Jack be nimble, Jack be quick, Jack has a crippling addiction to Cocaine which ultimately led to his divorce and the subsequent loss of custody of his children.

Three Jews walked into a bar. I lied... it was a gas chamber.

What's black and white and red all over? A newspaper. No. A nun with a terrible nosebleed. Nobody ever reads the whole newspaper.

What did the bad boy get for Christmas? Incurable cancer.

like most people my age. im 27

Roses are black Violets are black I'm blind

What do you call a midget driving a train? A conductor

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

A clown attends a childs birthday party. He molests 4 children and kills the others. Then leaves.

Why do black people like Black Friday? They can get fairly expensive appliances for a very reasonable price.

Why did the kids put pirahnas in Mr. Hermann's fish tank? So they could eat him.

What's funnier than a pile of dead babies? A pile of dead babies with a live one crawling out.

What sound does a dead cat make? Nothing, it's dead.

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?! No one... pineapples float.

What is the difference between an anti-joke and a joke? The word anti before anti-joke.

Why do the man leave his tv on? He was murdered while he was watching tv

Is this the Krusty Krab? Nope, Chuck Testa.

Why was the boy scared? Well, his mother had recently taken up Satanical ideals and in an attempt to sacrifice themselves to the Dark Lord, she drove her car off a cliff and into a lake. Now, with his dead mother in the drivers seat, no way to call emergency services, and 300 feet of water between him and the surface, you can see why he'd be scared.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had two penises.

A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says "Why the long face?" And the horse says "I have cancer".

What's the best part about the school burning down? All the children trapped inside never had to grow up

Why did the chicken cross the road? Being a chicken, it had no concept of roads or their dangers and was simply trying to find some feed.

2 muffins were in the oven when one turned to the other and said. "Damn it's hot in here" The second muffin looked at him with a shocked expression and exclaims "She's burning the potatoes!"

why did the hobo want cancer so badly? he really needed a haircut

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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