What is square, brown, and smells funny? A box with a dead body in it.

Why did the all black baseball team beat the all white baseball team? Because the black team scored more runs than the white team.

Whats black and blue and red all over? An infant after its been beaten with a bat.

Why did the black man cross the road? He was going to meet up with his friend who happened to be Irish.

So I have an idea that will solve both world population and hunger problems! I call it the Omni-Abortion law. The idea is that all babies must be aborted and then eaten. Progressive, right?

Roses are red Violets are blue You're parents are dead All your friends are too

So, what happens when Germany attacks France? France proceeds to slaughter the attackers mercilessly, as it was during the Feudal Ages, a time when France was Europe's superpower.

What did the frog say when it was attacked? Ribbit.

When I see the Viagra commercial telling you about all the side effects and they say "if you have an erection lasting for more than 4 hours, call a doctor." If I have an erection that lasts that long, I'm not calling a doctor. I'm calling my mom; who I always call when I'm sick.

What's funny about Magic Johnson's T-Cell count? Nothing. He has AIDS, and it's a degenerative disease, that will eventually result in death. There's nothing funny about that.

How do you make a boy cry? Pour soup on his head.

Q: How many teenagers does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they just sit in the dark and complain about it.

Q:What's colorful and waves like a flag? A: A flag.

What looks like a black book but is actually white? I don't know because it can't look like a black book if it's white.

Knock knock. USE THE DOORBELL!

Whats worse then walking into a door? getting shot in the head by a 10ft squirrel holding 44.magnum and a slice of cheese in the other

An armadillo walks into a bar, and shouts "I hear you don't serve armadillos." "That is correct," the bartender replies.

My dad calls me a son of a bitch and I'm like "hey! You married her"

What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot you racist! Jk a terrorist

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To get to the other side

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Pansies are purple, Nothing rhymes with purple.

A black guy, a mexican, and an arab are all in the same car, Whos driving the car? The black guy because he politely offered and his friends were happy to ride with him.

The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft by pulling down on one or both of the red tabs.

What did the mother say to her son when she saw his report card? I don't know. I wasn't there.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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