Why did Sally sell seashells by the seashore? Because she has no arms and couldn't find a job.

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Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? No? Well he graduated in four years with a degree in chemical engineering. He worked hard all four years in order to keep his scholarship to the university. Now he leads a very successful life and lives in a large house with his wife and two children.

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What? I didn't say anything. Yes you did.

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Wanna hear a joke? Womens rights ;) Wanna hear another joke? Too bad i'm not gonna tell you

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im trying to thing of a good joke...oh wait i got one but only one... ok ready?...oh wait...i forgot it again

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What happened when the old man fell off the roof? He died....

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga in the morning You poke her face

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Why cant the white man dunk? Because he lost his legs in a horrible car accident

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I recently found out I have aids just kiddin heres the real joke... I recenly found out that Philidelphia means "City of Brotherly Love" and I said so do people in philly say its always free hug day in Phillipd fun house in philly?

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There was a golfer at the field where people usually golf. he had a golf club. so did the man next to him. The man i spoke of first hit the guy that was next to him with a golf club. Why? because he was angry at the man for shoving socks down his daughters throat and extracted her eyes with a melon scooper. This should not be humorous, the girl got blood and eye juice on her fathers new shoes when she came home.

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Why didn't Jimmy do well at school? Because he was recently in a car accident, which severely damaged his brain, making it difficult for him to learn things, because of his severely damaged brain, which he got in a car accident, which he was recently involved in.

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I was taking a major shiit in the bathroom stalls at the college and someone walked in on me, talk about awkward

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What does a cookie and the twin towers have in common? They both crumble.

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That awkward moment when your brother goes to crack his neck, but he dies instead.

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Who smokes a lot of weed and speaks 5 different languages? Rosetta Stoner.

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What did the foreigners do to pass time? They blew up the twin towers.

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What do you call an overly-sexual, chewbacca-like creature that smokes cocaine and shoots heroin, while beating its offspring? Mom.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive a train? Because she's blind.

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Why did the bakery run out of the business? They weren't making enough dough

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What is green and fuzzy and can kill you when it falls out of a tree A pooltable

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Whats orange at the bottom of the swimming pool? A baby without floaties.

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How do you find a jew amoung italians? Through a dollar and see which one whines its not enough!

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What do Tutankhamun and Elvis Presley have in common? They're dead

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a boy jumps off a building why? because he's afraid of heights

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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