There are two cows in a field. One cow says to the other - 'Are you afraid of the mad cow disease?' The other cow says - 'No, cuz I'm a duck.'

whats white and black, and red all over, kiren poping jacob cherry

What do you do if you see a Mexican riding a bike? Say "Hello." It is polite.

How did bill lose his legs he got them amputated after contracting a severe case of "INeedToGetMyLegsAmputatedSyndrome"

The kid was riding a honda xr70r. He got hit by a non moving object and died.

Why was Blue looking for her clue. She was drugged by a stranger and ended up inside of Mailbox.

Why did Dracula cross the road? To get to the other unbitten virgin.

Why did John not like his chocolate? It wasn't chocolate it was poop.

hey babe, are you made of copper, tellerium, tungsten and iridium? because i like people made of copper, tellerium, tungsten and iridium.

Dwarf Shortage

1. The name of your street 2. The name of your pet 3. Your favorite activity 4. The color of your eyes 5. The number of shoes you own Now fill in the blank with the corresponding number to your answers. "One day I was ___3___ my dog when a pornstar named __(1)__ ___(2)___ asked me how many times I can ___(3)____ myself. I said ___(5)___ times and the juice that came out of me was __(4)___."

A man walks into a library and asks to borrow a book on suicide The librarian gives him permission and he leaves the library with the book in hand.

Why was Sally sad? She was the only survivor of a plane crash that killed her entire family.

How do you poop without it splashing? clench clench, release, clench clench, release, clench, release, clench, release.

Why couldn't the driver start his car? Because the driver was a tree

What did peter griffin say to the black guy? Oh you are black.

Pickup line: Hey babe, do you work at Mcdonalds? Because I don't have a job, are you hiring?

What do a baby and a slinky have in common? They both bring a smile to your face when you push then down a flight of stairs.

My friends all use twitter but i dont know how to use it, so i said i will carry a megaphone around saying what i am doing at random times. Like yesterday i was in the library so i said into my megaphone "i am in the library" Yay i got 3 new followers, 2 of them were cops. Jokes From Blox Computers Corporation [Thailand] Bellow Joke In Thai: ?????? Twitter ???????????????? ??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? ? ???????????????????????????? ???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? "i am ??????????" ??????????????? 3, 2 ????????????????????

What did the cat say to the rabbit? Nothing, cats are incapable of human speech as far as scientists are concerned. Also, the mouse was having a bad day. Rutabaga.

Hey you know what? What? Never mind.

Why did they bury the fireman at the side of the hill? Because he was dead

Roses are nice, violets are fine, ill be the 6, if you be the 9!

In other news, a Florida man was arrested today for stealing candy...with a knife.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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