Knock knock Whos there? Knock knock Who's there? Knock knock Who's there?! "is anyone home this is Helan Keller"

What do Justin Bieber and corn have in common? They are both fruits. Except for the corn.

YO MAMA SO SHORT she should really consider wearing long tunic-like blouses, prints that contain vertical stripes, and heeled shoes with a pointed toe in order to create the illusion of length to her silhouette. That having been said, society's limited definition of beauty is quite inadequate for the diverse world in which we live.

Peas

What happens when you tickle a rabid iguana? It bites you and you die.

Whats long, green and falls out of trees? A canoe. Why did the old man fall out of the tree? He was in the canoe.

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You set the alarm for a reasonable time. - Louis

If i was given a penny every time i hear "It's not my fault". I will have the money equal to the nominal price multiplied by the count of times i heard that phrase.

wanna hear a sad joke? you! by mad james

Why did the man go to Jupiter? Because he was on a classified space mission for N.A.S.A.

Whats the difference between a black man and a bucket of shit? The bucket.

Why did the retarded man fail his math test? He didn't study.

What did the cat say to the dog? Miaow. What did the dog say to the cat? Miaow.

An invisible man sleeping in your bed! Who ya gunna call? Most likely the local police department to report the strange incident possibly brought on by lack of sleep. NOT Bill Murray.

who lives a pineapple under the sea? a proper spazztwat.

How did the carpenter do on his exam? Poorly so his parents killed him.

Roses are stools, Violets are bums, sugar is knit, thank you, LSD.

what did the dog say to the cat? nothing cause animals dont talk.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got a smoke dectecter, You died in a fire

Why did the African boy die? He was denied any antibiotics to heal his severe case of mono and AIDS, and was living on dirty water and dirt.

Why couldn't the baby play with the blocks? It died during birth.

How does a black man spell Jack J-A-C-K

Hellen Kellers dad put a plunger in the toiler and left it there. Hellen Keller went to use the bathroom and.. moved the plunger so she could take a shit.

what did the penguin use as a napkin? a napkin

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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