i get knocked down, but i don't get up again. my leg is broken and therefore makes it extremely difficult for me to stand up on my own.

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What do Selena and Justin, Kate and William, and Barack and Michelle all have in common? Nothing.

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Wanna hear the most repeated joke on anti jokes? Why did [insert name here] fall off the swing? Because he/she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not [insert name here].

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Knock knock. Who's there? The bailiffs, we have come to take your house

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Why did James drop his ice-cream? He was mourning the loss of his mother to terminal illness so he threw himself in front of a train.

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What do you say to a woman with two black eyes? Nothing, you've already taken her police statement and she doesn't want to discuss the incidentit anymore until her lawyer arrives.

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What's sad about this man who committed suicide? He forgot to return his rented DVDs.

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Don't you just hate it when somebody is saying something interesting and they don't finish their sentence?

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What do you call a girl with one leg? Eileen

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Why did the dog chase the cat. Cause he was fking hungry

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What's fat, round and bounces on the ground? A ball. I lied about the fat bit.

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What do you call a black guy doing community service? Someone who wanted to give back. Stop being racist.

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The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft.

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-What do you say to a woman with Two Black eyes?. -Are you really that dumb to leave the kitchen twice -Elder High School

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What do you call a lump on your penis? STD

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What is your name? My name is Jeff

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If the shoe fits....... its probably your size.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was running away from KFC.

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What's purple and has four legs? I don't know. What? I DONT KNOW EITHER THAT'S WHY I'M ASKING YOU IN THE FIRST PLACE!

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

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An African-American is like a hammer. It can't be trusted in the hands of women.

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Windows are likes prostitutes. You can have two in the front and two in the back!

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Why do birds suddenly appear? Because they can fly

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What's worse then having gum stuck on the bottom of your shoe? Having a stick poked in your eye. What's worse then having a stick poked in your eye? Having a nail go through your foot. What's worse then having a nail go through your foot? Having a stick poked in your eye and a nail going through your foot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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