Why is five afraid of six? Because six seven eight. (Note: The language of numbers is Subject-Object-Verb, rather than Subject-Verb-Object like English.)

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Why did the girl fall of the swing? I hit her with an axe.

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Excuse me. Oh, would you mind hitting the 15th floor button for me? Thanks.

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How many beavers does it take to paint a house blue? 0, beavers cant paint.

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people say i have big feet but you know what the say about people with big feet? :) big socks. sl

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Guns don't kill people, books kill trees.

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How did the American man get the Mexican man to jump over the wall? He didn't, after several attempts he then got a ladder and climbed over.

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How many psychiatrists does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One, usually.

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What did the little boy with cancer get for his birthday .............. Nothing because he died before his birthday

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What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

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One a upon of time there was man named Cinderella. He was so mad because his name was Cinderella. The end.

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What do we call the science of classifying living things? Racism

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There are two parrots sitting on a perch. One parrot says to the other parrot, "Do you smell fish?"

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Do You Know You Have Cancer?

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So two men were drinking beer and one asks "Why are you so sad today, Lenny?" The other man replies "Because I was just diagnosed leukemia." Four days later Lenny dies and his body was buried at Cherryhill Cemetery where his family mourned over his death.

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knock knock who's there? F uck F uck who? F uck off

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being ripped apart by an angry orangatang because orangatangs have the strength of ten men.

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Reality is often boring. TV is often bad for you. Reality TV is boring AND bad for you.

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What do you do when you come across a dead baby? Add it to your collection.

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What did you say? I'm blind. (Did not write this meaning to be offensive)

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Q:Why didn't the Mexican get out of the box? A:Because he liked it in the box.

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What happened when the man fell off the boat? He went into the water and was viciously mauled by 5 alligators then ran over by another boat.

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What do you get when you cross a stream with a prostitute? A wet hooker.

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What happened when Glen jumped off a building? The rope snapped his neck. He died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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