Why did the kid fail the test? Because he was retarded.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs wearing lead weights in a pool? Screwed.

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does this look unsure to you?

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Why did the cat fall out of the tree? Cause the branch broke. Why did the baby fall out of the tree? Cause it was stapled to the cat.

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Roses are red Violets are red Everything is red If you are dead... Or a potato

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Whose there? A chicken.

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Wanna hear a joke? Womens' rights.

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what is one black person on the moon? Anser: a problem What is all the black peaple on the moon...... a solution.

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An attractive naked woman walks into a bar. Everyone is surprised, and all the straight men, gay women and bi-sexual men and women in the bar are sexually aroused.

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yo mama's so fat, her medical weight chart is much steeper than those of most women her age

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A African man and Hispanic man fall off of a cliff, which hits the ground first? They both hit the ground simultaneously, due to their equal mass and surface area.

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What is Jason? Black.

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Knock, knock. You do realize you can actually physically knock on the door instead of just imitating the sound effect with your mouth, right? It's actually way more effective that way. Just saying, since it's raining outside and you're cold and want to come in...

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Wife: 'what did I put into the washing machine ?' Husband: laundry

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was being chased by a predator and crossing the road led it away from it's pursuer.

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what has wings, bald but doesn't fly? a bald eagle... i lied at the flying part because i'm a f*cking lier from hell watching porn all day with my brother...

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Woman : Child,what time is it? Child : I'm not a kid, I Broccoli.

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why did the football coach go to the bank? to make a deposit into his account

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Why are haikus dumb Because they are just stupid Get it a haiku It is a haiku hashaha

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What did a cat said to another cat? Nothing because cats dont talk.

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When is the right time to have sex with a 16 year old? After consent from her parents

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If you were an octopus what would you? Say "I an octopus".

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What is black blue and screaming? Your daughter when i kicked the shit out of her

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What's sweaty, fat, and Italian? Italians

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops