Q: What's the difference between a trampoline and a bag of dead babies? A: I take off my shoes when I jump on a trampoline.

What did a Blond do in the Desert? She got lost after Falling of a flying carpet

Two guys fight over a girl. The girl gets up from under them.

Why did Suzie fall of the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Suzie.

What do black people eat? What everyone else does!

You can pick your friends you can pick your nose but you cant pick your friends nose.

Andoni was here

If Chuck Norris were to be hit by a train he would die

why does the room smell bad? because there's a dead body under the bed

womens rights.

Did you hear the one about the guy who went his whole life without ever telling a joke? He was still funnier than David Letterman.

How do you tell a bunch of Chinese people apart? Go up to each one and ask them their first and last names. The chances of any of them being the same is quite slim, giving each person their own identity.

how many large people can you fit in a bath tub ... 1/16

What's white and would kill you if it fell out of a tree? A refrigerator.

What's 8 foot tall and can't breathe? Ryan Eisenhour

Why did the man kill himself? Because he had a gun

Why was the pizza mad? Because he was going thorough a growth spurt and the testosterone got to him.

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

So, there's a black man, an Asian man and an Irishman who are in a bar, politely discussing wether the Asian's phone would break if it was thrown from a plane in the Pacific Ocean. The black man says "Of course it would break." The Irishman says "I have no opinion on this..." The Asian man says "I think it would break, you are right John." Suddenly, a man enters.

Q. Why did the boy fall off the swing? A. He had no arms or legs. Q. What did he get for Christmas? A. A drumset Q. Knock Knock Who's there Not him

what did the woman say? 'duhhh, i don't have a penis durr durr' (By the way, I'm trying to be not misogynistic, please let me know if you find this misogynistic in any way)

An American, a Mexican, and a black guy all walked into the same bar. Why did the 'BEWARE OF METAL BAR' sign have to be in japanese?!

How many blonds does it take to screw in a light bulb? ... It shouldn't take anymore than one person to do this job, regardless of there hair color.

Why did Hitler kill himself? He realized what he'd gotten himself into and became severely depressed

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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