what do you call a shitty anti-joke? A shitty anti-joke.

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Why did the Jew pick up the quarter on the sidewalk? Because he was going to buy a candy bar and was short 25 cents.

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The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw them.

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Whats big and blue and white and if it falls from a tree its sure to kill you. A fridge with a denim jacket on.

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? You'd run away too if someone left the gate open and you happened to be a dog.

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Why was the black man arrested? He was tried and convicted in a court of law for being an accessory to murder.

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Who won the championship last year? There was no championship

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hat did the fridge say to the oven your hot baby \

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A family walks into a talent agency. Talen agent says "Okay, what's your act called?" Dad replies "The Aristocrats!"

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Mam: Wanna hear a joke about my penis?... nevermind, it's to long. Woman: wanna hear a joke about my vagina?... nevermind, u wouldn't get it.

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whats the difference between a frog and a toad ones a frog

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how do you kill justin bieber? put a bag over his head and suffercate him.

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why was the little boy crying? he was at his mother's funeral.

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How do prevent a nun from walking through a revolving door? Put a spear through her head.

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Confucius says, I hear and I forget. I see and I remember. I do and I understand.

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Two muffins are in the oven They didn't say anything.

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Did you hear about the kidnapping in Pennsylvania? He woke up...

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What time is it in Florida? Time To Eat The President Of The United States!

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What do you get when you see a black man writing? A man devoted to getting a education.

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What happened to the man that walked into the bar... He walked into the bar

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Why was the Mexican sleeping? He wishes to decrease his risk of motor vehicle accidents.

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why did the teacher quit her job and become a musician? Because her class was very mean to her and growing up she had always wanted to play music

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Roses are red, Violets are red, OH SHIT MY GARDENS ON FIRE

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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