My grandma told me to always keep my head up and just keep going. She fell down a manhole last week and died.

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A handicapped man walks into a bar...

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Whats slower than molasses? Slightly thicker molasses.

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How do unwed mothers celebrate Mother's Day? The same way all mothers do.

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Whats the difference between Osama and Obama? The S is replaced with a B.

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What's worse then getting followed by a creepy man in a van? Getting followed and raped by a creepy man in a van.

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what did the man say to the person he hates? nothing!

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You know what's funny with rape? Nothing. It's horror.

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An elephant walks into a bar. Several people are trampled.

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Why is the boy sad? He was getting bullied so he later on talked to a teacher and the bully and him settled their differences. The bullied boy still wishes the bully to go to hell.

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Guy 1: (to guy 2) Close your eyes, stand on one leg, spin around, and yell "I have never eaten a cucumber!". Guy 2: No. Guy 1: Ok.

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Why can't hank swim? Hank is a rock.

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What happens when you tickle a rabid iguana? It bites you and you die.

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You arrive in the middle east. What is the first thing that you want to do? Leave

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Why did the man go to Jupiter? Because he was on a classified space mission for N.A.S.A.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No neither has he.

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Two polar bears are sitting in a bathtub. The first polar bear says, "Pass the soap." The second polar bear replies, "No soap, radio." OMG YOU DON'T GET IT?!?!?!?! NOOB

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Why was the man happy to see his wife dead? He beat her

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Why did the german killed the jew? Because he was nazi.

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In Soviet Russia, this type of joke would be considered evidence to throw you into the gulag.

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What's the difference between your dog and your mother? Your dog doesn't think you're a disgrace to the family

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Why am I constipated? I ate fiber glass insulation.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got a smoke dectecter, You died in a fire

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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