What can a Giraffe have, that no other animal on Earth can? A baby Giraffe.

a jewish person sees a nickel on a sidewalk and continues walking.

Where can you find a tetraplegic? Where you left him.

a cow walked into a bar and asked for a large whiskey on the rocks, 'long day, eh' said the barman, 'yes' replied the cow, 'first a large moving obstical was cutting down my food, and then my friend was raped from his milk.'

A lot eh?

Why was the man arrested? He assaulted and raped an elderly woman at the local Walmart. He then proceeded to hijack the poor woman's Scooter and lead police on a 4 mile long car chase.

Yo momma so ugly she looks out the window and got arrested for mooning.

A fish walked into a bar. Actually it didn't, since fish can't walk.

why did the kid fall off his bike he had a serious illness which made it difficult for him to play sports

how many jews can you fit in a car? 2 in the front and 3 in the back depending on how many people decide to go

whats awesome? a blade of grass with a mexican hat and a revolver.

How do you keep children off your lawn? Touch them.

What's black and blue and hates sex? The unfortunate child in a pedophile's basement who the police have yet to find.

Damn, I was gonna do my laundry but Amanda Todd drank all my bleach

Twelve billion Nero, you puppy dog you hot blooded latino man. Why cant I control it myself?

Do you know how to save a drowning laywer? Approach with caution as drowing victims can panic, thus pushing you under. If possible throw a floatation device rather than go in yourself, or hold out a stick and instruct them to grab one end while you pull them in with the other. If necessary perform CPR. Call an ambulance and monitor for hypothermia.

why did the person cross the road? to catch the chicken

Why did the boy lose his change? He had no Pants Why did the boy have no pants? The Holocaust

Whats the difference between obama and Michael Jackson? Michael Jackson Is dead

Q: What do you call a Jew in space? A: An astronaut you racist bastard!

roses are red violets are blue i killed your family

Mom now that I am fourteen can I get a bra now? No Harold!

Nero, I am happy to hear from you again, but it kinda sounds like you are going to get yourself killed or something. Is there something else I can do? If that asshole is suffering, kill him after he is done doing it, I am done with that piece of shit. Honestly, what is going on Nero? You are not going to suicide or something are you? Please respond, right away, or I wont call your wife.

Why did the girl fall off of the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...