Q: A man walked into a bar and said, "Ouch!" Why? A: The man walked into a METAL bar.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Joe Barkley. Joe Barkley who? ...

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What do you call a black man on the moon An astronaut

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What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas? Love and attention from his parents.

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What's worse than being raped? Finding out it was your uncle.

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so a man walks into a store looking for a new sheet,the cashier he goes to is chinese He leaves with a new sheet and is satisfied with it,oh wait,he gave me a pile of shit,sorry guys i had to -chuckles

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What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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What is worse than torturing, "forcibly penetrate" and then slowly and painfully kill nine billion people? The Holocaust?

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Why did the kid poop his pants? He was a baby

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my parents let me say words that start with sh and end in it. shit what else could it be

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Der Ter-Rerks, nern ter serrentersts ers "Terernerserers Rerks", wers er dernerser dert lerved ern der Certersers perrerd. Ert wers er mert erter, prering ern smerler, plernt-erterng dernersers serch ers herdrersers ernd serrerperds. Ert erser hernterd der herned herberver Tersererterps, werd erverderns erf ferts ferned ern der ferserlersed rermerns.

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There was a little boy and a little girl in a bathtub having a bath. Suddenly the little girl looked down at the boy. "Can I touch it?" "No way -- you already broke yours off!"

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? He had no arms Why couldnt he get up? He had no legs What did the boy get for Christmas? Cancer What did the boy get for Easter? A funeral Knock, knock Who's there? Not the boy.

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Person: hey buddy have you heard the greteat news Freind: yea you have aids Person: no my wife jusr became a pristatue an she had ten patients already i was her first

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Why did the horse say moo? Because it's a cow

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? The Mexican blind cave tetra (Astyanax mexicanus).

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman

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What is green and red and flies 100 miles an hour? Super Frog.

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Whats the hardest part of a vegetable to eat?? The WheelChair

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This is Axel, if you are who I think you are, you are late.

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What's the difference between an iPhone and a Samsung Galaxy? Google it, there are many differences.

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Your mmma is so stupid when we said the drinks were in the house. She went looking for them!

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Justin Bieber's gay!! My butt is sexier!(;

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Tulips are white and Pansies are pink.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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