roses are read violets are blue my fanny is orange I have the flu my name is gemma

thumb_up thumb_down -20

My gifts to my gf included: A diamond ring, a sports car, a house in malibu, a new credit card, a private jet, but most importantly, a Refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What do you call someone who sits on anti joke every day? Luke Skywalker

thumb_up thumb_down -20

what happens when a mexican makes love to an octopus? It makes a freaking weird looking animal

thumb_up thumb_down -20

I was jacking off I don't use my hand tho, I just use my gf's vagiina

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What is the difference between Barack Obama and Mitt Romney? One is President, the other is not.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

God, you know after creating humanity and kinda regretting it and stuff, fell into drinking and betting. He found Sin a fellow poker player, and all was good. Until God, drinking a bit too much bet a bit too many of his creds: Son. Jesus: Yes father. God: Uh, I kinda ended up low on cash on the poker game last night and I kinda well... I am gonna be frank here, I bet you and lost. NeroMetal Not dissing the bible, just enjoying the always brighter side of life eh? ;)

thumb_up thumb_down -22

How do you get your dog to give you a blow job? You have to force him.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Knock Knock! Who's there? Dog Dog wh- wait how did you knock? *mindblown*

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What do you call it when you have sex with a black man? Sex

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why was the young child dead in the middle of the road? His mother wasn't there to prevent him from chasing the ball across the road, and therefore, he ran in front of a truck

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What's tall black and has curly hair? A black guy

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Jesus, Mohammed, and Moses all walk into a bar. They sit down at a table and glare at each other before turning to watch the baseball game. They support opposing teams.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Dude! That movie was so gay! It had a bunch of naked men having sex with other naked men!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

person 1: don't look person 2:Why person 1:because my shirt not on and my boobs are jiggiling

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Q : Who is the most famous celebrity, Lady Gaga or Justin Bieber? A : Neither, because they are just fads.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Whats funny about a guinea pig water skiing? The part where he explodes.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Suicide isn't the answer, it's just the solution. -by Ross

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What's big, white, and kills niiggers? Hurricane sandy

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Q.what is the diffrence between a jew and a pizza A.pizzas dont scream in the oven

thumb_up thumb_down -22

HEYEEYAHEYAYYAEEAHHAAA

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Me - Ask me if I am a Frog. You - Are you a Frog? Me - No.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

why did michele jackson rape a kid. because he was horny duhhhh!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops