A dog is always in the pushup position.

Q: What did the giraffe say to the sunflower? A: I like your shoelaces!

What did the coconut say to the lizard? Nothing, the coconut fell off the tree and killed the lizard.

Why do all asians all look alike? Because they do.

How do you make a nerd cry? Give him a 99% on a test.

Why do people make jokes about cancer? Oviously to get thier ass kicked!!! -BY:KOLBY HOOKS

why did the chicken cross the road because it wanted to get hit by a car

why did the man break his arm? he didn't, someone else broke it for him

September 11 was the 9/11 of all terrorist attacks.

All the kids at school we're playing soccer on a sunny day except Jenny, because she had a headache and didn't come to school that day

What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong WALKS on the moon. Michael Jackson rapes little boys

What do you call a woman with two black eyes? Irish sunglasses

I like my wine like I like my women. Not at all.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

A man finds out he was molested by his father as a child.

Why did the man ask the IPhone to marry him He was smoking weed

Roses are red Violets are blue I hate rhyming Penis

What do you get when you cross a moose with a crépe? A moose with a crépe up his nose. -ilikecrepes97

Why did the little boy throw rocks at his sister? ...Because she has cancer.

Knock Knock Who's there? Eat a d!ck you sh!t fukk! I'm going have to ask you leave now

why did the cookie go to the doctor? it had vaginal warts

The awkward moment when you are reading these jokes and either it's not funny or you don't get it...

What do you call Metta World Peace after he has hit somebody? Metta World War.

What happens when you put a baby in the microwave? I don't know, cause I was to busy jerking off.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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