Roses are red, My name is Dave, This joke is pointless, microwave.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Jesus can can WALK on WATER, but Chuck Norris can SWIM in it.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

How do you fit 100 dead babies in a box? A blender. How do you get them out? Tortilla Chips. hehehehehehe

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Q: Why were there four married men in one room without their pants on? A: because it was the mens bathroom.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What was Hellen Keller's favorite color? Velcro.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

I will see it when I believe it, as far as your order or whatever goes, I have already taken a look, and its nothing for me, you hide behind idealism yet use cruel methods and inhuman tactics in order to justify your means, you hide behind a shell of fucking "charm" and employ people to harass others. YOU ARE NO FUCKING BETTER THAN THE REST! YOU ARE BENEATH ME! As for that sister fucking bullshit, joke is on you, I do not have a sister! I bet that was one of your fucking "Nero`s" all six billion of your fucking personality disorders. Moral: I am the FUCKING MORAL MAN! And while I do not have a sister to rape, ill get down with yours.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Which came first? The chicken? Or the egg? Whichever one was more sexually excited i guess.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Yo mama's so fat, she died of a mixture of obesity and type 1 diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it got run over on the way there.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's the best part about having sex with twenty eight year olds? They've reached sexual peak but aren't yet past it. Plus, they still aren't in their 30's.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why can't Dave drive? Because Dave is an orange.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A monk went to a bar. He soon came out because he realized he didn't have cash because he left his wallet in his other robe.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What are crabs with out the crabs Nothing hahahahaha

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Whats worse than getting a splinter? Taking a shower at penn state

thumb_up thumb_down +8

If 2 wrongs make a right and 2 rights make a wrong, then when you have 4 rights=2 wrongs, you have a true statement. If you have 8 rights = 4 wrongs, you have a verified statement.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A man carrying a bucket of golf clubs walks into a bar with a blonde, a brunette, and an asian. His name was Tiger Woods.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What was the black woman doing in the kitchen? She was simply washing her hands after eating dinner.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

what did a poor guys get for christmast ? brain tumor.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Yo mama so fat, when the waiter handed her the menu, she said "yes"

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What is Alqueida's favorite football team? The New York Jets.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

The boy gets shot in the face, he then dies of childhood obesity.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did one cannibal say to the other cannibal? Nothing, because he was eating him.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Ian: Your Mama's so dumb, she tried to commit suicide off a sidewalk. Dan: Yea, and when that didn't work she hanged herself.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why couldn't the little boy see? His eyes were closed.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops