Q: What do you call a pair of dead babies lying on the ground? A: Slippers

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Q: What did the hooker say to the priest? A: That was a wonderful sermon. I look forward to next Sunday's church service.

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what do you do when you see a black man punching a girl? act like you dont see it and get the hell out of harms way

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What did the black guy do in the hood? walked down the street, bought the paper and watched Letterman.

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What did the Nazi say to the Jew? Hello.

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A blonde walks into an electronics store. She asks an assistant, "Can I buy that TV"? He says, "Sure, no problem." She then walks out of the store, happy with the purchase that she made.

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Hellen Kellers dad put a plunger in the toiler and left it there. Hellen Keller went to use the bathroom and.. moved the plunger so she could take a shit.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It had a heart attack. Why did the baby fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the monkey

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one day a boy asked a Manican if it had a pulse it didn't

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Q: Why did the Asian man get fired from his job? A: He sexually assaulted his co-workers

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Why didn't the boomerang return? It hit a baby

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Q: What do you call a Jew in space? A: An astronaut you racist bastard!

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Mom now that I am fourteen can I get a bra now? No Harold!

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roses are red violets are blue i killed your family

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Nero, I am happy to hear from you again, but it kinda sounds like you are going to get yourself killed or something. Is there something else I can do? If that asshole is suffering, kill him after he is done doing it, I am done with that piece of shit. Honestly, what is going on Nero? You are not going to suicide or something are you? Please respond, right away, or I wont call your wife.

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why is justin bieber so pale? Because he hasn't come out of the closet.

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Why did the girl fall off of the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

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What do you get when you reverse Zelda's Lullaby ? Skyward Sword's theme.

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Knock Knock Whos there 9/11 nine eleven who? You said you would never forget...

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whats worse than finding out there's mold in your bread? finding out the holocaust is in your bread

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What's worse than hitting your thumb with a hammer? Getting your spine ripped off

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What brown and squishy? um um um um melted kit-kats

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how do you make a plummer cry? you spell PLUMBER wrong

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Your mom is so ugly- Wait, hold on. How are you born?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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