Why couldn't the chicken cross the road? It had no legs.

A blond, brunet, and redhead were stranded on an island. With in a week they all died of starvation.

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A woman was in the kitchen making a sandwich for her husband. Shortly after she brings the sandwich to him and he thanks her seeing as his disabled legs prevent him from walking to the kitchen and making one himself. His wife later heads to her job as a firefighter.

There was once a man who lived in a box.

A traveling salesman stops at a farmer's house. The farmer then offers the salesman a bed with his daughter. The salesman quickly replied, "I don't want to go to bed right now. I need to know the way to Pawtucket." The farmer then gave the salesman directions and the two parted ways.

What do we call the science of classifying living things? Racism

Whats worse than the holocaust A: not much

What do you get when you throw a bagel at a chicken? One less bagel.

How do you know when everybody on a plane crash is dead ? When your the only one who walked out

Whats red and smells like black paint Red paint

Why was the man picking his nose? Because he was born without one, and found one he liked.

Why is a bird when it flies? Because the higher it goes the much.

how do you call someone? use a phone

What did the Firefighter say to his crew when they put out the fire.... - Let's go home.

What is long, hard, cries a lot, and can't fall down a man-hole? A baby with a javelin through its neck.

If you want to make the little things count, teach midgets maths!

How can you get a handicap black man to walk again? You don't...... Unless you motivate him with fried chicken. Anti-anti-joke!

I was lying in bed looking at the stars in the sky What did i think to myself? Were the heck is the ceiling???

whats red and brown and goes about 30mph? a squirrel in a blender.

Why was the wife laying on the ground crying? Because she wasn't in the kitchen making a sandwich for her husband

Want to hear a funny story? So, these to kids have cancer...

how many dicks can you fit into mia khalifa's ass

Why does it get hot after a basketball game? Because of the crowd all breathing out carbon dioxide and the high level of activity generating excess body heat.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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