Three guys walk into a bar. The four man hastily ducks, grabs his phone and calls the local paramedic.

Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No neither has he.

God is real.

Why was the man upset? Both sides of his pillow were warm.

"What's black when clean, but white when dirty?" "A blackboard."

Why can't hank swim? Hank is a rock.

Q:Whats the difference between Glenn Close and a black widow? A:one is a person, the other is a species of spider.

What did the penguin say to the polar bear? Nothing, penguins haven't evolved a complex form of language.

Why did the aisian man get pulled over? Because he was going over the speed limit .

Keith figured gasoline burns, doesn't it? He was wrong.

What do u when life gives u lemons? U put them in your iced tea.

Why was the Saudi Arabian terrorist flying a plane in America? He was going to visit some family on a ranch in Kansas.

Hey I just met you and this is crazy but here's my chew toy throw it maybe!

Why do people on this website suck? Because they are n i g g e r s and jews!

What do you call Jack Black on a bad day? Kevin Hart.

How do you put your babysitter in jail? Kill your kid on her shift.

Why did the chicken cross the road? If you don't know the answer by now, there's something wrong with you.

a jewish person sees a nickel on a sidewalk and continues walking.

Jesus Christ

What's worse then getting followed by a creepy man in a van? Getting followed and raped by a creepy man in a van.

Miss Jones has 10 apples on her desk. Billy takes half of them away and runs. What does Miss Jones have? 5 apples and a complaint filed for smacking Billy with a ruler.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue Your Adopted Deal With It!!!

Why did nobody answer when billy knocked on the door? The door was a loaf of bread.

What makes George Michael gay? The fact he engages in sexual intercourse with other men.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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