A man walks to his coathanger and shouts: "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!" his wife says not to because the Rapist 'Eggman' was out again. He says he will be careful. On his way to the store, he hears "They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggen-" but the man shouts "AND I'M THE WALRUS, SO SHUT UP AND GET OUTTA MY FACE OR I'LL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" Rapist and the singer became friends and found two more from Liverpool who were excellent musicians. They formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band's breakup.

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what did one apple say to another apple nothing apples cant talk

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If your Jewish, then don't go to Germany.

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What do you call a bug stepped on 47 times, then burned to a crisp? Dead

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The man walked into the church and stayed there.

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And now a word from our sponsors

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What did the shy guy say at the speech? Nothing

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What's the difference between acne and Michael Jackson? One is a an unsightly blemish that appears on your skin and the other is a dead pop singer.

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Why did God create Ebola? Because he hates us all.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because on the other side of the road people don't question his motives

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how do u get a bonar? u look at your mum!!

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Take part of what?

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How do you get through a locked door? Unlock it.

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If you have a dinosaur, how many bicycles do you need to do your homework? Yes, because chewing gums would ask if Greg can go to the handball match.

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Knock Knock? Why did you just say knock knock just ring the doorbell

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Why did Hayden Bryant walk down the street? Because he can, dont doubt Hayden Bryant.

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there once was a little boy who lived in a little house with his little parents who ate little food. one day the boy went on a website called antijokes and he started to read a joke, by the time he had gotten to the end of the joke he realized that there was no punchline but it was very lenghty and quite pointless.

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Why did the Democrat cross the road? Because the glorious leader ordered it for all minions

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Roses are read, Violets are blue, I have aids, now so do you

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Why did the black man go to portugal? Because he was very hard working and needed a vacation.

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kara is funny she loves her money so she buys a bunny for her honey

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Why don't some black men have jobs? Because they won't work

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Why did the plane crash? Because the engine wasnt working.

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Who has two thumbs and lost them? Me but I can't really point at myself due to the lack of thumbs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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