What do you call a bunch of black people at the bottom of the ocean? Cocoa puffs

Billy and Joseph are playing Rock paper scissors. Billy says paper. Joseph proceeds to throw a rock as hard as he can at Billys face and sends him to the emergency room where he was later diagnosed with terminal testicular cancer.

How does Fred drink his milk? -computer

Why don't some black men have jobs? Because they won't work

Knock Knock ...Does anybody know how to use a goddamn door bell these days?

Is this the Krusty Krab? Yes...? No, you're still Patrick!

Why did the chicken cross the road? How am I supposed to know?

What do you do with a wombat? Allow it to freely express instinctive behaviour in its natural habitat.

God Nero, Marry me now! I removed the nose thingie but it wont stop.

XD I TOTALLY CANT BELIEVE I FELL FOR THAT ONE! XD IT WAS LIKE SO OBVIOUS! XD

A: What do you call a female bombing the white house? Q: A terrorist

Its Eliza, hope you are still there, would you mind getting here sooner? This site is not safe, besides its cold here, I mean send somebody else if you got to, I might look frail but Nero taught me a thing or two, so I can honestly say that Nero taught me better than you guys just in case. Funny you say there is no code, yet add three, yeah you better expect nothing "fancy", Mr.Torture dungeon master. Honestly though I do not blame you, and if I really meant you where a psycho, I would not have agreed/asked you showed up, I am serious I need to get out of here.

Well, its allright then, just tired that is all, leave it be, I mean what if your wife sees it? What will she think?

What's an AntiJoke? A joke that has no comical value.

You in love with me? Like platonic? Fine, we will move operations elsewhere, you really got to tell me who you are working for someday.

A woman walked into a bar. She dragged her drunk husband off his stool and left.

If bananas are purple, then what color are oranges? I am not going to tell you the answer because this joke has no significance whatsoever.

sadf

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into an orange and finding a worm.

Why couldn't Horton hear a who? He was a loaf of bread.

A homophobic man walks into a bar and the bartender asks: "what can I get for ya?" the man replies: "shut up gaylord"

So there were these two ovens in a muffin. One oven said "Holy fuck it's muffiny in here." The other oven said "Holy fuck a talking oven!"

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

How do you make a hormone? Modify bacteria using recombinant DNA technology.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...