What's worse than nailing 10 babies to a wall? Ripping them off.

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why didn't the baby cry once it came out of the womb? because it was a stillborn.

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Remember how I made you hypnotically cum by poking your own nose last time? When I told you that hypnotic story about the astrologer and the brain surgeon? So you wet yet? Think about how easy its going to be for me when I take out Mr.Big and slap down your coffee table with it, yeah... Feels cozy down there does it not?

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What do a worm and a human have in common? They both have arms and legs apart from the worm

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how do u stop a cat from peeing on the floor? Kill it... haha

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Why did the girl call suicide hotline? Cuz he wanted to kill herself.

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what is the difference between a pile of dead babies and a cadilac. a cadilac is something i want

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What's red and smells like blue paint? Fetus Blood. Due to the low concentration of iron, it gives it an aroma of paint.

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Let's play twenty questions. Alright, but I have to warn u I have piss running down my leg

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Q: What did the hooker say to the priest? A: That was a wonderful sermon. I look forward to next Sunday's church service.

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Why didn't the jew spend his paycheck? He wanted to save money for the future

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Where was the Decoration Of Independence Signed? At the bottom.

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The rabbit owns a small business and has trouble getting a loan.

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Why did the cow say moo? Cows can't say anything they actually make noises that humans interpreted as "moo"

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anti-joke.ru - russian style

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What's hot and cold at the same time? Hotcold.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because grass don't eat meat.

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whats worse than catching your parents having sex? having sex with your parents

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Why did the girl eat a sandwich? because she was thirsty

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What's sad about 4 black people in a Cadillac going over a cliff? It was my car.

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Why do women have boobs? So you've got something to look at while you talk to them. That's sexist... I'm sorry.

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A: Knock knock B:The door is open.

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Gus's mom

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What's worse than walking into a door by accident? Finding out that your mother molestors children.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops