What did the black boy get for Christmas? A bike his parents bought him.

What is green and smells like paint? Grass, it doesnt smell like paint, I lied.

I walk in to a bar, ask for a beer, get drunk, walk away and.... hmmm.. how could I finish the joke??..

I insist, you go ahead. See you around. how about in four six hours?

When is a Jewish persons bedtime? When the brain releases endorphins, causing drowsiness, which usually leads one to sleep.

Whats better than 32 dead babies stapled to 1 tree? - 1 dead baby stapled to 32 trees

What did the black man buy at the store? Nothing he has no money

What do a chicken and a grape have in comon? - They're both purple, except for the chicken.

Two peanuts were walking down the street, one was assaulted, the other was brutally raped.

what do chinese kids make for fathers day? shoes

Why aren't fish good at telling jokes? Their neural structure isn't capable of processing languages or creating a method of communicating with humans, thus they both do not know any jokes since they are incapable of understanding the concept of humour.

A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

What time is it Mr.Wolf? About half 5. Alright, thanks mate. How's the kids? Managing. Yeah. Yeah. Crazy world. Anyway, Got to be going. Yeah yeah. Say hi to the wife for me. Will do. Alright, Bye. See you later.

John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt has a really long name.

A man and wife were having a vacation when suddenly the man falls to the floor and starts having a seizure. The woman screams "Oh my God, is there a doctor in the house?!" Then a doctor appears and helps the man with the appropriate method of handling a seizure. The doctor says everything is going to be okay.

Is Barack Obama a dentist, a teacher, or the president of the United States? A dentist. He just happens to have the same name as the president.

Your mama is so fat, we are all severely concerned for her health

how do you stop a black man from drowning take your foot off his head

Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme But this one doesnt

Yo mamas so poor, she should probably find a source of consistent payment to support herself.

There were three men walking across the road and it started to rain

Why was the little boy bald? Because he had leukaemia

Why do gingers get mad when people call them gingers? Because it hurts their feelings

the other day i was walking down the street and saw a black man carrying a tv. i thought to myself, "hey that looks like mine!" but then i was like nawwwwwww, mine's at home...... shining my shoes -_-

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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