A devout Islamic man walks into a weapons of mass destruction store he is shocked and appalled at how easily such dangerous weapons can be bought.

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I like my coffee like I like my slaves... Free

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a black guy walks into a store and is caught stealing things the police are called they get there and hes calmly escorted to the police car

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knock knock who is there who who who your an owl

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What did the librarian say to the rude man who was talking very loudly? The librarian said "shhh keep it down."

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Roses are red... Violets are blue... I have Alzheimers... CHEESE ON TOAST

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What did the black kid say to the white kid My parents are slaves

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Knock knock. Who's there? Blanket Blanket who? Blanket, son of deceased recording artist Michael Jackson. Ever since his father died there has been so much stress in the family that he could not handle it. He ran away and is now seeking shelter and grief council.

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i once bought a timeshare, guess what happened? i'm broke

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Why did the Mexican mow the lawn? The grass was getting to high and needed to be trimmed.

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Yo mamas so fat she hates her life and the example she sets for her children.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Although I guess there is probably no way to get on the swing with no arms unless there was another person there to aid you in the process, and that is highly unlikely because nobody wants to hang out with a girl with no arms. Still even if Suzie was helped on to the swing she wouldn't be able to swing because of her lack of arms. Maybe that person who helped her on pushed the swing with her on it bearing in mind she has no arms. In that case Suzie should stop hanging out with that person because they are very sadistic to deliberately shove a girl with no arms off a swing.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? A lot.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has Stevie Wonder.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Pizzas were meant to be put in an oven.

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Roses are red, Metal is gray, Justin Beiber, is very gay

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What do mermaids wear? Nothing. Mermaids don't exist

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How did the little boy fall over? He was tripped up by his alcoholic father.

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What do Jay Williams, Lebron James, Candace Parker and Maya Moore have in common? They were all winners of the Morgan Wootten Player of the Year Award.

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what has balls and is long and suckible? Spaghetti

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Did you hear about the Nun in the Twin Towers? Yeah, she died too

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What's red, black, and green all over? This is! I only wish you could see it too - the website wont let me upload a picture - but it is pretty impressive! Oh well.

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what's blue and looks like a shirt? a blue shirt

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Im taking a shit right now.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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