What do pebbles and Batman have in common. They're both pebbles. Except Batman.

Is Mike here? Mike Hunt? Has anyone seen Mike Hunt? Yes teacher, he is home sick with the flu.

A cowboy walks in to a bar and says to the guy behind the counter "Can I have a glass of water?". The bar tender shot a gun and missed the cowboy by an inch. The cowboy said thanks. Why? Because the cowboy had the hiccups

Why did the scientist go to the hospital? because he was experimenting with dangerous chemicals, and they exploded in his unsuspecting face. He doesn't have skin now.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because, it realized that it was worth something in life, it had a meaning, a purpose, and a right to freedom, to go where it pleased. The chicken's first act of this freedom was to go across the street.

Roses are grey. Violets are a different shade of grey. Let's go chase cars. -Dog

Why did the baby cross the road? he was taped to the chicken

This is not a joke, I'm just bored (or am I?)

A blonde, brunette, and a redhead are taking a chemistry exam. They each get a solid B on the test.

Neo Nero, why did you not tell me that Nero7 is dead? When was the funeral held? Where is he buried? At point Zero? Please I need to know, he was basically my father, or rather all that my father never was, at least I dont have to wonder if he will ever come back... I understand your anger, even if I am not even close to following your extreme ideals, please tell me the code, the proof that you are not one of the Spetznas or the Nazi`s. "Eliza"

What do you call an alligator in a circus? Testicular Cancer.

I just wrote three jokes on antijoke.com ... nope, make that four.

Why did the man eat his own shoe? Because it was a tissue box.

Why did the slut suck a dick? Because she's a slut.

What do you call a white guy pointing a gun at someone? A member of the United States Army.

what's blue and looks like a shirt? a blue shirt

What's blue and invisible ? Nothing.... Its impossible to be iinvisible and a color

What did Hellen Keller say to her baby cousin? Nothing

A man walks into a bar........ gets eaten by a lion.

Why did the black man offer the girl flowers? It was his niece's birthday.

What starts with f and ends in u-c-k? a:****

Nero7 How are you doing? This is "Eliza" I hope I will be joining, but I cannot reach you by phone, please respond ASAP time is running out.

Once upon a time a was born

Mail Man: *Knocks on door* Guy & Girl: WHAT?! *laughing* Mail Man: Mail! Guy & Girl: Hold on she is almost done with the whip cream.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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