So there were these two ovens in a muffin. One oven said "Holy fuck it's muffiny in here." The other oven said "Holy fuck a talking oven!"

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Two muffins are in an oven. After a set period of time, they finish baking and are enjoyed by the family who had made them. Two weeks later the eldest daughter contracts syphilis thanks to numerous sexual partners. She soon dies leaving her parents and brother depressed. Her brother is kidnapped by a viscous child predator and the mother commits suicide. The father gets a job with the New York Yankees. He is eaten by a genetically modified zebra.

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sadf

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Your mother is of a healthy weight and a pleasure to be around.

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What's the difference between a bird and a wheel? They both fly, I lied about the wheel.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he frickin wanted to!!!!!!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side... (other side as in the afterlife, for it committed suicide by crossing the road)

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Q:why is steven balmont gonna beat up mr fatty goral A:because hes a fat czech Shout out to my mandem lewis hall&moses

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Why did a blond killed herself? She couldnt find a corner in a round room.

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Q. Why do cheetahs run so fast? A. Because their bodies allow them to.

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Two monkeys are sitting in a tree. One monkey looks to the other monkey and says, "I bet I can jump from this tree to the next tree without falling." The other monkey replies, "I'm sure you could. You're a monkey."

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Friends are a lot like trees I just thought you should know.

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A man walked into a bar. It was closed, so I don't see how this was possible.

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What do you call a chicken with no head? A chicken with no head.

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What more fun than a barrel full of monkeys? A barrel of dead babies

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How big does your mouth have to be to eat a baby? How would i know, i'm not a canible.

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God Nero, Marry me now! I removed the nose thingie but it wont stop.

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How do you call the uncle who molested you as a child? More than likely with a telephone.

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Why couldn't Horton hear a who? He was a loaf of bread.

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Why was Jimi's mom sad? Because Jimi suddenly fell to the floor clenching his neck while saying "I'm Dying!"

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Why did Johnny fall off his bike? His father never taught him how to ride one as he was an abusive alcoholic who abandoned Johnny's mother when Johnny was 3, so he is not very good at riding bikes.

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What's worse than having a FUPA? The Holocaust

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what did Cinderella say when she got to the ball? "Grggglgluglguggarglegerrrllggglge"

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why did the guy cross the road? Because he felt like it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops