Roses are Red Violets are Blue If you think this is gonna rhyme, You're dead wrong.

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Why did the blonde fail her science test? Because she spent all day at the hair salon getting her hair died from brown to blonde when she should have spent the time productively studying.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She technically could have, she was physically able, but cars were not invented yet, and even if they were it is unethical for any humane person to let a blind and def person drive.

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Why did little jimmy fall of his bike? His grandma threw the refrigarator at him.

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A Mexican guy, a black guy, and an ISIS member walk into a bar. The black and Mexican men, realizing the potential danger in the situation quickly exit the bar and alert the proper authorities. $

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Why was darren too late for school today...? She got hit by the bus

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What's the difference between an apple and a banana? One's an apple.

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Q: What did the Mexican say to the other Mexican? A: To get to the other side.

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what do u call a black guy who sells drugs a pharmacist

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A Polish immigrant goes to the Department of Motor Vehicles to apply for a driver’s license. He has to take an eye test. They show him a card with the letters C Z W I X N O S T A C Z. “Can you read this?” the optician asks. “Read it?” the Polish guy replies, “No, sir. Allow me to put on my glasses."

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There once was a mam from Peru He dreamed he was eating a shoe It wasn't... It was a goat

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How does Lady Gaga like her meat? As a dress.

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A cat walks into a bar. She belongs to the owner, so he gives her a saucer of milk.

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Timmy's mom is an alcoholic. His dog is asleep in the backyard. Timmy asks his mother, "Why is our dog sleeping?" His mother replies, "It's not sleeping, its dead."

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Watch me whip, watch me nae nae

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What happens if you don't stop, drop, and roll? Astigmatism.

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what happened to the girl next door ? she was brutally murdered.

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What did the mexican say when two houses fell on him? Nothing. He was dead.

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Jake: Why did Sarah fall off the swing? Steve: She had no Arms. Jake: Knock Knock Steve: Who is there? Jake: Not Sarah

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Whats Brown, Long and is on every black man? Legs

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What did Kane Larkin get on his birthday? Cancer...

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jasper walks into a bar, he sees an elephant and can't believe his eyes. he says "HORGWARSH!"

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What's worse than 50 dead babies stapled to trees? 47 dead babies stapled to trees (it's better if it's a nice, round number.)

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what did the duck say to the monkey.............. QUACK!!!!!!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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