A man comes home after a long days work. It is late at night and he gets in bed with his wife who is already asleep. Later that night he gets up for a glass of water and returns to the bed room to see that his wife doesn't appear to be breathing and calls 911. He then realizes that this isn't his house and he leaves.

Why was Helen Keller's leg yellow? Because her dog was blind too.

Why cant stevie wonder read? Because he is blind

How did the person die? He got hit by a car.

time to spruce up!

Q: What lives in holes? A: Jerks.

Why did little Timmy fall off his bike? His pace maker failed.

What is white and shaped like a refrigerator? A refrigerator.

Your mama is so fat, we are all severely concerned for her health

What do you call the offspring of a gerbil and a hamster? Whatever you want.

people who spank you sure are a pain in the ass.

A blonde was taking a Math exam, so she brought her Asian boyfriend with her. It turns out they were going to his father's retirement party afterwards.

Sharing means caring, Caring is socialism

What do you call a person with an eye patch, no arms, and a mohawk? A person with an eye patch, no arms, and a mohawk.

What did the man think as the foul baseball flew rapidly toward his face? Oh man, I thought my tickets were to an NBA game.

did you hear about the little girl who won first place in her school's spelling bee? she was hit by a bus

Roses are blue Violets are red It's fascinating what genetic engineering can do

Horse walks into a bar. 'The barman says 'why the long face?' The horse says 'I've got cancer'.

Knock knock Who's there? Overused punchline Overused punchline who? The Holocaust.

What is the definition of a shame (as in "that's a shame")? When a picnic is postponed due to rain, or hired entertainment becomes unavailable at the last minute due to illness, or a book ends badly having started out well.

your momma is so fat she eats a lot of things

A bomb went off in japan where did sally go Everywhere

how much kush does it take to get kushagra high

Why did little Tommy eat an apple? Because he was on a diet

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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