Q-What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? A-Where's my tractor?

why didn't the donkey go to the party? Because, unfortunately he did not have the required linguistic skills to communicate with the person inviting. This is obviously dependent on whether the person who invited him was a human, if it was another donkey then perhaps this would of happened. However, this is also very unlikely as donkeys do not have parties or really communicate

why did the child fail to make his bed? because he has downs syndrome and he is incapable of participating in everyday activities.

How many dead babies fit in a car? Ask Casey Anthony, she'll probably know.

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? -Gave her a timeout

If Chuck Norris was really so awesome he would come and slam my head into the keyboard.

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She was a woman

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

Why doesn't a ducks quack echo? Actually, it does, but the echo is imperceptible to human ears.

Knock knock who's threre me, I kill you

What did the plane say to the twin towers on 9/11 - Nothing, how do you expect planes to talk, stop hallucinating and stop with the drugs

If there's something strange in you neighbourhood, who you gonna call? my mate Jonno who has a gun.

Why did the submarine crash? Someone opened the window

What's the difference between a plum and an elephant? They're both purple but the elephant is gray.

What's the difference between Republicans and Democrats? There is a series of boxes which one can choose to check on a ballot, officially registering an individual with a certain party. Available parties include the Green Party, The American Communist Party, The Republican Party, and the Democratic Party among others. Republicans choose to check the Republican box, Democrats choose to check the Democrat box. Also Republicans are closet homosexuals and Democrats are terrorists.

ur mamas so ugly cause when she looked up at the sky it started to rain

why did the kid stop eating his breakfast...two Penn state officials knocked at the door

Why didn't the door open? Because it was locked

Kameron Brown is gay.

My name's Forrest Gump. People call me Forrest Gump.

What starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Popcorn

Why did the little boy die? His mother got an abortion...

What would Abraham Lincoln do if he were alive today? Scream and scratch at the lid of his coffin.

A man died.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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