What did the mute say to the deaf man? Nothing becasue a mute is a person who cannot speak and a deaf man ould not hear the jumbled mumblings anyway.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you call a horny blond on the corner? A prostitute

thumb_up thumb_down -2

wanna hear a sad joke? you! by mad james

thumb_up thumb_down -4

"So, what do you fancy doing tonight?" "Does it matter? We'll end up doing what you want anyway..."

thumb_up thumb_down -4

yo Dawg I heard you like dogs... So I sent yo ass to prison and got an NFL contract

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Is it a ironic if a man with ADD is driving a Ford Focus?

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Q. What did the barber say to the Italian kid? A. Do you want your hair cut or should I just change the oil.?

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Who's a tool and a NARC? Josh Brami!

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the black man steal an inhaler? Because he was broke and he had asthma.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why couldn't Cait walk her dog? She's been paralyzed from the waist down since she was 5 after her and her parents got into a car accident and her parents died.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Out of Jill, Jason, Jesse, Jane and Harold, which one is the odd one out? Jason, because he only has one arm.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

I'm gay Mr Goodwin

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Sosiopath vs How I met your mother: BABABABABA BABABA RARARA LALALA ETC YOU GOT THE DRILL Kids, this is how I met your mother. I saw her at some store, I said "Hey sexy" She told me to fuck off, so I raped her, got out of prison years later, and kids, that is how I met your mother. ...Why I am leaving? Did I ever fucking say I was your father? I Just came here to tell you I raped and killed her after serving my time which was about 2 minutes, so kids, that is how I killed your mother. YOU ARE WELCOME BY THE WAY!Ungrateful kids. Moral of the story: If they are your kids, just say no and get away, and kill Robin for better television. Sociopath vs Grounded for life Moral: Shot the little kid, nobody will notice, not even his own family.Heck if you look at episode 34 you can see a tall handsome dude choking the life of a little boy in the background, and then letting him go just before he passes out and chokes him again? FUN FOR HOURS!

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Bugs dance, so do ants, Oh my glob it’s Adventure Time!

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How did Debbie get a black eye? Because her dad asked her to take off her pants and she refused so he beat her

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Hellen Kellers dad put a plunger in the toiler and left it there. Hellen Keller went to use the bathroom and.. moved the plunger so she could take a shit.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Q: What has no color, no shape, no size, and was born in your mind? A: The thought you just had about this anti-joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A little girl meets a homeless guy named Ian McDermott in downtown Atlanta She then screams stranger danger and a nearby policeman comes and arrests the man.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Daughter: Mom can i watch a movie? Mom: Sure. Daughter: Thanks mom! You're the best mom in the world! Well....Mary is, since she had Jesus.....But anyway. Thanks!

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the clown's ballon animal pop? He was a victim in a drive by shooting.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

what looks like a bananna but is blue a blue bananna

thumb_up thumb_down -4

what do you do when life gives you lemons? take them, free shit is cool!

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why couldn't the Egyptian pharaoh solve the Rubik's Cube? He didn't know how.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops