i like candy and other things that are edible... please dont thumbs down just cuz this suxxx just put thumbs up and santa claus will haunt u :)

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How do you confuse a blond? Nordic mytholigi. That is, if shes american

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A Norwegian, a Swede and a Dane where having a bet on who could swim the furthest without getting wet on their hair. The Swede could have done better... The Dane did surprisingly well. The Norwegian, being bald, was disqualified. Moral: I still have some hair left!

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How did Jimmy lose seven pounds? I killed him.

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Two elephants were in a bathtub. One elephant asks the other "pass the soap?" The other elephant passes him the soap and they continue with their bath.

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How many Dean Mckee's does it take to screw in a lightbulb? He doesn't know what a lightbulb's for, nevermind how to use one.

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Why do Asian men love noodles? Noodles are delicious!

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Why did the blonde fail her drug test? She's actually never did drugs before but since she didn't show up for appointment, that counts as an automatic fail.

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Why couldn't the boy with no arms and no Legs swim? Because he was black.

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An englishman, a scotsman and an irishman walk into a bar together. They sit down at the bar, and the barman says, "What is this, some kind of joke?!"

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How many dead babies can you fit in a child's swimming pool? 9 (Trust me, you won't be able to squeeze the tenth one in there.)

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You want some cake? Sure! Okay, go buy the ingridients and bake me some. YAY!

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Hey i just met you, and this us crazy! Heres some toilet paper, wipe my ass maybe?

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Knock knock Whos there Your Ma Your Ma who Your ma's in jail!!!

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how do you kill a blonde with a pistol Put the clip in and shoot her

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Why did the blonde girl drink lots of water? Because the fat comments got to her and she changed her diet to nothing but water

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I have a really good knock knock joke. You start. Knock knock. Open the door see who it is and then slam the door in your face THE END

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What is black and blue and red all over? My wife.

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Roses are red, You're a failed abortion, Happy Valentines Day. :D

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how could you not hav not died of dehyderation?

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that green thing is not a leaf, it's my sister

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What did the boyfriend ask his girlfriend for on his birthday? Pokemon Yellow version.

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My jeans

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awkward moment when someone pretends to be Mr. Bear and stuffs up his own joke

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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