What's worse than burning your tongue drinking hot chocolate? Being shanked by a homeless man.

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what do you call a old guy who touches children? my dad

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www.xnxx.com

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roses are red violets are blue I have a knife stand by the door

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Stephen hawking walks into a bar.

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Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, But the very next day, I died.

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What is the difference between a Mexican and an a pile of crap? One is disgusting and unsanitary and the other is a pile of crap.

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whats worse than getting eaten by a bear a bear getting eaten by a squirrel who ate you too.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I'm a fish out of water. Help me I'm suffocating.

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What do you call a group of Mexicans jumping over a fence? I heat of runners trying out for the Mexican Olympic hurdle team.

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Two men and a woman go to lunch together at a restaurant in New York City. The first man says, "I'm glad that we're finally doing this." The second man says, "Yeah, me too." The woman concurs.

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I cried because I had no shoes until I met a man with no feet... ...then I made fun of him and laughed.

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Roses are red, Violates are blue. I have an erection, and its lasted more then three hours

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a man walks into the doctors office and says DOCTOR!, DOCTOR! IT HURTS TO BEND MY LEG!!! the doctor replies then dont bend your leg and the mans great pain eventually heals

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Knock Knock. Who's There? Nobody, this is a metaphorical door..

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the ocean? Bob

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What did the horse say to it's owner? It didn't horses can't talk

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Is it not a antijoke? When your granpa uncle or whatever used to pull out basically worthless coins out of your ears? And each time you wanted for him to drag out so many you can actually buy some bubblegum or something, the "stash" you where saving diminishes the moment you receive a new coin? Moral: Dont believe in yourself! Believe in me! Because I believe in you!

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Your uncle jack just helped you off a horse. Now it's your turn to help your uncle jack off a horse.

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How do you get Jake snow to shut up? Say shut up

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was died...

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how do you make kindergarteners unhappy? you taze them.

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knock knock who's there ... '*Opens the door slowly* SUPRISE BUTT SEX!

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THIS ONE TIME MY DOG ATE A WHOLE CHEESECAKE

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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