Wow! I've seen this joke before!

what do you call a fish with no gills? Dead

a man walks into a bar.... his? drinking problem is seriously affecting his family

Why did the boy fall off the swing?

that green thing is not a leaf, it's my sister

i bought a sock i wore it i bought a fish i killed it i bought a human i ate it IM A CANNIBAL

a priest, a rabbi, and a nun walk into a bar...and the bartender goes...what is this a joke? mr. healey

What do you get when you cross two things that are seemingly unrelated? A play on words.

How do you make a hormone? Modify bacteria using recombinant DNA technology.

Q: A policeman is working past a room. The window is too high to see in. The person hears "no John, don't", and then a gunshot. He rushes inside and sees a dead body on the floor with a gun beside him. Also in the room are a doctor, a lawyer and a priest. Without asking any questions, he immediately arrests the priest. Why? A: Because the priest is the only male in the room.

Why was the black man crying? Becasue his wife and children were killed in a horrific car accident on their way home from church.

Q: What is the difference between a potato chip and a frog? A: Neither one of them is a flower.

Why did the chicken cross the road? AIDs.

How many Norwegians does it take to change a light bulb? Only one. But all the replacements are high-tolerance, long-life and non-dimmable.

How do you call the uncle who molested you as a child? More than likely with a telephone.

What's the time when black men take over? Poor past never.

Dude! That movie was so gay! It had a bunch of naked men having sex with other naked men!

Your mumma's so fat she is fat

Don`t be mean? WOMAN! DO YOU NOT HOW TERRIBLE THE DEMAND YOU MAKE IS? ...Fine alright, I wont leave you hanging then... So I wont call. Moral: "Seriously though, I am leaving too, but I want the top comment"

How are grapes and squirrels similar? They're both purple. Except for the squirrel.

A woman walked into a bar. She dragged her drunk husband off his stool and left.

Did you hear about the three black guys who got run over by a car? No? Neither did Ray Charles!

Q: What is the fastest way to get insulted? A: Go screw yourself m0therf0cker!

Justin Bieber's voice sounds like Michael J. Fox playing a theramin.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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