Why did the girl fall of the swing? I hit her with an axe.

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Guns don't kill people, books kill trees.

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What did the little boy with cancer get for his birthday .............. Nothing because he died before his birthday

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Excuse me. Oh, would you mind hitting the 15th floor button for me? Thanks.

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people say i have big feet but you know what the say about people with big feet? :) big socks. sl

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A bear walks into a bar. The bear is then shot by the bartender with the shotgun kept under the counter.

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If life throws you lemons, get under some shelter so you don't get pelted by flying fruit and worry about making lemonade later.

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What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

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Why is five afraid of six? Because six seven eight. (Note: The language of numbers is Subject-Object-Verb, rather than Subject-Verb-Object like English.)

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How many psychiatrists does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One, usually.

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knock knock who's there? F uck F uck who? F uck off

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So two men were drinking beer and one asks "Why are you so sad today, Lenny?" The other man replies "Because I was just diagnosed leukemia." Four days later Lenny dies and his body was buried at Cherryhill Cemetery where his family mourned over his death.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being ripped apart by an angry orangatang because orangatangs have the strength of ten men.

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Reality is often boring. TV is often bad for you. Reality TV is boring AND bad for you.

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What happened when the man fell off the boat? He went into the water and was viciously mauled by 5 alligators then ran over by another boat.

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What do you do when you come across a dead baby? Add it to your collection.

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Q:Why didn't the Mexican get out of the box? A:Because he liked it in the box.

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What did you say? I'm blind. (Did not write this meaning to be offensive)

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What's the difference between a black person and a pizza? Pizza is a type of food.

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Whats 9 plus 10? 19

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really? are people insistantly so totally stupid? Now read that again and you may notice something. :P

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Your mother is so stupid that she had to study, a lot.

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What is lil Wayne's real name? Dwayne micheal carter jr.

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What's the best way to toss a salad? With a salad spinner from the home shopping network.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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