How do you get children to behave? Chop them up.

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What did the woman say when she ate crabs. This smells like my vagina (This women died slowly from crabs)

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What's worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

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What's worse than requesting a three-some to your in-laws? Forgetting to suggest that they me too fragile and disabled, resulting in one of their limbs breaking.

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A rabi a priest and a gay guy are praying. The rabi says amen the priest says amen the gay guy says ahh men.

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What's worse than eating half a worm? Eating somebody's brain.

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Why didnt the boy go to school? His mum threw a fridge at him!

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Patient: "Doctor, my arm hurts when I poke it with my index finger." Doctor: "That's because your finger is broken."

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A kid walks into the car and the dad says, "Wear your seatbelt".

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"Have you heard the skyscraper joke?" "No." "Oh. Well I don't feel like telling it to you."

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Why did the cat cross the street? It didn't. I cut off its arms and legs so it couldn't walk.

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How do you kill someone? Shoot them. How do you kill someone with a knife? Shoot them How do you kill someone in a car? Shoot them How do you kill someone in a jet? Put the gun in the propeller

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A man and his wife go out to dinner, after dinner they return home safely and the man kisses his wife good night. He then leaves his house, and goes to a bar with another women. He is a polygamast and it is socially acceptable in his town.

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One morning a guilty man reluctantly told his wife he was having an affair. After a long awkward silence they were then abducted by aliens.

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how many baby's does it take to paint a wall?? depends how hard u throw them

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How do you get Suzy to get off the swing? Ask her to move.

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Why was the black man fired from his job? Because the company was beginning to lose sales which then resulted in job cuts.

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Why did the dinosaur cross the road? It didn't.

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What did one saggy boob say to the other one? Better perk up or they'll think we're nuts.

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LO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOPLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOO O O O O O O OLO LOL OL O LO LO LO L OL Wasted your time didn't I -All the lol post are by me, LOL GUY.

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Why should you never attempt to rob Chuck Norris? Because he will beat you up as he knows self defense.

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Know what im sayin'? No but im wearing pants

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How do you write an anti-joke? With the keyboard Or voice recognition software

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What did one dog say to the other? Nothing silly...dogs can't talk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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