Ha ha. You've wasted your life, sucker!

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A cripple and a Jew walk into a bar. They sit down and begin to discuss all the stigmas that they have faced their entire lives. The conversation goes on for an hour, at which point a black man walks in. Just then, the bar explodes and they all die.

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Today I wanted to make world peace.... So I killed everyone.

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what did the penguin say to the other penguin after they rolled down a hill, and fell into a pile of leaves then proceeded to go swimming, play basketball, go swimming again and then play ping pong and pool? nothing. penguins cant talk

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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Why can't Hellen Keller have kids? Because she's dead, therefore does not possess the ability to bear children.

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Why did the woman make the man a sandwich? Because the man severed his spinal cord and is no longer able to move any of his limbs.

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roses are red, violets are are blue, I have five fingers, the middle one is for you

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Roses are blue Violets are red It's fascinating what genetic engineering can do

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a man was beating his wife his wife asks him to stop he says no and continues beating her

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He got hit in the head with a brick.

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Q: Why did the child fall? A: Because I shot him in the leg.

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What did god say to Jesus. "Dude, she's not a virgin"

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What do you do if a goose comes flying towards you? Duck.

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What do a chicken and a grape have in comon? - They're both purple, except for the chicken.

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you will like this because i am black.

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Whats better than throwing a baby off a building? Catching it with a pitchfork.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue if something smells bad, its gotta be you! Roses are red this much is true but violets are purple not f***ing blue!

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Why did Hitler kill himself? He realized what he'd gotten himself into and became severely depressed

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Do you know what would happen if Hitler was still alive today. Nothing he's not.

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Whats the difference between a Ferrari and an erection? I dont have a Ferrari!!

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A man walks in to a bar, and the Bartender says "Why the long face?" The man replies "My wife is dying of Terminal Cancer".

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They say that there's more than one way to skin a cat...so far iv only found the one.

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What do you call a black man in church? Religious

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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