What did the woman say to the dog? Stop shitting on my carpet your dickhole

Why did the man jump off the cliff? Because he suffered from chronic depression as a result of frequent drug abuse.

Why is the sky blue during day? Because it would be night if it was black.

Who smokes a lot of weed and speaks 5 different languages? Rosetta Stoner.

What did the foreigners do to pass time? They blew up the twin towers.

why was the girl eating a pie , because she were hungry

Q: What's green and has four wheels? A: A green car.

A man got struck by a car and was rushed to hospital on life support, he died shortly after. His wife was informed of his death by the doctors and shortly after she killed her children and finally hung herself.

So a clown walks up to you and asks, "What'll always STICK with you? The violent disposition of humanity."

That awkward moment when your brother goes to crack his neck, but he dies instead.

How to smash an apple Iphone <<<<<< Use A Hammer >>>>>>> PS : if u want to break a hammer use an iphone

How do you creep out a clown? Pet him softly and call him kitty kat while making a guttural sound that is not socially acceptable in mainstream American society.

- Knock knock - Who's there - James - James who ? - James Redwood.

yo mother is so fat, the recursive function computing her mass causes a stack overflow.

You know you're a redneck when you come from a rural area and behave as such.

What did little John do when he was bored? He went on Anti-Joke

Why was the boy in front of the adoption center sad? He lost his lolly-pop.

Read a Book.

How do you wake up Lady Gaga in the morning You poke her face

Q:why is walmart so big? A:Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of Walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

How do you beat a black in sports. "shot him when the game starts"

A duck walks into a bar and orders 2 beers and a shot. The bartender says "That'll be four fifty." The duck says he doesn't have any money and asks if the bartender can put it on his bill. The bartender says "No." He then picked the duck up by the neck and raped him mercilessly. "That's what he gets" one patron said. "Yeah, he was asking for it"

a blind man walks into a wall

How do you get an elephant into a freezer? You stuff him in there!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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