why did so many people die in the typhoon in the Philippines because they had to finish there math homework

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Q: What did the doctor say to his wife? A: Penis.

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If life gives you lemons, You throw them as hard as you can at the nearest stranger. If life gives you melons, You're probably dyslexic.

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Yo momma so fat, when she walks she wakes the dead -Ryan Vallee

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What did the mom tell her son who she caught masticating loudly? "Do it with your mouth closed!"

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What do you call Mexicans who go to jail? Criminals.

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How many black people does it take to for there to be a murder? None. A murder is a group of crows,not black people.

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Why did the little boy fall off his bike? His mother threw a washing machine at him.

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Why does the kid cries when he sees me? Cuz i took his lollypop last week.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Can you sign for this package? Certainly

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whats white and smells like onions? an onion..

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How do you keep an elephant from charging? Ask nicely.

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did you hear about the little girl who won first place in her school's spelling bee? she was hit by a bus

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A man walks into a bar owned by horses. The bartender says, "Why the short face?"

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What did the Amazonian tribesman say to the European explorer? Nothing, he was focussing on eating him.

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Knock, knock. Now before I asked "Who's there" I first opened the door as then I can see who's there without having to ask them through the door.

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What do you call it when a cigarette is brown instead of white? A cigarette that is or has been damp so that the nicotine was able to bleed into the paper and dye it.

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What did the penis say to the condom? Cover me i'm going in.

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What has four legs in the morning, two legs at noon, and three legs at night? An experimental animal mutilated then exposed to radiation.

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What's brown,green got four legs and can fall out of a tree and kill you? A snooker table.

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An Jewish man worked at a bank, and ate chicken noodles for lunch and then stabbed and man playing the saxophone.

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whats the difference between 10 Ferrari's and 10 dead babies ? i dont have 10 Ferrari's in my garage

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are you MC Donald's because I'm lovin' it!

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There's nothing more natural than the coals under the fire...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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