I'm a blonde... rejected from Kaplan.

A bar walked into a bar. Bars can't walk.

Whats worse than stubbing your toe? Getting shot.

What does a blond do when she stops at a red light? She gets arrested.

How did the cat get outside? It fell out the window

What did the poor boy get for Christmas? Orphaned.

Why did the woman throw a stick of butter out her window? She was mentally unstable.

What's the difference between toilet paper and a shower curtain? So YOU'RE the one!

who can be more evil than the person who hit my nuts. Adolf Hitler.

Obama One Big Ass Mistake America

#If you go down in the woods today, your sure of a big surprise #If you go down in the woods today, you better go in disguise. # I don't know why, I started typing this out and realized I couldn't actually come up with a suitable concluding line.

give a man a blow job and he'll come for a second. teach a man to blow job and .... no that just doesn't work

Why did little Sammy die of boredom? The WNBA was on

Why wasnt the black man entitled to a social welfare cheque? Because he made quite good money at a nearby hospital, where he worked as a doctor

Why doesn't a ducks quack echo? Actually, it does, but the echo is imperceptible to human ears.

Why did simran go over to maliyah and emma and andrea and alice and amanda and Every other fat ugly chicks house? Cause he cant fu*k anybody else!!!!!

Hey there, I like bananas! No you don't.

What did the cannibal eat for Christmas. Your Mom!

How do you find the population of Mexico? Send out a census

What do you get when you cross a moose with a crépe? A moose with a crépe up his nose. -ilikecrepes97

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, It's none of my business.

Why was the little girl crying? Because she was hanging upside down from an oak tree.

what's the difference between a virginia, and steve keen? a virginia is,nt a knob

What do you call Metta World Peace after he has hit somebody? Metta World War.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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