knock knock. Who is there? You have. You have who? Your entire family in my basement.

Deja moo: The feeling you've heard this bull before.

How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Only one, but he may forget to finish the task due to his Alzheimer's.

Q. What did the chinease man say when he got flattened by a plane? A. Nothing, he died instantly.

I wondered why the piano was getting bigger. Then it hit me... I'm sorry I have visual agnosia

Q. How many trees does it take to change a light bulb? A. Trees can't change light bulbs.

Black, I dont know if you are kidding around or something, but I cant reach you on the phone pal, I am really sorry about the Valium, it was like only 10 milligrams pal, I mean please man, it was a joke, and Ill break up with Line anyways, I mean Alex and Petter are sorry too okay? Just take the phone, ill be there soon, I mean come on, you are the most cruel person I know, lets talk about it

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He got hit in the head with a brick.

Q: What's orange, hairy, and covered with gasoline? A: Definitely not a chair.

Why did the lion get lost? Because the jungle is massive

69.

A man walks into a bar. He bumps his head on the iron and has headaches for a week.

What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? Boy Scouts come back from camp.

Wanna hear a joke? Zeke friends Wanna hear a better jokes? Zeke with his friends

Why didn't the 1 month old chicken cross the road? Because by that time it's already a Mcnugget.

What is white and can't climb trees? Toothpaste.

Roses are red Violets are blue Last but not least, Bananas are yellow.

Q: what's worse than getting the flu? A: getting cancer

Q: How did the dead baby get to the other side of the road? A: I threw it over there.

Knock Knock Who's There? Poop. Poop who? HAHAHAHAHAHA you said poopoo

Why can't Timmy go on any rollercoasters? Because he's morbidly obese and it would a safety hazard.

There once lived a man in Peru. He lived in a small apartment then died of kidney failure.

Two gay guys are cuddling in a park when they spot a hot, busty blonde jogging near them. One turns to the other and says, "Damn... It's days like this I wish I was a lesbian."

An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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