Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock Knock Who's there Not Sally Why can't Sally finish her ice cream She has no arms How do you fit Sally into a box? Put her in a blender. How do you get her out? A straw.

Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the mountains? A: Bear food.

Roses are red Violets are blue My head itches I'm going to get this guy to itch it for me

Blonde: what does IDK stand for? Brunett: i don't know Blonde: NOBODY KNOWS!!!

q- what do you call a small number of black people running away from a large group of white people? a- every marathon known to man...

What do you call a horse with two legs? A kangaroo

What's good about sex with twenty-three year olds? There's twenty of them.

what's the difference between a jew and a bar of soap? You don't rub your nuts with a jew.

Why did the man go to Jupiter? Because he was on a classified space mission for N.A.S.A.

I've got a tip for the ladies. Or if you like I can put the whole thing

I went to the opticians to get my eyes checked. The optician said "you need glasses".

Why did a black man enter a KFC? Because he had been in town a while and had grown hungry over the period of walking around, and decided he should get some food to satisfy his hunger so he may continue his journey around town. The fact he entered KFC is purely coincidental, as he could've easily decided to go to a different eatery, but it just so happens that the closest one was a KFC.

What has four legs and rocks? Your baby kitten that just got stoned to death.

What do you call a person without any arm no legs and a eye patch? names

Doctor! Doctor! There is a fly in my soup! Moral: Huh?

A teacher, a lawyer, and a doctor are all at the edge of the cliff. Then they jump off and die.

Q:What happened when the bear walked into the bar? You cannot answer because you were seriously injured by the bear.

Why don't flowers bite you when you pick them? Cuz they don't have a brain.

how much fish could a chicken

homosexual rights to marriage

Whats worse than biting an apple with a worm in it? Getting stabed until you died and being fed to your own children....... twice

Nero: Farewell to my past last part aka No more forced psychiatric evaluations for me. My psychiatric evaluator asked me why I consider myself a souless demon and not a man. My answer was: My mothers name was Maria, my brothers name is Kristoffer and my real father (which I only met once which was meaningless) is a Chatolic priest. Then I showed her (my psychiatric evaluator) my passport, my name is not Nero Angelo, nor whatever my parents might have told others but rather Angelo Nero. So lets conclude shall we? Nero Angelo = Angel black. and some Capcom shit. Angelo Nero = Says on my birth certificate, means Black Angel. Kristoffer= The sacrifice of Christ my half brother. Ricardo my non real father = which has nothing to do with Josef... Thank F*CK! So yeah, some of you might recognize me, but I have not met any family members the last 16 years, so if you where planing to judge me the next time you see me, you better run instead, because I will... "pacify" you for just watching while my parents waterboarded me, for just standing there while my mother tried excorzise me away while beating the crap out of me. I WILL "remove you, forever" the only family I got, are my 2.755 or so members of my movement Neronism, and my wife`s family, this is not a threat.... ...Its a promise to me, and to you. Make no mistake though, Neronism has over 60.000 members worldwide, but I dont care about them, enough is enough. Maria: My birthmother which claimed long before I was born that she was a virgin and as thus that she was giving birth to the anti-christ. (me, thanks mom) Then my psychiatric evaluator asked me if I truly believed I was a demon, where I told her that "human" is just a term, and that I know that calling myself a demon is just a way of coping with my past. She suggested that now that my troubles/parents are over/dead, that my need for her or anyone evaluating me further is over and she jokingly rated me a 100 percent "fresh" when I asked her if I was still a rotten tomato, so I am officially out from the "realm" of psychiatry (which I was forced to after killing my father in self defense). Its been fucking 27 years since, bt finally I am fucking happy... And the hell if there is humanity left in me... >:) M.Biso... I mean Nero. Merry christmas everybody, I know mine is not so bad after all... ill probably spend more time here, but farewell for now, and finally I can scratch the shit out of my ortopedic arm without getting PTSD`s of my non real father tearing my head off... AAAAAAAAAND all is good... Except the fucking itch...

Your mother is so old, she could easily be considered a senior citizen.

How do you stop a dog from humping your leg? Suck its dick.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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