Confucius says, I hear and I forget. I see and I remember. I do and I understand.

What do you call a bear with no teeth? A Gummy Bear!!

Why do Jews have such big noses? They don't; To suggest phenotypic variation along religious lines is preposterous.

What's blue, white and red all over? Not a duck.

Everytime someone says Jamie on this website, he's referring to Dylan, cause he's to insecure to write jokes about anyone else. Please direct all jokes at Dylan Hodge, 14 years of age, living in Queensland, Australia, come to his house to watch the f a g man, suck his mothers p e n i s.

What did the magician's assistant say after the magician cut her in half?... Nothing. Her spine was severed and she died instantly.

what's better than being stabbed in the testicles with a biro? the Silversun Pickup's album Neck of the Woods

This is an anti-joke. It is not funny because "anti" means the opposite of something.

why barack obama sad he realized the 4 trillion dollars of debt wasn't going be solved by borrowing more money

why did the man turn on and off the lights 20 times because he was diagnosed with O.C.D as a child

Why'd the asian man cross the road? I dont know, who cares? Just leave the guy alone

Knock knock Whos there? Sorry, wrong house,goodbye!

When SCUBA diving, why is it important to fall backward off the side of the boat? Because if you fell forward, you would still be in the boat.

What's blue? The sky.

A man walks in to a bar with a frog stapled to his head. The bar tender says What the heck is that. The frog says I don't know this thing has been coming out of my but for two days

'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? Robin, get in the car.

Flowers are colors Love me

What's worse than a dead baby? A dumpster full of dead babies What's worse than that? One is still alive at the bottom What's worse than that? It had to eat its way out. What's worse than that? It came back for seconds

THIS ONE TIME MY DOG ATE A WHOLE CHEESECAKE

Black people are like jelly beans. Nobody likes the black one's.

What does Santa give to a naughty child who wants coal for Christmas? Nothing, Santa doesn't exist.

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? AIDS

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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