- Anti Joke

a dog ate my homework but then he returned it on the lawn

Whats worst than finding a worm in your apple? Going to antijoke.com instead of anti-joke.com

I got put through anger management when I was a child it made me mad.

Did you hear about the three black guys who got run over by a car? No? Neither did Ray Charles!

Why did the man die? He helped others before placing his own oxygen mask on?

Q: why did the dad drop his baby? A: she was slippery.

Sidney Crosby walks into a bar. Except its a metal bar like a pole so he gets another concussion.

A man walks into a bar. He says "ow."

Menstrual jokes aren't funny. Period. Neither are 9/11 jokes. Just plane wrong Same with cripple jokes. Can't stand them I don't see why Helen Keller jokes are funny

Ask me what my favorite color is. What's you favorite color? Blue.

Why was Jimmy sad? Because he has a frog stapled to his forehead

Why did the polar bear cross the road? He didn't, there are no roads in Antarctica.

There once was a man from Nantucket. He decided to sail to Portland. He cast off and was never seen again.

How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Some wild chickens have regular seasonal migration patterns that might require them to cross a road while traveling south. Wild chicken movements include those made in response to changes in food availability, habitat or weather.

You walk into a plane full of Arabs talking about how much they hate America. You arrive at your destination enlightened about the problems in American society.

What happened to the girl who got an abortion? She got an infection.

You just made me realize something friend, and for that I am grateful, I quit and left the remains of what could have been put together again, I mean if the chance was there, I betrayed both you and myself by leaving a sinking ship. I keep telling myself that our dream has no chance of becoming real in a world where people lack what we consider vision, individuality. Now I realize that by losing faith in humanity accepting their individuality and becoming an author of fiction, I have indeed lost my own belief in a greater world, this of course being reflected upon the fact that I write fiction, rather than speeches and well, what I once considered wisdom. Its just that its lonely at the top, the wiser you become, the more alienated you become from the rest, and if others no longer grasp our concepts of wisdom, strength honor, love and such.. Then I suppose that we just end up lonely, as aliens in a world full of monkeys, until I have begun questioning myself if I am just an arrogant prick, and taken that for an answer. Then it does not matter if you have one follower or a million... ...The sensation of solitude, becomes overwhelming, I guess I have been looking around the world for a definition, rather than following my own heart. Listen, I wont pretend to be you, but I will gladly join you, but if you cannot accept us as equals, I decline. Hey on the brighter side, I always got a "man that likes men" vibe out of you, I suppose I got myself a fan huh? Someone trying to copycat me. Damn, I feel broken, or maybe I just realized how broken I have allowed myself to become, lets say you are not really a woman and where using this in order to break me. Then I gotta say you got me there, and I am not proud of that, I guess that you trying, where I gave up, makes you the better one regardless.

Why did Jimmy never like old people? Because he was abused as a child by one.

Haiku's aren't real poems. No body understands them. My soul is burned toast.

Knock knock. Who's there? Ryan. Ryan who? Ryan Seacrest.

The man walked into the church and stayed there.

Why couldn't Jimmy's bedroom door close? Because it had a tree blocking it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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