You're an Irish male that walks into a bar full of Mexicans. Upon entering you are approached by two topless women. ....You realize you have been coming to the same sleazy strip club on the edge of town every night after work for the past few years. After seeing that you have gradually become completely bald and neglect your two children and wife, you recognize your extreme depression. Strippers now see you as a consistent, "paying customer" and you proceed seek psychiatric care, while being prescribed anti-depressants. The Mexicans at the bar are hard working, tax-paying citizens that would like to provide an education for their children.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What did the alcoholic do when he finished his beer? Opened another one.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Wanna hear a joke!? Miley Cyrus.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he lost his grip on the branch and was unable to reach another before reaching the ground.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What's brown and wears glasses? A poo with bad eyesight.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because after death the body loses control of muscles and the monkey could no longer grasp the branch with his tail

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What does a baseball and a T-Rex have in common? What? Neither of them is a carrot.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Two parrots are in a cage. The one looks at the other one and says, "answer the phone," and the other one says, "where are my car keys."

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What do you call a man who just died 5 minutes ago? Dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Brett Farve

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did dan jump off of the empire state building? -Because Carl pushed him off.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

where's waldo? in a picture book.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Where must you go if you have the desire to eat somebody's face? A psychiatric ward. You are clearly going insane and must seek help.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What did the Muslim do when he was in a big American crowd? He was socializing.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

- Knock Knock - Whos there? - No one

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What's the best part about seventeen-year-olds? There's seven of them.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What did Jesus say to Moses? Jesus isn't real. Moses replied, "Do you think I'm stupid? I'm talking to him!"

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A catholic priest invited one of Sunday school students to his house one night. They watched a movie and the boy was home before his bedtime.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Knock knock Who's there? Me. Idiot.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

did you ever see a butter fly?

thumb_up thumb_down +13

i went to have a wank over anime as well yesterday, the i realised i dont have a penis. -adam fantuzzi

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Q: what do polo bears have for lunch A: iceburger

thumb_up thumb_down +11

How much does a polar bear weigh?. . .Approximately 515 kilos.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Roses are red Roses are red What is big Cherenets head

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops