What's Worse Than Falling Over? .......Rape.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Allmighty Genie vs Common douche Genie: I the allmighty Genie am at your command, I can grant you any three WISHES Common douche: Okay! I want to sit on my own lap Genie: Uh...Well...You uh sure you want that? I Uh... Wait a moment please... Wimp wins Genieous victory.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What do you call a fish with no "i's"? A blind fish.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What is black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender!

thumb_up thumb_down -19

How you know when dislextic

thumb_up thumb_down -19

A man jumps of the roof of his building. The superindentant now owns the building and the man who jumped off the building has 59 fractures. Oh and he died.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

A Mayor accidently killed one of the citizens of his town through dangerous driving. He could not be charged with murder, as it was an accident, but there was an uproar, and he was humiliated beyond question and forced out of office straight away. Even his family rejected him, owing to the fact that the unfortunate citizen he struck was his son's girlfriend.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What is worst than a black guy hanging on a tree. A burnt black guy hanging on a tree

thumb_up thumb_down -19

A Jew walks into Macy's

thumb_up thumb_down -19

So let's pretend two men that had been friends for a very long time, one man asks the other man how he is, so the man tells the other man how he is doing. Then that man asks the other man how he is doing. The two men were engaged in a very interesting conversation. What did the men do next? Nothing. We're pretending, remember?

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why does my friend pick up trash? Because he is a garbageman

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What can you tell by a black guy who walks into a bank with a ski mask on? His face was severely disfigured in a horrific accident.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

To Daniel You must have been born on a highway cuz thats where most accidents happen

thumb_up thumb_down -19

A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as that could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Q: Why is daddy wrestling mommy? A: Well Jimmy, that is called sexual intercourse. That is how you were created, and many people of all ages engage in this activity every second.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

the person above me ^ lost his virginity to a howler monkey and the person below me was his gay friend untill he found out about his recent run in with a howler monkey and does not wish the same fait as he does.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

How did the deaf girl die? I beeped but she didnt hear me

thumb_up thumb_down -19

It's not illegal, it's just frowned upon... like... masterbating on an airplane.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Knock Knock? Why did you just say knock knock just ring the doorbell

thumb_up thumb_down -19

if i get 1,000 likes ill kill your hole family

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What's sad about a mexican man dying in a car crash? He had a family that loved and cared for him.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What do you call a black man playing a bass guitar? A bassist.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why are black people so good at basketball? Because they practise.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah's witness Damn...

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops