Why was sally crying? She could hear her parents having sex.

What did Han Solo say to Chewy before they got in the Millennium Falcon? Chewy, get in the ship.

You know what rhymes with sloth? Rape.

I used to be addicted to soap, but now I'm clean. I'm still addicted to heroin, though. No chance I'm ever giving that up.

What's black and white and red all over? A newspaper. No. A nun with a terrible nosebleed. Nobody ever reads the whole newspaper.

My life has been getting worse and worse since I developed cancer.

What did the boy with four arms get for Christmas? A Laptop. Why couldn't he use it? He had no fingers.

What's funnier than a pile of dead babies? A pile of dead babies with a live one crawling out.

A jew walk's into a bar. But actually it was a Gas chamber.

What does a gay horse eat? Low-energy foods should only be fed to horses who are not regularly being worked and participating in high performance. According to the University of Kentucky's College of Agriculture, energy is vital to horses who need to perform their best as it aids many of the body's functions including muscle contraction, respiration and circulation. Only feed a low-energy diet to an idle horse and feed a high-energy diet to an older or sickly horse and to a working horse.

Want to hear a joke? Too bad.

I wish there were a city named Sample. So that the sign can say "Urine Sample"

What's the best way to get high without doing drugs? Jump.

Roses are grey Violettes are grey I am colour blind And I suck at rhymes

Why is 6 afraid of 7? 7 is a terrorist.

What's worse than a wet sock? Being molested as a child.

Whats black and blue and red all over? An infant after its been beaten with a bat.

what do grown up's do at night when everyone lese is asleep? Go to sleep as well

Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: One.

"Knock-knock." "Come in, sorry that the doorbell is broken."

Good friends are like snowflakes. They disappear when you pee on them.

Why did the Chicken become a medium? To talk to the other side.

What ryhmes with turtle? räpe

What is the difference between my pet goldfish and an african village? My pet goldfish has water.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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