whats black and white and black and white and black and white? a penguin rolling down a hill whats black and white and laughing? the penguin that pushed him

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Lady: I think you guys would be very happy here. Chandler: No no no no no no! No, we're not together. We're not a couple, definitely not a couple! Joey: You seem pretty insulted by that. What? I'm not good enough for you? Chandler: We're not going to have this conversation AGAIN!

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ok, so a blue flower in a meadow dances valiantly, while being watched by a chipmunk. the king of the sky fairies ate an apple and a chicken and a pear, and a cumkwuat and frog legs and a bone and a library and a jeep and fig and a rhino and a sword but fairies don't have that big of mouths to eat all of that, so this never happened

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A man walks up to his boss and asks "Do you want to hear a funny joke?". His boss replied,"Yes". Before the man could finish his joke, his boss had a heart attack and died instantly. The next day, when he's in his car with his wife, he asks "You want to hear a joke?", the wife replied "Sure,". before the man could finish his joke, a car hit them and the wife died but the man happened to survive. The next day, he sat on a bench mourning, his friend walked up to him and asked, "Why are you sad?". the man answered, "Every time I try and tell a joke someone dies!", his friend said, "That's not true, just tell me the joke." "Ok" "Two Pigeons walk into a-". Before he can finish his joke his friends is kidnapped and killed. Sadly, the man walks to a ledge, jumps off and commits suicide. The End

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, this is stupid, Violets are purple Violets are purple Oranges are orange Nothin' rhymes with orange wait.... DOORHINGE!!!!! -sincerely, That famous Orange on YouTube

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Bible Games aka Bible Buffet: SEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEGAAAAAAAAAAAAA! Sometime after the death and return of Superma... Jesus. God: RAISE FROM YOUR GRAVE! Jesus slays holy white beasts: POWER UP! POWER UP! HOMO UP! Uh did he say homo u... ARGH! CANNOT CONTAIN LEVEL OF HOMO! TURNING FURFAG/ALTERED BEAST. A wild Saten appears!: WELCOME TO YOUR DOOM! Jesus used gay wolf punch, it was not very effective... wild Saten uses OMFG HE TEARS OFF HIS OWN HEAD AND THROWS IT AT JESUS! Its super effective! Jesus Dies. Moral: Second coming? He came back to meet his disciples and crap AFTER quoting "ill be back", did he promise some third coming? Is that why people have been waiting for over 2000 years? :P

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A duck walked up to a lemonade stand. The owner of the stand marveled at how close such an adorable duck was to him and proceeded to sell lemonade undisturbed.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

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Why couldn't Suzie put on her boots? Because she got her legs amputated.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why not?

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What's big, black, and just knocked an 8 year old girl off of her bike? The refrigerator I just threw at her. (not all are white you know)

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What do you call two black people in the same sleeping bag? A newly married couple on their camping adventure honeymoon.

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why was the child crying? because his friend just got hit by a van.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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What did Tarzan shout when he saw the elephants coming? "Here come the elephants!"

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What did the bullet say to Bin-Laden? Suck it

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There's this Priest, a Rabbi and a Preacher talking about how similar they are.

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What's the time when black men take over? Poor past never.

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Why did Jerry Sandusky rape little boys? Because his penis was hard and he needed to get his nut off quick

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What's big with fat all over it? Your mom on this dick

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way do Japan bomb pearl harbor because America hat sex with China [watch Hetalia]

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You know whats funny about 9/11? Nothing.

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What do a blonde and a door knob have in common? Everybody gets a turn

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"DUDE! THERE IS A KNIFE IN YOUR LEG!" "SERIOUSLY!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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