Whats worse than failing an English test? finding out your now exgirlfriend has aids.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue; In Soviet Russia, POEM WRITES YOU!

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Why couldn't the man make it to work? Because as he was leaving his apartment, he saw a gruesome murder on the street that was part of an ever-growing and evolving genocide. Quickly following this, he broke down into psychological turmoil and wandered aimlessly through the streets until he eventually reached a forest, where he was taken in by a wild boar and raised to believe in boar-gods. The man died peacefully while planting potatoes.

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So an irishmen, jewish, and asain walk into the bar...and the bartender said get out..

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

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Joseph Coney could die... or worse... he could do anything but that....

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Why was a black man in a police car? He is a police officer.

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If life gives you lemons, You throw them as hard as you can at the nearest stranger. If life gives you melons, You're probably dyslexic.

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Why was Helen Keller's leg yellow? Because her dog was blind too.

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What did the Jew say to the black guy? Hey whatsup?

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2 bald men are standing on an oval, one turns to the other and says "leukemia."

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Your mama is so fat, we are all severely concerned for her health

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Dries Roelvink walks into a bar...

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It's raining, its pouring, the old man is snoring. He bumps his head, and is quickly rushed to the ER for serious head trauma

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A man walks into a bar and orders a water. He then drinks his water and leaves. The following day he returns to the bar and again orders a water. He repeats this for many days until finally one day the bartender asks him why he comes every day to just drink water. The man replies, "Water is free. I got laid off from my job last week. Rough economy, you know." The bartender starts charging him for water, and the man becomes homeless.

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What is small, black and has 18 legs? A centipede with 82 legs cut off.

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Ask me if i'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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What do you call a man with bananas in his ears? A doctor. He is clearly mentally unstable, and probably in pain.

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What do you get when you stab a six year old with a pair of scissors and a machete? A very angry, potentially murderous mother out for revenge.

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Why did Suzie fall of the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Suzie.

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I see London, I see France. Wow! This high-speed train that travels across Europe is amazing!

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Why did Timmy drop his ice cream cone? Because a skyscraper landed on him. Yes. A skyscraper.

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What's nappy,brown,intoxicated,and stealing my bike? A Blazed, black guy that stole my bike.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from the axe murderer. Did it work? No.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops