An Atheist sneezed. Everyone around him said, "God bless you." He thanked them and continued on with his day.

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Roses are red, lemons are sour, open your legs and give me an hour.

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yo momma!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11

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What did the pig do when the farmer died? He just stood there cause pigs are stupid.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was suicidal.

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How do you kill a blonde? Tell her she can breath underwater.

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Q: What has four eyes but can't see? A: A blind guy with glasses

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You know what makes jokes funny? Irony You know what makes anti-jokes funny? Common sense

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Q: What's the difference between a trampoline and a baby? A: I take off my shoes when I jump on a trampoline.

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Ok is 25 really funnier than 24 because i think 8008 or 5318008 are way funnire tahn 24 or 35 just saying

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poo

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar. He orders a drink successfully, pays, and leaves. Three weeks later he dies tragically.

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Why do deer have horns? Because god made them that way.

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Why did the water in the lake disappear? There was a toilet at the bottom.

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Billy: Why do pirates say rrrrr? Mark: I don't know, I'm not a pirate.

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Where do you find a dead hooker? where you left her.

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why is ur dad an alcoholic? he drinks a lot of alcohol

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A Mexican, a Chinese man, and a cowboy are on a plane. The plane is crashing, and they need to get rid of anything to make the plane lighter so thet can glide to safety. The cowboy throws out all of his boots and says we have to many of these. Then the Mexican throws out all of his taco shells and says we have to many of these. Then the Chinese man throws out the Mexican and says we have to many of these.(:

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Why did the Mexican sneak across the US border? There aren't many good jobs for him in Mexico, and with the cost of living in his small village, he will be able to provide for his entire family of seven on just minimum wage in California. He will miss his family terribly while he is away from them, but he believes it is worth it in the end. Once he saves enough, he will pay the coyotes to smuggle the rest of his family over so they can be together again. Hopefully none of them will die on the journey.

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What did one muffin say to the other Muffin? Nothing, muffins have no method of communication in any way shape or form

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Why was the black man running? he was participating in race for the cure, a charity event where all proceeds go to breast cancer awareness.

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Why did the rapper carry an umbrella? Because the weather report said there was a 90% chance of rain, and he didn't want to get his posh new coat wet on the way to the studio

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Whats Green and Smells Like Grass? Grass

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? A bench is an inanimate object and a Mexican is a human being.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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