a horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "why the long face?" and the horse says "my wife has terminal cancer.

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A man walks into the doctor's office for an appointment. The doctor proceeds to perform the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he felt the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies,"You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

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What is green and has wheels? Grass, i was lying about the wheels

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Two muffins are in an oven. One muffin turned to the other and said, "Boy, its getting hot in here." The other muffin said, "WE ARE GOING TO DIE IN HERE AND NO ONE WILL HERE US SCREAM."

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Why doesn't stevie wonder play snooker? Because it's not very popular in the US.

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whats blue and fluffy? BLUE FLUFF

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What's big, grey and can't swim? A castle

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread. Why did the car crash? Because the driver was a loaf of bread. Why did the boat sink? Because the pirates attacked.

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Why did the insect play marco polo? It couldn't. Marco polo requires multiple players.

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There is a car full of black people.

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Popsicles

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a schizophrenic, and so am I.

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What is a terrible tragedy and wears ice skates? Holocaust; The musical on ice

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So what happened after 911?? What do you think?

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How did Hellen Keller's parents torture her? They made her go to bed when she wasn't very sleepy

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STOP LOOKING AT MY JOKE

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Why did Billy fall off the Empire State building? He didn't fall, he jumped. He decided to commit suicide due to his lack of friends, caring parents, low self-esteem, and self-concious issues. Billy really needed a therapist.

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Whats the difference between christians and nazis? one suppressed human rights and caused millions of deaths. the others were responsible for the holocaust.

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Two guys walk into a bar, the third one ducks.

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Hey, want to hear a joke? Women's Rights

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What happend when Chuck Norris did a push up? He did one push up.

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What did Santa get for a young boy? A gun. What did Santa get for the young boys sister? Nothing, the boy shot Santa. Who sent out presents the next Christmas? Not Santa.

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Why did the man fall down the steps? I shot him in the face.

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What has two legs and is red all over? Half a cat.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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