What do you call a fish with no eyes? Dead.

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What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? dead parents.

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what did the red towel and the blue towel say? Nothing because towels are inanimate objects and therefore can't talk.

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What would you do for a kwuandike bar? Anything clean and sanitary that wouldn't provide harm to me or others near me

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Why did the Asian student do well in school? Because he worked hard and studied everyday

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Why did the officer arrest the black man? Because he suspected him of littering. ...and because he was black.

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A man walks into a police station with a gun... He is there to turn it in, he found it on the side of the road and realized that this situation would best be handled by the proper authorities.

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Why did the blonde fail her science test? Because she spent all day at the hair salon getting her hair died from brown to blonde when she should have spent the time productively studying.

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What do you call an armless legless man swimming? Dead

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What is green, has four legs, and if it falls out of a tree and onto your head, it will kill you? A pool table.

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Why did Maggie shit herself? Because she saw her son.

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Did you know Helen Keller had a tree house? Niether did she

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Do not use your phone, I repeat DO NOT USE YOUR PHONE, at this point we do not know enough, as for this kid, he is about two minutes from getting his ass locked in a nice prison, I told them he does not know anything, and I will make sure he does not squeal, you should be good, even if I got to take care of him.

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What did batman say to robin before they got in the car Get in the car

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Why did the man walk instead of taking the bus? Because he felt like getting a heathy workout.

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womens rights

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A guy walks into a Bar ........ OUCH

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Why did the bald man lose his hair no not cancer obviously AIDS.

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What's worse than stapling a baby to a tree? Stapling the same baby to ten trees.

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Q. Why did Lucy fall off the swing? A. She had no arms Q. Why didn't she get back up? A. She had no legs Q. Why did no one help her up? A. She had no friends Q. Why did Lucy fall off the swing A. She had no arms You: knock knock Other person: who's there? You: not Lucy

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knock knock whos there? i dont know arent you supposed to get the door?

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What's the difference between Elmo and Cookie Monster? One of them doesn't listen to Michelle Obama

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Why did women scream loudly!? As the women was unexpectadly frightend!

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NeroChan, I have said nothing to you, that you have not taught me, if nothing else you have indirectly inspired yourself, you will get back on your feet, you just need to take one step at the time, I know how ambitious you are, but you always focused on helping others, hiding, seeing yourself as a sinking ship, trying to help as many as possible before you pass away. We can work trough this together, it is easy to figure out that you are trying to protect others from what you feel that you have become, something that cannot be repaired, something that was never meant to be fixed, but to be used until it had no more to give.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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