Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

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Why did Dracula cross the road? To get to the other unbitten virgin.

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"This is what kind of fail class?" "AN EPIC FAIL!"

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A Polish immigrant goes to the Department of Motor Vehicles to apply for a driver’s license. He has to take an eye test. They show him a card with the letters C Z W I X N O S T A C Z. “Can you read this?” the optician asks. “Read it?” the Polish guy replies, “No, sir. Allow me to put on my glasses."

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Robert Palmer: Doctor Doctor give me the news! Doctor: You have contracted lung cancer and AIDS. You will die before Christmas.

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Q: What is the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferrari? A: I don't have a ferari in my garage.

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yo momma so fat... she went on a calorie controlled diet and lost 3 stone, she's a really nice lady too.

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Dear Jim, I have a problem with my Hymen... "Jim'll fix it for you..."

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Patient: Doctor, do I have cancer? Doctor: Yes. Patient: Will I live? Doctor: No. Patient: So what do I do? Doctor: SUCK IT UP!!!

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whats awesome? a blade of grass with a mexican hat and a revolver.

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What happened to the little girl who fell into the lake? She was rescued and made a complete recovery.

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Why was the cat meowing really loud? It was on fire. Why did the cat suddenly stop meowing? It died.

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A naked man walks into a bar and is promptly arrested for indecent exposure.

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I told a priest that I would never believe in anything greater than myself. He said I had the God complex, that I was grandios. I stared him in the eye and asked, "how highly do you think of me? Thank you" and left.

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Why did the plane crash into the mountain? The Pilot was a tomato

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Whats the difference........ Between a duck?

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How do you tell if a politician is lying? You make him take a polygraph test.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because his monthly car bill is too freaking high and can't afford to take car to work, where all of his co- workers are waiting to tease him!

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Why can't Julius Caesar use a cell phone? Because he is dead.

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Hellen Kellers dad put a plunger in the toiler and left it there. Hellen Keller went to use the bathroom and.. moved the plunger so she could take a shit.

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Two guys walked into a pub... and they totally redecorated it! It was brilliant.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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why did the jockey lose the horse race? he mistook his horse for Sara Jessica Parker

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2 mentally, unstable , woman visit the cinema , and watched "The Sweeney,"they really enjoyed it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops