A boy asks his teacher for a eraser....he was given a blue pen. Turns out he was in space.

So theres a Black guy, White guy and Mexican guy all sitting at a bar. They were friends.

1/= |_| (4|\| /234|) 7|-|15 (411 */0|_|/2531/= 4 1337 |-|4><0/2!!!1!

What do you get when you cross a rooster with a cocker spaniel? Nothing, because roosters and Dog's don't mix.

I've got a fever, and the only prescription is more ibuprofen...

What's black and white all over and has a mouth? A Zebra

What do you call a fat man that breaks into your house at 2 a.m. and steals your money and your television? Probably a dumbass, a jackass, a moron, an idiot, or something in that general area.

In a joke book: So a man walks into a bar. Suddenlly the universe around the author crack. Unable to sustain the infinite potential of punchlines, the author tumbles through an empty void amongst shards of his broken reality.

Q: Why was the Asian teacher fired from her job? A: Because she always showed to school too late and to make matters worse the school had recently found out that she was a raging alcoholic.

The last head of Satan, is oh but what you blamed upon Your faults, Your sins. The thoughts of Madness written here, yet potent enough to cloud Your thoughts.... Wait not forever children of man, as eternity is at its peak, the false prophet IS AMONGST US! But what side is he on? The last ditch attempt to protect humanity from a raging jealous vengeful God? Say it is not so! Say that darkness is not the only thing standing against you and eternal damnation... ...Yet you killed his only true child, you stole his name, his essence... Even his Identity... ...Even the Angels white are powerless to stop him, Your maker, Your true maker, for what is the grief of the holy, from which you took his only son... ...As you celebrate once and once anew... :...Merry CHRISTmas, to all of those of you all now left behind... Celebrate it well, as before the world reaches 2017, is where it all ends...

96 right now there mad at each other but pretty soon it will look like this 69

Why did the pot-head have red eyes? He got soap in them.

What do you call a guy with out any arms or legs floating in the ocean? Bob

A Norwegian, a Swede and a Dane where having a bet on who could swim the furthest without getting wet on their hair. The Swede could have done better... The Dane did surprisingly well. The Norwegian, being bald, was disqualified. Moral: I still have some hair left!

What's green and has wheels? Nope, it's a car.

Why did Li Chong get an A on his math test? He studied.

What do you get when you cross a road with a car? Severe injuries or even death.

What's worse than getting murdered? Getting murdered twice? - Louis

you know whats funny?! nine eleven!

I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

why was six afraid of seven? it wasn't. numbers dont have feelings.

Knock Knock Who's there? Santa Santa who? Imwatching you!

If life give you lemons, throw them at people.

What did the banana say to the apple? We're fruity.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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