A duck walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, what can I get you?" He is then checked into the psychiatric ward at the local hospital, for talking to a duck.

A man is driving down the highway. He falls asleep at the wheel due to his case of narcolepsy, and dies in a fiery car crash.

A man walks into a library and asks for a book on suicide. The librarian quickly picks out such a book and hands it to him, because to deny him the book would break the conventions of a library.

what happened to the kid who opened the goldfish? he got eaten by a cixelsyd dinosaur

The Dalai Lama orders a slice of pizza for $2 and gives the cashier a $5 bill. He then realizes he hasn't been given any change, so he asks for his change. The cashier quickly apologizes and hands the Dalai Lama three dollar bills.

Wanna hear the orphan joke knock knock who's there? not you parents

Q-Why did the little boy feel hot? A-Because he faceplanted into a bonfire.

A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

Roses are reds, Viloets are blue, Thank God I'm a christian, And not a jew.

I got stopped for speeding the other day. The policeman said I had to pay a £50 fine. I was gutted. However, later that night I had amazing sex with my wife, which helped me to take my mind off things a bit.

A Palestinian woman asks a man for directions. She is promptly stoned to death.

Knock knock. Who's there? Conscience. Conscience who? Oh, sorry about that Hitler, you wouldn't know who I am.

Kid hands Lebron a dollar, asks for change Lebron hands him back 4 quarters.

how do you get a dog to stop barking? you hit it with a stick.

What do you get if you mix a baby with a blender? A prison sentence.

Harry Potter: Hey voldemort, you wanna go get our noses pierced?? Voldemort: I killed your parents.

In soviet Russia, your dead because it doesn't exist anymore

This is Mr.Bear you all are on rtc for the next week. See me in G7 NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

What did Chuck Testa do when he saw she had died of a heart attack? He cried and gave her a proper funeral and burial.

What' worse than random Holocaust jokes? The Holocaust

Q: How do you keep an idiot in suspense? A:

What did the red bag have written on it? Yellow bag

She Explored My Body, Licked, Sucked, Swallowed! When Satisfied, She Left! . . . . Damn Mosquito!!!

If you place a dog next to a cow, they're not the same size

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...