What's yellow and smells like cheese? Cheese.

Q: how do you get an clown off a unicycle A:You hit it with a police baton

Q. How many blondes does it take to put in a lightbulb? A. Cause of 7,8,9!

A man is eating in a restaurant and says, "Waiter! There's a fly in my soup!" The waiter says, "I'm sorry, can I bring you some salad instead?"

What did the smoker say when he coughed? Ohhh dam it's turned into a smokers cough

What's the difference between an orange and a banana? they're spelled differently

How do you make a miner sad? You cut his d*ck off then feed it to his family.

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? Names.

Whats funnier than 24. ... DEEZ NUTS.

Most adults can swim. Current government studies are investigating similar skills in babies. With unnecessarily large pools.

why couldnt the african child eat enough food? he didnt have a mouth.

What did the little boy say to Micheal Jackson? Shouldn't you be dead?

Why couldn't the blond dial 911? She lost her arms in a tragic car accident last year

How did the corpse cross the road? They can't cross the road they're dead.

What do you call a black hitch hiker: stranded

What do you call a fish with no eye? Blind.

Why is 6 afraid of 7 because 7 is a escaped mental patient that thinks 6 betrayed him

roses are red violets are blue i smell meth abkfjbekfhbkfsdshjfbkhb

A man goes up to an old friend and says: "Help me, I just found out that my friend is gay! What should I do!?" The other man replies: "If there is no problem, I cannot help you... Yet, there is one. Your homophobia. I suggest that you see a therapist immediately and I hope that you can get over the fact of the contemplation of a sexuality."

Have you heard that Bert & Ernie from Sesame Street are gay? If so, than whoever told you may be mentally challenged, Bert & Ernie are both puppets which even though they resemble people with active personalities, they remain puppets and do not have a sexual oreintation.

Why did a kid throw a clock out the window? Because he was adopted

What's blue and thrashes about on the floor? A baby playing in a plastic bag. How do you make a man pregnant? Stick a dead baby up his ass! How do you stop a baby falling down a manhole? Stick a javelin through it's head. How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends how hard you throw them. -S

Why don't you hit a black guy riding a bike? Because that is dangerous and he could get hurt.

Why did the girl run over the road? Her buttons rolled to the other side! (From a book called... Al-capone does my shirts) (Natilie)

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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