What's better then winning a gold medal at the special olympics? Not being retarded.

Yo momma is so dumb she... oh god, i'm so sorry, she was driving and she just looked down at her cellphone and there was a red light and all the cars were coming she didn't even stop oh god i'm so sorry.

knock, knock. use the doorbell next time.

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

dildo

9/11 was a shocking time for all of us.

Three black men go to the basketball courts one day hoping to play some ball. On the way there they see a homeless man with a sign that says "Homeless. Anything will help." However, since they were on there way to play ball, none of them found it necessary to bring cash, thus resulting in them walking by the homeless man without giving him any money.

why was the kid named owen? Because thats what his parents wnted him to be named

What's sweaty, fat, and Italian? Italians

How do u save someone from dieing of cancer? U shoot them in the head

One orphan said to the other, 'what are your parents called'

How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? Just one.

There once was a man from Nantucket Whose name was Mike

A duck walked up to a bad hearing drug dealer, and dealer asked duck, "What you do want?" A duck said, "Quack!" So dealer gave duck a crack

A jew walks into a bar. The bartender says "get out you jew!" The bar tender apparently was a Nazi.

"So, how's life in North Korea?" "Well, I can't complain."

What is wrong with racism? A lot of things.

How do you make a Fireman cry? You kill his family in a fire.

what do you call someone that ran into a wall hurt

A man walks into a bar, orders a few drinks and becomes drunk. the bartender calls a taxi and the man is driven home.

A rat scurries into a bar. Six days later, all of the people in that bar die of bubonic plague.

What was the latino gardener doing? Working hard to keep his job in these tough economic times.

I was walking on the beach when I heard a man yell "Help, Shark, Help!" and I laughed, because I knew the shark wasn't going to help him.

What did the giraffe say to the monkey? Nothing

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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