How do you fit 10 babies in a bowl? With a blender. How do you get them out of the bowl? You don't, you've already been arrested for multiple cases of infanticide.

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One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. The fight began and the challenger says, "Hey whats the one thing you say when you don't want to fight anymore and you let the other person win?" The other guy says to the challanger, "I give up?" Then the challenger yells. "I WIN!"

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Q: If you are debating whether to smoke marijuana, consider: what will your mother say when she finds your corpse? A: As a relatively harmless and non-addictive substance, Marijuana was most likely not the cause of my child’s death. It was probably AIDS.

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What's the difference between a jew and a boyscout? Boyscouts came back from camp

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? Were both lawyers.

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"Knock-knock." "Come in, sorry that the doorbell is broken."

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Q: What's worse than being raped by a giant scorpion? Getting raped by 2 giant scorpions, a fridge, some potatoes and a hule bunch of worms.

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Why was the boy laughing at Sally? Because Sally was a man

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Why did Little Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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What did the politician say to the other politician? We are both politicians.

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Killing your friend as a joke.

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What did the man say to the other man? I have a large rod

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Why did Tim fall out of the window? Well... he didn't exactly fall... I pushed him

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What's the difference between a chicken? One leg is both the same

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A blonde was taking a Math exam, so she brought her Asian boyfriend with her. It turns out they were going to his father's retirement party afterwards.

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What's large and blue? Probably quite a few things.

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How do you make a boy cry? Pour soup on his head.

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My house is on fire I'll probably die posting this joke

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Why didnt Stevie Wonder wave back at the white man? Because he's a racist.

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hmm, thinking, thinking, SNAPPLE!

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How do you stop a plane? Land it.

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What's big fat and ugly? A monster

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Q: What's grey and can't climb trees A: A car park

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A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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