If i was given a penny every time i hear "It's not my fault". I will have the money equal to the nominal price multiplied by the count of times i heard that phrase.

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Whats long, green and falls out of trees? A canoe. Why did the old man fall out of the tree? He was in the canoe.

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What do you call black people in a pool? African american swimmers

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Why did the aisian man get pulled over? Because he was going over the speed limit .

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why did the chicken cross the road? it didn't it got hit by a bus.

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Q: What's red and bad for your teeth? A: Bricks.

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Whats the difference between a kangaroo and a kangeroot ? Ones a marsupial. The others a Geordie stuck in a lift.

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autistic kids rock

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What does a banana and a helicopter have in common? Neither of them are a police officer.

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What's yellow and smells like cheese? Cheese.

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Roses are nice, violets are fine, ill be the 6, if you be the 9!

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Rose are brown, Violets are brown, Who keeps pooping in my garden?

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why were the niggas in paris? rhetorical question. everyone knows they aren't french

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What did the fat man eat for breakfast? Nothing, he died of heart failure in the night.

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why did the students in 7/8 red try to commit suicide? they had miss harding as a teacher!

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Why did the boy jump off the building? To get to the bottom.

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What did Jay Z say to his long lost friends? Allow me to reintroduce myself, my names Jay - Z

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Why did they bury the fireman at the side of the hill? Because he was dead

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Two black men walk past a white man who recently hung himself from a tree. Oh the racist irony.

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Is this your pen? I wanna go to school, bye!

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Why don't you ever want to greet your friend Jack on the plane? Because your wife cheated on you with him and she is having his baby, if you were to even think about talking to Jack, you'd end up slitting his throat and throwing him off the side of the plane into a crocodile pit where they will make a feast of his body for the next couple days... So just don't greet Jack

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who else is on here?

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A princess kisses a frog to acquire a prince. Then gets arrested for beastiality.

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Once upon a time there lived 3 polar bears; a mummy polar bear, a daddy polar bear and a baby polar bear. Ond day the baby polar bear said to the daddy polar bear "I don't feel like a polar bear, I'm cold!" and the daddy polar bear said "You look like a polar bear."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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