Whats black and white and red all over? My wife, i constantly beat her and I should probably be arrested for it if she didnt love me so much

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whats the same between a mouse and an elephant? They are both small except for the elephant

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Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, But the very next day, I died.

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Why couldn't the black man get out of jail? He couldn't post his bond.

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What did Elmer Fudd say when Bugs Bunny got away again? "Oh, dat dawn wabbit, I'ww get it some day".

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why couldn't the girl watch t.v? Because her house burned down

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What do you call a black priest? Holy shit.

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You grand mothers so old she going to die soon.

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What happened when the boy stood up? He had all his limbs hacked off and soon after died.

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You can pick your friends you can pick your nose but you cant pick your friends nose.

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How did leatherface cut a tree when he lost his chainsaw? He just asked a friendly neighbor to borrow him a axe

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How are elephants and plumbs the same? A: They are both purple, except for the elephant.

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What do you call a german soldier? A Nazi

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A blond, burnette, and red head walk into a bar. They sit together and enjoy a few drinks while catching up on eachother's lives.

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Youu might be a Jew if you........take part in a weekly service at your local synagogue.

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Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

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Two men and a woman go to lunch together at a restaurant in New York City. The first man says, "I'm glad that we're finally doing this." The second man says, "Yeah, me too." The woman concurs.

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what is the different between a prostitute and your wife one is on contract and the other pay as you go

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So mind telling me why you wont call me? And why, you know... Are you avoiding this condition of yours?

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You can lead a fool to wisdom, but you can't make him think.

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What do you call a murderer who killed a black man. kkk

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? Nothing his parents died in a tragic car accident the night before

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What do you say to a woman with two black eyes? Nothing, you've already taken her police statement and she doesn't want to discuss the incidentit anymore until her lawyer arrives.

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How does a person with Alzheimers' poem go? Roses are red, Roses are red, Roses are red, Wait, what was I doing?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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