What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

What do you call two men having sex with Oprah? Group sex.

Why did the guy read anti jokes? because there funny

what's the difference between a babie and a watermelon. one's fun to hit with a hammer. . . ht other ones a watermelon.

Whats black and white, black and white, black and white, black and white, black and white? A Nun falling down stairs

A dyslexic Irishman walks out of a bra.

cheese

How do you tell if your sister is on her period? Cause your dads dick tastes funny...

Adam knocks on the door. Eve: who is it? Adam: Don't be silly, just open the f*cking door.

Why did the jew put a parking meter on his roof.? ....So santa would have to pay to park.

How do you stop a puppy from barking in the front yard? Put him in the backyard.

What's the difference between an Asian driver and a Belgian prostitute? Nothing at all: Marie-Edith Yang is proud of her mixed heritage, and earns a decent wage in a relatively clean brothel in the lovely little medieval town of Bruges.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

American healthcare.

How much does a polar bear weigh?. . .Approximately 515 kilos.

What do you call a black person in a pool? A black person swimming.

A rebellious teenage boy throws a dozen eggs on the street, now he has no eggs.

chuck norris is a little b|tch

Why did Napoleon cross his legs? Because he had to go to the bathroom

What did the dog say when his family's grandmother came back to life from the dead and ate everyone? Nothing. This is a highly improbable situation, and furthermore, dogs cannot speak.

What do you call a dinosaur with no teeth? He's British

What did the convicted child molester say to the little girl? Nothing, they cut his tongue out in prison.

Wife: 'what did I put into the washing machine ?' Husband: laundry

Q: What did the hobo get for Christmas? A: Hypothermia.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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