Your mamma so fat she bungie jumped straight to hell

knock knock Goodbye

a boy scout wipes his butt with a dollar cause he had no toilet paper then the other boy scout hears him screaming they meet up later and the other boy scout askes why he was scream and the first boy scout says that is hard to wip your butt with 4 quarters.

why did Timmy fall off the the slide? he was hit by a plane why was Jimmy laughing? he watched Timmy get hit by the plane

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. The chicken was booted into the air by a screaming Russian osselot.

I got 99 problems, and most of them involve my terminal illness.

how many large people can you fit in a bath tub ... 1/16

Q: What is the difference between a jew and a pizza? A: The pizza does not scream in the oven.

A Priest a Rabbi and a duck walk into a bar. The rest of the patrons continue to drink until the situation seems less strange.

so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

A black, Kenyan man enters a race. He comes in second to last as he didn't practice as much as the other contestants.

Two boys go down stairs on christmas day. They fall and die.

How many black basketball players does it take to change a lightbulb? One. They're all rather tall therefore they can reach the light source with ease.

This is SPARTA! SPARTA? THIS IS MADNESS! (kicks guy down well) What is hurt! Baby dont love me, dont love me, no more. Moral: The funny thing is probably that the line makes a lot more sense all of sudden does it not?

Knock knock Who's there? Dave, I've got a fucking gun. Let me the fuck in.

Why was the black man arrested? He was tried and convicted in a court of law for being an accessory to murder.

knock knock who's there ... '*Opens the door slowly* SUPRISE BUTT SEX!

A man felt a pain in his stomach. He went to the doctor.

There once lived a man in Peru. He lived in a small apartment then died of kidney failure.

Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

What did the boy with no legs get for his birthday? A bike

How many dyslexic people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Filing cabinet.

Fun Fact: If you lay out all of the veins in your body out, You will die

Have you ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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