Why is evan a lil poop? cause he pooped my poop all the pooping ;)

Why was the school teacher crying? Because after 12 minutes of watching each one of your students be crushed to death by an 18 wheeler, anyone would cry.

Knock knock! Yes?

What do you not want to get when playing scrabble? Diarrhea

Knock, knock. Who's there? The police. I'm afraid there's been an accident. Your spouse is in hospital.

A black man, a mexican man and a chinese man all walk into a supermarket. Together, they purchase ingredients to make a delicious vegetarian lasagna. That night, they make the lasagna and greatly enjoy it together.

What's better then winning a gold medal at the special olympics? Not being retarded.

What is brown and has 3 legs? My severely injured cat.

Baaaaaaahhhhhh

What did the unintelligent sports jock say to the band geek. Hey.

How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an axe. -Tag

Bob: The whale is a creature that isn't naturally capable of creating any kind of technologically advanced unit of operations? Spectator: Was that actually a question or a statement? Bob: To be candid, occasionally my mind registers the practically indelible impression that I am not competent enough to effectively articulate my relatively subtle thoughts of philosophical value. Spectator: What'd you attempt to explicate? Bob: Hello, contemporary. Spectator: That's definitely considerably better than, "Benevolent greeting to you, fellow indigenous inhabitants of the magnificant, planetary cynosure, Earth Prime." You've managed to improve! Bob: I shall try to emulate those simpletons of this planet in order to garner new allies. Maybe next time I should just stick with some traditional routines that many people currently practice on a daily basis. Now, it's time to examine some "test subjects" so to educate myself further on the nature of my numerous classmates, purported facillitators etc. Spectator: Bye. Bob: See you next time! Wow... I amaze myself with my ability to efficiently adapt to my circumstantial situations. I mean, I am a ninja student who has developed new skills at communication! Wait... nevermind. Bystander: man, were you just soliloquizing... and personally enjoying it? Bob: Ehhh,... No? Bystander: Was that a statement or a question?

Hitler

How do u save someone from dieing of cancer? U shoot them in the head

Why did the chicken cross the road? cause' he was annoyed with all the stereotypcial idiots who insist he crosses the road for comical value

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Living through the Holocaust and finding a time machine to take you back to the beginning of it again.

I you beat Chuck Norris in arm wrestling, you will be proud of yourself and he will go home with nothing.

What's long, hard and full of seamen? A submarine.

Chuck Norris can fly around the world in under 2 days. In an airplane.

Why did lady gaga set her alarm? So she could get up in the morning.

Roses are Red, violets are blue, I have STD, Now so do you. :3

Whats black and white and red all over? An interracial aborted fetus

Why do mexicans jump the gate Because theres a sale at chipotle

What's worse than having a friend in a car accident? Laughing at their funeral.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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