what was so bad about hitler? he inadvertently subjected his political officials to death by rope

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs? Names.

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What is round and bad-tempered? A vicious circle

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Why was the Mexican in the back of a pick up truck? There were not any available seats.

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Why did the Mexican mow the lawn? Because it was summer and the grass had extensive growth, so much so, that it proceeded to spread to his neighbors yard. His neighbor then called HOA, and thus, the unruly grass was taken care of.

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A horse walks into a bar, the bar tender says" why the long face". The horse, unable to comprehend English just shits on the floor and leaves

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What's worst than finding a worm in your apple Finding half a worm in your apple .....

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A baby crawls into a bar. He cannot walk.

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A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

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how many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop? Not enough

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A black man wearing a belt. Oh, he has a shoelace!

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Why did the man enter the fridge? He was hot Why is the man not in the chicken shop Hes in the fridge

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why did the man commit scuicide because he was depressed

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Three men are stranded, mid-ocean, in a small rowboat. They realize quickly that their imminent demise is slowly creeping into the forefront of their consciousnesses. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. A problem reared it's head as it became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore and, in turn, salvation. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

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That awkwad moment when a homeless man runs naked around a golf cource yelling hears the 19th hole bitches.

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What did the dog do in the phone booth? Nothing, as dog do not have opposable thumbs and cannot grip objects. The previous user must have left the door open and the dog walked in, only to leave a few moments later.

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Im not random you just can't think as fa-bunnies

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I went out back to bury my hoe.. with a hoe..

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why are you going to laugh at this its reallly dumb

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What is the defference between Obama and an American? Obama doesn't have a birth certificate.

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Roses are red, Violates are blue. I have an erection, and its lasted more then three hours

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Knock knock! Who's there? Hitler, time to shower!

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A panda walks into a bar, orders some bamboo shoots, and bamboo leaves, and eats them

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What's worse than the holocaust? Dropping your biscuit in your cup of tea.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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