So this drunk guy pokes this girl. 4 months later she has a misscarrage

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Why shouldn't you hit a black guy on a bike? Because you would get charged with vehicular manslaughter and have the NAACP all up in your ass.

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What did modern scientists say to Einstein? Neurtinos travel faster than the speed of light! :)

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? X box Kinect

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What did the woman say when she ate crabs. This smells like my vagina (This women died slowly from crabs)

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What's the difference between my dog and my wife? I respect my dog.

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If your mom is a teacher and your dad is a gynecologist, how many pancakes does it take to stack on top of a dog house roof? 12. Because footballs don't have feathers.

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What did the french toast say to the french fry? I don't know, I don't speak french.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, My vagina is Red, Im on my period.

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito is a common insect in the family Culicidae. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapien, a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans

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Well Here Goes Nothing And nothing happened

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Q: What did the giraffe say to the sunflower? A: I like your shoelaces!

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What did the little boy say to Micheal Jackson? Shouldn't you be dead?

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What happens when a monkey eats banana. It throws them up and gets some blueberry pie.

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Two muffins were sitting in an oven. One says "Holy cow it's hot in here!" The other one says "Wow, I'm a muffin and I can TALK!"

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A duck walks into a grocery store. He looks at the shopkeeper, who then grabs a broom and shoos him back outdoors.

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Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but smell this towel, you won't remember a thing.

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychological disorder.

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My Japanese girlfriend dumped me today...Oh well, theres plenty more in the sea

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What did the man with candy say to the little boy? I have Candy.

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what is black and white and read all over? A penguin in a blender

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How do you get 50 Babies into a phone booth? A blender How do you get them out? Doritos

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Why was the boy put on his socks? So he wouldn't get blisters.

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What's the difference between Jews and pizza? One is an adherent to the religion of Judaism, and the other is a doughy bread topped with tomato sauce and cheese. They share virtually no similarities.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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