What's the difference between an airplane and a cantaloupe? What? Wow your a dumby head.

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Why shouldn't you tell a joke during an earthquake. Cause it is not the time nor the place to tell a joke

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Why was Billy's grandma not around for Thanksgiving? Because she's dead

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Stephen Hawking is so paranoid, always looking over his shoulder.

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Did you know Helen Keller had a tree house? Niether did she

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How much does a polar bear weigh? It depends, but most weigh around 775 to 1,200 pounds.

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Old Mother Hubbard Went to the cupboard, To give the poor dog a bone: When she came there, The cupboard was bare, And so the poor dog had none. So Old Mother Hubbard was reported for animal cruelty

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Why are Asians yellow? Because that is their natural skin color

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Why did the man walk instead of taking the bus? Because he felt like getting a heathy workout.

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why did the kid fall off his bike he had a serious illness which made it difficult for him to play sports

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What's black, white, and red all over? A lot of things, you just gotta keep your eyes peeled.

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Wanna hear a joke? Me neither.

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How do you know if a woman is cheating on you? If you catch her cheating on you

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What do you call a bathtub full of dead babies? A tragedy.

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"What's black when clean, but white when dirty?" "A blackboard."

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How is an elephant like a grape? They're both purple, except for the elephant.

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Q: What's worse than ten babies stapled to one tree? A: One baby stapled to ten trees.

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A 10 year old underpriveledged boy goes to the second mile camp and meets his new counselor: Penn State defensive coordinator Jerry Sandusky. The two bond very much and talk a lot. Sandusky invites the boy back to the locker room to shower because the boy got muddy. The boy takes a shower, gets clean, and goes back to his cabin. The boy has a great time at the camp and goes home.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had very recentley made his escape from a nearby farm, of which was owned by a man close to dying of a Rhabdoid Tumor. His family was in mourn.

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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What's the difference between an Asian bookkeeper and a Jewish dog? This isn't a joke, it's an assignment for school, I need to write a 3 page paper on this. Any ideas?

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What did the doctor say to his wife? We have grown apart over the years, I want a divorce.

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What did the bartender say to the three-legged Irishman? What can I get you?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? We will never know because he got hit by a car.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops