how do you wake up lady gaga? you throw her on the ground.

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You are as dumb as a dumb looking person.

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What do you call a guy that just shit himself? Me

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being raped by a giant scorpion.

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Why did the woman come out of the kitchen? She didn't.

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how do u wake kesha up? Answer:set her alarm clock to a reasonable time

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Why did the Egyptian woman not manage to work the washing machine? The instructions were in English.

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- How do you save a black man from drowning? - I don't know - Good!

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What happened to the girl who got an infection from an abortion? She died.

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There is a bunch of penguins and they fall of a cliff

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homosexual rights to marriage

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Jack: Hey, you know what sucks? Jill: Vacuums Jack: Hey, you know what sucks in a metaphorical sense? Jill: Black holes Jack: Hey, you know what just isn't cool? Jill: Lava?

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What's the hardest part about watching a 2 year old get hit by a bus is? Trying not to laugh.

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What did the sheriff call the death of a black man who was shot 14 times? -The worst case of suicide he'd ever seen.

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Why did the black man across the road? just kidding he didnt make it across the road i hit him with my car

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How do you kill a Chinese hobo Shoot him

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Why did the skeleton not get invited to the party? because he was dead

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why did the baby fall down the steps? Because there was big earth quake that blocked his parents on the other side of the house, therefor leaving no one capable of getting to him befor falling

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How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

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A pony goes to the doctor saying his throat hurts, the doctor sais "oh I know, your a little hoarse". The pony replies, no I'm not ass-hole I have strep throat.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Not only did 7 have that intimidating look to him, but 6 had recently found out that he was a well known mob boss who also went by the name of Lucky Seven. he was in charge of a gang called The Prime Numbers. They had been terrorizing 6's city for sometime now, whether it was stealing, mugging, or even killing or vandalism. 6 sure had a lot to fear, but he knew things might turn out well, as 6 had a great ability to try his best and do what he believed in: Justice

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A 14 year girl enjoys exploring the sexual regions of her body, whilst having one of her intimate sessions her brother walks into her room. Her brother was a rather sexual 17 year old, who has had sex with several different girls, and is not afraid to try new things. the brother says " get a room to his sister... oh wait" and walks out

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What did the farmer say when his cow got stuck in a tree? Nothing, it didn't get stuck in the first place because cows are incapable of climbing trees.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being hit by a plane.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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