Q. What do you call a man with a shovel in his head? A. An ambulance due to the fact that he has a rather serious head wound.

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What did the fat kid eat for dinner? Salad, he's on a diet.

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do you know what Noah didn't bring on his arc? unicorns

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What did Osama Bin Laden Say to Obama when they met? Nothing Osama is Dead

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Two cats are sat on a window ledge. One cat looks to the other and says "Meoww".

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Why did the man drive a van? So he could keep the stuff he stole.

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A man takes a bite into a tuna casserole and burns his tounge. He is also a hermaphradite.

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Why did the Chicken become a medium? To talk to the other side.

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Why didn't the lttle boy fasten his seatbelt? It doesn't matter, it's too late now.

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Your mother is so fat, when she stepped on a scale, it read quite a large number. She resolved to live healthier and exercise more.

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What is worse than getting shot in the leg? Getting shot in the head.

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What does AIDS smell like? AIDS has no smell. AIDS is a diease contracted though sexual contact with another being with the diease. It greatly increases the risk of infections and malignancy. Although AIDS has no smell, in the final stages large sores develope on the surface of the skin. This means you are going to die. Thus, HIV/AIDS has no smell.

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Did you hear about the man who played the lottery? He lost.

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What did Sally want for Christmas? Nothing, she is Jewish.

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Why did the girl fall off of the swings? Because I threw a refrigerator at her.

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What's sadder than a lost puppy? A dead puppy.

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How do you call a guy that ran over 10 children A bad driver

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Guy 1: "Smells like UpDog in here." Guy 2: "No it doesnt.."

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Bill: ask me if i am three ducks in a man suit Jim: are you three ducks in a man suit? Bill: yes

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Ok so im on antijoke.com and they tell me i can write my own joke... so i did.

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Knock knock? Who's there? Interupting Doctor? Interupting Doc... You have cancer

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What did the old man say after he fell down? nothing.

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What's funny about Magic Johnson's T-Cell count? Nothing. He has AIDS, and it's a degenerative disease, that will eventually result in death. There's nothing funny about that.

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Q: How do you make a plumber sad A: you kill his family lolololololololololol

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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