A guy is at a party and he's really thirsty, so he goes to get a drink. He goes to get some soda, but the line is too long. He goes to get some water, but the line is also too long. He goes to get some punch, and it turns out there's no punch line.

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Why did John get hard? He froze to death

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Q. What do you call a man with a shovel in his head? A. An ambulance due to the fact that he has a rather serious head wound.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Tulips are white and Pansies are pink.

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What did the stick of butter say to the lemon? "I'm a stick of butter"

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Why did the Mexican cross the border? To get into the USA for a better lifestyle.

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How does micheal Jackson know when it's bed time? When the big hand touches the little hand.

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Why did the family sue disney? Because at a meet and greet location mickey mouse shot their youngest in the heart.

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Some people are like Slinkies: they don't work as well as they say they will and you'll get bored of them quickly.

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What is funny about a man who chews tobacco? Nothing, the man was diagnosed with mouth cancer at a young age and got his jaw removed, he was very upset.

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A clown attends a childs birthday party. He molests 4 children and kills the others. Then leaves.

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Next Q: What's worse than a bee sting? A: Two bee stings. Q: What's worse than two bee stings? A: Three bee stings. Q: What's worse than three bee stings? A: Sexual assault.

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Q why did the girl scream A she got hit with an axe

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How do you know you're crazy? Consult the pink pheasent to your left

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Q. What's yellow and looks like a duck? A. a baby duck

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What do you call a black teen on Maury Povich? A mother.

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What is the difference between my pet goldfish and an african village? My pet goldfish has water.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had two penises.

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Why did the man kill his friend? How am I supposed to know

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Why did the Chicken become a medium? To talk to the other side.

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What did the fat kid eat for dinner? Salad, he's on a diet.

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What fruit is used to make apple juice? Apples

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A Black man, and Jewish man, and a Asian man walk into a bar. They then proceed to buy a drink, leave the bar, and move on with their day.

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What's green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it could kill you? A pool table

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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