Why did the homeless man decide it was time to get off the streets? He wanted to save face.

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Q.who is Tiny, a lion and has no friends and is a bald eagle? A.Rory Johnston

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A paralyzed person walks into a bar.

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*Knock knock* "Who's there?" "Would you mind turning your music down a bit please? I have reports to write."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why don't you ask the chicken. I am sorry but I as a human being am totally incapable of understanding and communicating with chickens.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was a woman.

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What's worse than the WNBA? The Cleveland Cavaliers.

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My friends and family all recommended me for alcoholics anonymous, but all i had to say is that my father didn't raise me to be quitter.

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three white men are running after a black man,, the black man is winning the race

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Chuck Norris.

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Why did the clown fall off the unicycle? Because I shot him in the face.

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A chicken , a dog and a horse walked into a bar. There were going to the vets but were confused.

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Whats the opposite of red? Fish!

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Q: Whats red and not a penis A: A lot of things

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What do you call a zebra eating Cheerios? A zebra eating Cheerios.

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Person A: Knock Knock Person B: Who's there? Person A: It's the police, we have a warrant for your arrest. Open the door. Person B: It's the police, we have a warrant for your arrest, open the door wh-- Suddenly the door is smashed open. Tear gas grenades are rolled in, temporarily blinding Person B. He is then dragged out of his apartment by nine federal agents who proceed to beat him and throw him into the back of an FBI van.

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What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple whilst you're in a bar after finding out you have cancer when you visited your families grave? Having a refrigerator thrown at you by an aids infected monkey with no arms or legs.

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the mountains? A: Bear food.

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Knock knock I'M IN THE BATHROOM !!

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If my wife has got 6 oranges in one hand and 6 apples in the other hand, what has she got? No chance of stopping an uppercut.

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School is like a boner. It is long and hard unless your asian.

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Who cut the cheese? It's sliced so evenly.

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What do Lebron James and Bill Murray have in common? They are both black basketball players. Except for bill murray

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What's oily and smells like smegma? Kevin Crummy

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops