Ian: Your Mama's so dumb, she tried to commit suicide off a sidewalk. Dan: Yea, and when that didn't work she hanged herself.

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A black, Kenyan man enters a race. He comes in second to last as he didn't practice as much as the other contestants.

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What did the man give his wife for her anniversary? Nothing. The man is a raging alcoholic and forget her anniversary due to his high alcoholic intake during the past few weeks. Even if he did remember he most likely didn't care after seeing his wife cheat on him with another woman putting his marriage into shambles.

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What looks good hanging from trees? Spanish moss.

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When life hands you lemons you can't make lemonade, Sugar and Water are two other key ingredients that were not included with the lemons.

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Q: What is the difference between a jew and a pizza? A: The pizza does not scream in the oven.

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so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

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What did the caterpillar say to the robot? Nothing. Caterpillars do not have vocal chords and there are not, as yet, any truly portable robots capable of comprehending speech so to speak to one would be pointless.

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Whats worse than the Holacaust? Stepping on damn Lego's. MrBounty44

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rarw

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A man walks into a bar. He bumps his head on the iron and has headaches for a week.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, Or so the tell me, Because I'm Blind

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"I just don't understand the difference between yours and mines." "Well, you see, yours belong to you, whereas mines explode when you step on them."

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Why were 5 tall white guys sitting on a bench? They were in the NBA

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Q: How many Jewish people can fit in a four door sedan? A: 4, or possibly 5, depending on the sedan's optional seating, and depending on whether the gentleman are comfortable enough with each other to scoot closer to allow a 5th friend to join in.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side. wow i missed the entire purpose of this.

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How are leprechauns and lions similar? The both start with L.

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What do you call a cat with 1 eye, 4 legs, and its tongue out? Road kill.

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Burp

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whats the easiest way to kill a baby? let it live a long and meaningful life, prolonging the inevitable death of old age.

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These jokes don't have punchlines.

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Q: What is brown and sticky and often found in the grass? A: A stick.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile.

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A Irish leaves and bump in to a really tall the Irish sorry boss

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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