Friend's are like pinguins, they both die when you stab them in the heart.

If a red house has red bricks, and a yellow house has yellow bricks, what colour of bricks does a greenhouse have? Greenhouses are made of glass.

Whats a never ending Opium for the stupid, mentally depraved un educated population? Christianity

american idol

How can you tell the difference between a cow? One says moo

what do you call a blonde skeleton in the closet? last years hide and go seek champion

How many Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

What's worse than stubbing your toe? Slavery.

Why was sally crying? She could hear her parents having sex.

What did David's mom give him for his birthday? Nothing he hasn't seen her in eight years.

You know what rhymes with sloth? Rape.

What's big, black, and impossible to swallow? A parking lot. Among many other things.

What did the boy with four arms get for Christmas? A Laptop. Why couldn't he use it? He had no fingers.

My life has been getting worse and worse since I developed cancer.

What's funnier than a pile of dead babies? A pile of dead babies with a live one crawling out.

Want to hear a joke? Too bad.

A jew walk's into a bar. But actually it was a Gas chamber.

What ryhmes with turtle? räpe

Why did the Chicken become a medium? To talk to the other side.

Whats black and blue and red all over? An infant after its been beaten with a bat.

Good friends are like snowflakes. They disappear when you pee on them.

Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: One.

"Knock-knock." "Come in, sorry that the doorbell is broken."

Why did the chicken cross the road? For a legitimate reason

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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