A man walks into the office for an appointment. The doctor performs the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

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Why did Doris need a hip replacement Because she fell down the stairs

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Why couldn't the melons get married? As gay cantaloupes, their jurisdiction didn't allow for same-sex marriage.

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why did the kid strike out in baseball he had leprosy and his arms were amputated

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Why did the man feel like he was flying? Because he had just committed suicide by jumping off of a tall building.

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What did Helen Keller say? Obcojbcidjbcidjbdijcbd

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I once heard a funny joke, it was as funny as a funeral

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How can you get an asian kid to flunk a class? You can't.

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What do you call 5 black people being killed in a car crash? A terrible incident

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roses are red. violetss are black. a knife would go good in your back

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How do you know there's an elephant in your refrigerator? Look at your refrigerator.

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What song does the lady camel sing to seduce male camels - my humps my humps my humps my humps How did sergay the camel respond? -we dont know. He died a fatal death involving hippos in hula skirts, and flying guavas

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Why isn't Michael Jackson good at chess? Because he's dead.

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why was the Jewish person accused of stealing money? because the police found his finger prints.

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What do u call a white hourse with no ass Penelope

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How do you kill a diabetic? Take away their insuline

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A duck walks into a bar. The bartender asks the duck "What'll it be?" The duck doesn't respond because it's a duck and it can't talk.

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Why did the monk shave his head? So he's more aerodynamic.

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Women.

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My Penis is so big. How big is it? If you lay my penis down beside another similarly lengthy object, approximately 10" long, it would most likely surpass the length of the object you chose to measure it to.

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Knock Knock Who's there? A Crazy Rhinoceros

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Why did the asian man crash? He fell asleep after a long 18 hour day of driving, plus he was listening to soothing soul music.

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Why did the communist fail his history class? Because he didn't study hard enough.

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Roses are red Oranges are orange Nothing rhymes with orange Forever alone

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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