How do you starve a black man? You deny his foodstamps ~Katie&Lena&Shelbey(:

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What's the difference between your momma and a bucket of shit? Well, for starters your mother and a bucket of shit aren't even made of the same physical structure, and secondly, your mother is sentient while a bucket is not.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I chucked a shit and flushed the toilet.

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A man asks his friend "what's black, blue, and red all over?" He repiles, "Nothing, because I'm colorblind."

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so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

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Why did the guy fall asleep? Because he's in a coma.

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What is the crunchiest part of a Vegetable? It depends if by Vegetable you mean the food or the disabled human incapable of carrying out simple, daily tasks, in which case this joke would be referring to canibalism.

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What was the last thing that went through the crashing helicopter pilot's head? The propeller.

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hey whats your name Im gonna hit you so hard........ that im gonna knock your block off

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Why did the airplane crash? The pilot had a stroke.

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josh roberts makes nuns hang themselves

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what did the robber say to lady gaga to get her in the car?get in the car or i shoot you i just want your money!!

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How many cops does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, they just beat the night since its black

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Why was the fat guy so sad? Because he knew he would die sooner or later, just like every other human being

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Why couldn't the Joker browse the internet? He was using Compuserve.

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Q: Why do all Asians have small penises? A: They don't.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She was a woman

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Wow! I've seen this joke before!

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What did the kI'd with cancer get for Christmas? A coffin.

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why was smokey bear sad? he got cancer from smokeing

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Roses are read, Violets are blue, I have aids, now so do you

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A jew, a mexican, a priest, a polock, a rabbi, a black guy, a white guy, an alien, a rooster, a duck, a horse, a chicken, a carrot, a chinaman, a plumber, a blond, and a christian are all examples of descriptive nouns.

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Which is heavier, a tonne of feathers or a tonne of lead? It doesn't matter when your loved ones are being torn apart by bears.

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How do you scare a lawyer? Threaten to kill his family.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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