What did the Chicken say to the Interviewer Interviewer: how do you feel about your eggs chicken: the eggs are actually my periods. Interviewer: how do you feel about your periods ChicKen: you eat my periods everyday. people make cakes, omlettes and all these food out of my period. Imagine the world running on your period. Interviewer: what are your feelings on your periods Chicken: I have a mixture of feelings. i feel really scared because the farmers would kill me if i can have my periods. i feel glorified because the world runs on my eggs and i feel proud. I feel freaked out because the world actualy runs on my periods

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In Soviet Russia, there was a movement to be renamed into the Russian Federation, which passed on December 25, 1991.

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A horse walks into a Bakery and asks "Do you have any wheat bread?", and the Baker replies "No, we only have white bread." So the horse says: "Thats okay, I rode my bike today."

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Q: What's the difference between Catholism and Judiasm? A: There are many substantial and vital distinctions between Judaism and Christianity. Of course, there are many similarities as well, primarily because Christianity emerged from Judaism. However, the emergence was not a direct line. Christianity broke from Judaism, forming a new religion, so it is misleading, however comfortable the thought might be, to believe that the two religions are essentially the same, or to see Christianity as the natural continuation of Judaism.

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roses are red. violetss are black. a knife would go good in your back

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what do a toothbrush and an ice maker have in common? ....They're both in your house.

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What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians

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Two girls are in a car together. The one in the drivers seat is texting while driving. The girl in the passengers seat notices this and tells her the she should put it away in case of a risk of a collision. She apologizes and puts it away and the two of them drive to the store unharmed and continued their normal day.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they

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How does an elephant climb a cliff who cares

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How do you get a Mexican's attention? "Excuse me, may I have your attention?"

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Why does Magic Johnson have to use extra-large condoms? Because he's got a giant dick and HIV.

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? An X-box, a sweater and some socks.

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What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my Tractor?"

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Why did the bear turn red? Because I fucking stabbed it!

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What did Timmothy get when he got back from his vacation in a tropical destination? Malaria.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Listen, it's a free country.

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What's worst then a road kill? Multiple road kils.

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Why did the man steal the little girl? He didn't. She was his daughter and they were driving home after picking up the groceries.

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Did you hear about the guy with no legs? He had them blown off by a tank shell in Afganistan.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't.

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Knock knock Who's there? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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It was Jimmy's 18th bday so his parents let him have the house to himself. He ate shrooms, fucked his turtle, then had his dick bitten off.

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What did Timmy's mom think of his art project? Nothing, she screamed and called an ambulance because she saw that he had tripped and fallin onto a pair of scissors and they just so happened to peirce his heart.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops