potatoes.

What do you call Mexicans who go to jail? Criminals.

A man walks into a bar owned by horses. The bartender says, "Why the short face?"

my own dog bit my penis off, it was then put down. it was the worst day of my life.

There's nothing more natural than the coals under the fire...

Why did the McCann's parent's leave the window's and doors open? Because Portugal is a very hot climate, And they expected the place they were staying to be safe as lot's of tourist's stay there throughout the year.

I see London, I see France. Wow! This high-speed train that travels across Europe is amazing!

Your momma's so fat she has a hard time finding clothes to fit

A horse walks into a bar and the barman asks, "Why the long face?" The horse, being a horse and thus unable to speak or comprehend the complexities of conversation, does not reply and shits on the floor.

Your mamma so fat she bungie jumped straight to hell

3 guys are walking in the woods there are 3 paths they each take a path. the first path lead to a shed that said blowjobs 25 cents the second path lead to the same place after they all made it threw the first guy said he got a blowjob so dose the second guy. the third guy said i made 50 cents

Ernie: "Hey Jim, how many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop?" Jim then breaks down and cries deeply at Ernie's question as the fact that he was born without a tongue continues to slowly tear him apart.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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